Nichole
"Sit." Drego cleared his throat.
He'd been away for only four months and yet I felt like I hadn't seen him in an entire lifetime.
I'd thought my new look would surprise him, maybe finally get a reaction from him, but Drego looked unfazed. Which was more upsetting than I thought it would be considering the fact that I wasn't looking like this because of him. But I wished…
I'd been crushing on the same man for three years. Three years I'd worked for him, been at his beck and call, and he never noticed me. At this point I was sure if I exploded into a million pieces in front of him he still wouldn't notice me.
"What can I do for you Nichole?"
I handed him the file I had used as an excuse to come see him. When I heard he had come into the office, I just needed to see him.
"These are the complaints from four months ago until now. I highlighted with blue color the ones with similar complaints. And then I checked if the complain was legit. I got a rather odd complaint about the new leather causing a rash… It's all in there."
He took the file from my hand and perused it.
"Did you give a photocopy of this to the departments involved?"
I nodded. "And I also gave a copy to—"
I was interrupted when Lisa barged into Drego's office, huffing and puffing. "Drego. You came back and you didn't even tell me?"
"Lisa, I'm busy. Can you not see?"
"I'll leave you to your business, sir. Welcome back." I smiled and nodded to him. He nodded back, giving me permission to leave.
As I walked out, from the corner of my eyes I could see Lisa giving me the eye.
"Right back you sister." I wanted to say, but lacked both the courage and the sass to pull off something like that. Plus, she may be an annoying human being with zero decency and respect, but she was still Drego's girlfriend. Knowing him, she wasn't going to be for long. So I simply walked out, hating the situation and my heart for refusing to let go of him.
***
"You still like him that much?" Christine said, resting her head on my leg as I sat almost uncomfortably on the sofa. "I thought you said it was one silly kiss. A kiss you mistakenly had and he probably didn't even remember."
"It was a stupid kiss. And unfortunately, that stupid kiss is imprinted in my head." I sighed.
Christine raised her hand to my face and tapped my cheeks twice. "Can't you just give up? You know if it's not Lisa, it will be someone else. Someone that isn't you."
"You think I don't know that? I know…" I grumbled.
Christine sat up abruptly, a fierce look in her eyes as she spoke. "If I were you, I would have just told Lisa off and told my boss there and then that I liked him."
I didn't doubt her words. Christine would have done it. She was just that gutsy. I, on the other hand, was not. I couldn't even dare bring up the incident from three years ago.
We'd had a drunken kiss a few days before I resumed work in his company. Of course, back then, I was only a stranger to him. Someone he wouldn't ever have to see again.
The first time we met as employer and employee, I was the only one flustered. At first I thought he was just that good at pretending not to recognize me. But then I realized that he actually didn't remember me or our conversation or our kiss…
"Nichole, just tell him. Tell him you know."
"Are you insane? It's been three years. I can't tell him."
"So you're going to continue living in this misery? Seeing him everyday and having your heart break because he would never look differently at you?"
I was speechless. This was my reality. It hurt, but it's not like I could blame Drego for it. He owed me nothing. It was only one stupid kiss which was forgettable because it was obviously like me. Not worth remembering.
"I'm sorry, Nichole. I didn't mean to make you upset."
I shook my head at Christine. She had no reason to feel bad about telling me the truth.
Christine moved closer, wrapping her thin frame around my body. Christine was a size six and now I was a size ten so her arms were barely covering my body. She was probably still getting use to my new body.
She began to shake me and I found myself laughing despite the sadness that consumed me inside.
"Good. You should smile more often." She kissed my cheeks.
That night sleep evaded me. I was all alone now, no Christine to cheer me up and distract me from my thoughts.
"Drego Ricardo." I said under my breath.
I hated him even before I met him. The stories about him that circulated in the city made hating him easy.
The billionaire playboy. But that wasn't the worst part about him.
Only days after losing his wife, he began to paint the city with his dalliances. I almost refused the job of working in his company because of him, but my mom had taught me never to allow my personal feelings get in the way of work. So I accepted the job.
Life had a way of playing games. And that's how I met him one evening at a bar. He was drunk when I got there. At first sight, I decided it was best to avoid him. To pretend like I didn't know who was under the stupid beard.
His disguise was mediocre, but for some strange reason, it worked. The people at the bar didn't seem to know who he was, or they were pretending. Either ways, he was left alone.
That night I had gone out for a blind date, and unfortunately, I was stood up. Not wanting to feel pitiful, I decided to treat myself. One thing led to the other and Drego and I got talking… and laughing. I hadn't felt connection like that ever, mostly because I didn't let people close enough. But it didn't matter that it was with a drunk, my head was high on joy from the connection we were having.
Later that night, in his drunkenness, he called me a name that sounded familiar at the time. It was later I realized that Avril was the name of his late wife.
Drego divulged a lot of things to me that day and I finally understood him. The reason for all his dalliances. He was trying to drown out his pain the only way he knew how. Avril had turned out to be the wife forged in the bowels of hell and still he loved her… and missed her.
He was capable of love.
I thought he was proud of the Ricardo name. After all, they were the biggest wristwatch designer brand in New York, and one of the most prominent in the country. With prestige like that, the possibility of how much more life can get better could only be destroyed by how far one is willing to imagine. Stamp the Ricardo name on anything and it sold fast. His name was that powerful, and yet, this man hated it with all of his heart.
I looked in his eyes and saw a pain I had never seen before. And the thought that love had done this to him, it was quite scary.
I'd never been in love. Never wanted anyone so much that I felt pain or heartbreak. So I didn't understand his insistence to still hold on to her, especially after everything she'd done to him.
But now…
Fear had become a constant companion. Fear that for the first time in my life, I was unable to let someone go. My heart was unwilling to lose interest.
I wanted Drego in so many ways. But with his heart closed and his unwillingness to let anyone in, wasn't I setting myself up for major heartbreak by continuing to hope that he'd come around one day?