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How I say I love you

Ayr_
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Synopsis
Plague with dreams from another world, Artemesia, the sole princess of a small kingdom was sent to a debutante ball that selects the possible bride of the Emperor whom they are under. She wants the empire, but not the man on the throne.
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Chapter 1 - How A Schemer Died

During my 2nd grade, I was transferred to a special class. Being a transferee at that tender age will only result from the best to worst. Will they accept the foreign being or reject it entirely? Children get along well when they think that you're worthy to be part of their group. Because of my face and family background, my classmates warmed up to me in no time. But in a group of 40, 2 or 5 children still dislike you for the most ridiculous reasons. Being a latecomer, I was always on the receiving end of their suspicions. They only accepted me because of how I looked but would judge my ability in academics and my personality in the social circle.

It's quite funny how people think that the adult world is messed up. But the children's world is way more so. Adults can stand up for themselves. They are adult. But to us, children at that time, being shunned meant being shunned from everything else. No friends, no fun, no opportunities, and most importantly... no hope for the future. Kids thought that eating alone is equivalent to isolating pain. The confidence you've built up will rot in a slow painstaking manner as your classmates laugh at you and openly criticize you for how you look, for who your parents were, and for how badly you perform.

I was never one who openly competes for grades but I always maintain the top 10 spot. Being part of the top students is 5 points towards popularity. A pretty face is merely a bonus. If you don't show everyone your capabilities, you're as good as fodder. Children like to stick to people who are smart, rich, friendly, and pretty all of that at the same time. Be sure you have at least two qualities to maintain your position in the social circle. Having three then you're a prince or the princess, having all four means you're the monarch.

If you want to be accepted, you need to fit in. And that's what I did. And I was everyone's queen.

Until High school came, that is. People said, it was the best years of their life, and here I am, lying in the middle of the street on the very first day of what was supposed to be the best years of my life.

To those who want to know how death feels... it hurts. It goddamn hurts. I felt like my whole body was on fire and I felt the cold seeped through my bones. It felt like needles prickling my very own flesh. I've read that some people saw flashes of their memories right before them, but my thoughts were different. Do I have a decent photo worth a funeral? I hope no one opens my computer.