Things didn't get any better for me after Trish's party. I got fired from my job at the restaurant because apparently Mr. D had used the secret recipes I shared with Mrs. D to start a rival restaurant, I was behind on dad's bills and so far, no one wanted to hire me. At least not after the pool incident video. Everyone thought I was a psycho and painted Allison as the victim! It was utterly ridiculous but nothing I could do about it now.
Nothing but lie on the floor and chug a bottle of chocolate listening to the depressing smooth jazz tapes I found in my dad's drawers hoping the melody would carry me away to a place of bliss and tranquility if only for a moment. So now I was jobless and hopeless and I still couldn't tell Trish and Kye why I never called after leaving the party because I was too embarrassed.
Someone knocked on the door.
"Go fuck yourself!" I yelled staring up at the ceiling.
A few minutes later, my aunt's face obscured my view of my ceiling light and her lips curved into a little smile.
"Honey, it's been two days since school closed for summer." she said. "And I don't want you to spend it drinking chocolate, spraying whipped cream in your mouth and stuffing your face with sprinkles." she pulled a pink sprinkle out of my hair and gestured to the neglected can of Reddiwip on the floor.
"Why because I'll get cavities?" I rolled my eyes.
"Well...that and because there's sea and sun and sand to enjoy and I want you to go out and make some friends." she smiled wider. I could see her face twitch as she held that smile and my eyes narrowed.
I propped myself up on my elbows.
"What do you want Becca?"
She looked away.
"Your sister signed up for that reality TV show." she started. "With every song?"
"Yeah, so what?" My brow shot up as I prodded her further despite having a sick feeling where this was going.
"You and I and everyone on this darned planet know she couldn't sing to save her life." she admitted.
"Uh huh?" I sat up straight. "So what, you want me to take her place or something?"
"We both know you're a shy...girl. What I want is for her to be the face and you be the-"
"No," I stood up and wiped the chocolate off my mouth with the back of my hand. "Do you know what you're suggesting? That I sing behind the scenes for that wench who would crush me under her manicured thumb any chance she got! I've tolerated her BS for years now and I'm not about to take another leap of faith for her!"
"Don't do it for her, then." she said. "Do it for your dad."
"What does dad have anything to do with this?"
She strode to my bed and sat down and patted the spot next to her. I reluctantly obliged, searching her eyes for anything that could betray whatever she was going to tell me but she looked down at her feet. She fidgeted and then I saw it.
Shame.
"Your dads bills are piling up, Penny." she started. She took a deep breath and continued. "I'd offer to help you but, we're in a bit of a fix in terms of...equity."
It was no secret that Becca was a wild child and not-so-surprisingly the black sheep of the Decora family. She was everything that I wished I could be, not that I would ever admit that. A different Jaylen Sizra outfit off the runway every week, Gucci bag with those tiny dogs that look like poodles, a total red carpet candidate. Before the accident, she was even wilder. She'd leave Pepper Pot with one of her Ken-doll looking flings and come back with another piece of arm candy the next week after a rager in Vegas or a frat party in Kappa Phi Whatever.
She was a force to be reckoned with and she was fun for sure but she crossed the line between fun and irresponsible, the moment she blew a fortune at a poker game in roulette a few years back and then she lost her money and had to move in. Mom and dad said she was babysitting for the weekend but the moment I saw her in my pink robe and bunny slippers buried under at least five pizza boxes on the couch I knew we were done for.
So of course the fact that we had no money to foot dad's bills was undoubtedly her fault.
"So you gambled all our money and now we're broke." I spat. "Is that why I've had to work at the restaurant all this time? Because you went on a gambling spree and spent your brother's money on goodness knows what? And now you want me to 'step up' for Allison and you, for dad's sake?"
"Penny, please understand-"
"Oh I understand alright. I understand that you want me to clear up the mess you made. I understand that you want me to play second fiddle to Ally. I understand that you want me to be your little pawn, do as Becca says because mom ain't here and dad's in the hospital. She's in charge. Might as well be putting a circus monkey in XL Gucci diapers to run a household, not that you could let alone sustain a relationship for two weeks!" I shot.
I could see the veins twitching on her forehead and I admit that that was a little extra but none of it was a lie and if it were she'd have denied it already. I swallowed hard expecting her to say something but she remained rooted to the ground fists clenched like she was trying to surpress her anger.
"Do NOT take that tone with me young lady! If there was something I could do, I would! Do you think coming to you was my first choice! Who wants to be burdened with six figure bills when-" she suddenly stopped and sprung to her feet.
"When you could spend it all on more important things than your brother right?" I scoffed. "You should consider joining the theatre because for a moment there, I actually thought you cared if I was okay. Looks like I was very wrong."
"Penny I didn't mean-"
But I didn't wait for her to finish. I sprung to my feet and stormed out yanking the door shut behind me so hard I could hear my windows rattle on the other side. I hopped into my car as I was and drove to the one place I could feel at ease.
The monitor beeped softly, the kitty clock on the wall read 11. It was already late and I hadn't realised how much time had passed since I got here. I sat up rubbing the sleep from my eyes. My gaze shifted to my dad. His chest rose and fell softly, his mask fogging as he breathed steadily. I slipped my and into his and ran a thumb over his knuckles. They were paler and his palms rougher than I remember. He groaned and stirred a bit.
And his eyes flew open. My heart skipped a beat and he turned to look at me. He squeezed my hand tight and tears pricked my eyes and for that fleeting moment nothing needed to be said because just seeing him awake was enough for me.
A few minutes later, dad was spooning mashed potatoes and chicken soup into his mouth and though I insisted on helping him, he wouldn't hear it. He had always been very stubborn but I liked seeing him like himself again.
"So how's school been kid?" he asked. "There aren't any...problems I should be worried about are there? Any bullies, or boys who need to be taught a lesson?"
"Dad, of course not." I told him with a laugh. "I don't have time for dating and besides guys don't really see me like a girl."
"Naw, champ. Ain't gonna be any of that talk here. You are one special selfless and beautiful girl and I should know because you are exactly like your mom." he said. "You have her long black hair, her beautiful sapphire blue eyes, her bubbly laugh, her sense of humor." he placed a hand on mine.
"But I don't have a sense of humor." I pointed out.
"Exactly."
I pushed his arm away and he laughed. I couldn't contain myself and soon we were both laughing like old times, dad making fun of the time I first rode a bike in the park. We were together in the park and he'd just taken the training wheels off. I was so scared of balancing but I saw something scamper up the oak behind me and I screamed and pedalled away.
"Is there a reason, why you're in your pajamas in the hospital?" he asked gesturing to my ducky print pajamas and loose tee.
I shrugged.
"This is how the cool kids dress these days," I joked. "I gotta update you on the latest trends."
"And let me guess, swollen pink and puffy eyes are the in-thing on the make-up front too? You generation Z kids really have it all backwards." he laughed.
There was a moment of empty silence between us, save for the machines beeping and the whirring of the AC in the corner. Dad could always tell when something was wrong with me and right about now I knew that he knew that something was up. My eyes searched the floor for anything because the last thing I wanted right now was for dad to see me troubled. MY head snapped up when he slipped his hand into mine.
"C'mon kid, I know that look. What's bothering you?" he asked eyes glazed with concern.
I shook my head. "N...nothing. Thinking about a chess game we have at school, that's all."
"Pumpkin, I've seen you play chess and you are no Elizabeth Harmon, but you are great. I think something else is on your mind." he cocked his head to one side and narrowed his eyes. "Trouble with your aunt mayhaps?"
"OH no, she's an absolute delight." The sarcasm was dripping from my every word as I avoided his gaze. "She's just a bit much, dad. You know?"
He chuckled.
"Oh I know alright but believe it or not, Rebecca wasn't always like this. She used to keep me in check. Something happened along the way and I guess she just...lost it. She used to pack me lunches, deal with bullies for me and help me with my homework. She payed the house bills behind your grandpa and grandma's back for years with the minimum wage she earned at a dive bar. Just so that everyone could pocket a tenner or fiver here and there." he said looking up blankly at the ceiling as if he was picturing it.
He turned to me.
"Your aunt may seem like a bit of a..."
"...Category 4 Hurricane?"
We shared a laugh.
"She means well and she'll definitely step up when things are difficult. She may not always use conventional methods or ideas but she really means well for both you and Ally. And if there's something she values it's family." He squeezed my hand and a sudden pang of guilt surged through me. Maybe I was a bit brash with Becca earlier.
I looked at my hands.
"Dad, am I...am I selfish?" I asked. "Because right about now, I feel like a really selfish person."
"Really? Because I'm pretty sure I've seen you in this hospital more times than I can count. To see your mom and me, to play and sing for those kids down the hall." he smiled.
My head shot up. "How did you know about that?"
He gestured to the guitar sitting in the corner.
"The nurses are practically bellowing your praises in these halls, telling me how wonderful you've been to everyone. I couldn't be more proud of you Aspen, so... don't sell yourself short. You're a good kid." he said between mouthfulls. "You shtill have sho mush ahead of you."
He squeezed my hand in his again and smiled warmly. And I knew what I had to do.
"Th...thanks dad." I stuttered. "I...I think I need to make a quick call."