The second week of December in Connecticut was almost always cold. Not the coldest month of winter; save that for January. The night promised no warmth, but here in Wilson's room shared with James, hostility was gradually brewing in the air.
In the silence before the storm between James and Wilson, only the cries of the wind outside sounded harrowing. Their faces displayed nothing peaceful, in contrast to their gray room. Both were sitting on the edge of their beds and tried to intimidate each other during the staring showdown.
"What? Have I touched your sensitive nerves?" Wilson broke the equilibrium first.
James kept his mouth shut, but his eyes admitted his deepest feelings, betraying him. He took deep breaths several times to calm himself.
"We may not be adults yet, but that doesn't mean it's appropriate to act childish either. Can we talk it out properly?"
"Why!!?? Because I hurt your darling's feelings, so you confront me now? Some friend you are, dude. You two complete each other so well."
"My darling, you say? Are you telling me I'm biased in this matter? You can't possibly think it was all her fault?"
"Renata is partly responsible for the mess I'm in now!!! If only she had told me before, I wouldn't have been so humiliated." James stood menacingly, but Wilson just straightened his back.
"And why should she tell you? What obligation does she have? I've told you before that she and I have no concrete ev-"
"Evidence. Yes, you've said that. But couldn't you guys just say it to my face? You could, and you chose not to!!!!" James paced around the room like a caged, irritated beast.
"Is that so?" Wilson crossed his legs at the knees. "If we told you before without proof, you would believe everything we said? Really? You worsh-"
"I don't care!!! Renata, you and all can go fuck yourself. How could you, Dude?"
Wilson's calm emotion was stirred, and he stood to face him. He wouldn't take that kind of insult from James. Especially when he cursed at Renata. "Meghan was the one who was in a relationship with you. And no one told her to open her le-"
"Don't You Dare, Wilson!!!"
"No wonder Meghan cheated on a dimwit like you."
James grabbed Wilson by the collar as he said, "You son of a b-"
However, Wilson just smirked and gripped his hands before he swiped James's legs and locked his body, including his neck, practically pinning him to the floor. James was lucky there was a dark-gray, thick rug under him, and Wilson didn't use all his strength, or he could have been severely injured.
He couldn't even move or breathe freely under Wilson's unexpectedly terrifying strength. "I'm good at Judo; have you forgotten? And you dare to bring my mother?"
Even though his joints hurt, James wouldn't easily admit defeat. "Y-You.... Fucking.... Asshole."
James trashed around with all his might, but Wilson's clutch wouldn't budge. "Renata was only a witness. If someone harms you, will you blame a mere witness?"
At those words, Wilson could feel James had loosened his struggle a bit. "I knew that..... But I.... I don't know anymore, Man....." James spoke through his clenched teeth.
"You are coping with your heartbreak; I understand that. It's normal for you to get angry at Meghan because you loved her so much. However, you are going too far if you also blame Renata." Wilson finally released him after James had calmed down.
As they sat on the floor, Wilson told him how Renata was constantly worried about James after the double date. How she was distraught for days because she thought of James's feelings if he knew about this. But mostly if this would damage their friendship. James had to admit that thinking out loud about his feelings with Wilson was much better than submerging in his sorrowful thought alone.
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Everything had been set up—the stores, the routes, the vehicles, and down to the minutes. The only thing left was his outfit. Wilson certainly wouldn't choose a T-shirt; was it too formal to wear a regular shirt? A sweater was a must, as was a coat. Would it be too much?
James was reading a sci-fi novel, but his eyes occasionally darted to Wilson, who had been busy browsing their shared white built-in wardrobe since an hour ago. He put the novel on his almost empty white shelf, as he couldn't watch any longer. "Dude, what the hell are you doing?"
"I am planning what to wear for the outing tomorrow. Why? Do you need anything?"
James arched his eyebrow and stood next to him. He crossed his arms as he caressed his jaw. He picked a dark-grey turtleneck sweater that Wilson rarely wore, a black-grey checkered shirt, a pair of black jeans, and a black coat. "Dude, you need new clothing collections. Not even my grandpa would want to wear most of them. Also, wear that printed scarf I gave you last Christmas." He shook his head as he went back to his bed.
"What's wrong with them? Mind you, I didn't buy them from Target."
James sat leaning on his pillow against the wall. "Yeah, I know. The brands are not the problem; the styles are. With the same amount of money, I can pick out better clothes. Who bought those anyway, your grandma?"
"I did. I bought them whenever my mum took me shopping." Wilson shrugged as he hung the outfit James had just chosen for him.
"And she didn't complain?"
Wilson sighed as he grabbed a manga before sitting on his bed. "She might have mentioned something, but I thought I needed something formal and decent; besides, I rarely go out. You know I'm not fond of casual attire such as flannel or anything with bright colors."
"Dude, you better consider changing all of your wardrobes if you want to attract Renata. Just sayin'."
This time, Wilson couldn't hide his surprise, though he tried to act as calmly as usual. "Whatever makes you think so? I don-"
"Save your breath; I don't need your confirmation." James raised his right palm as he continued his novel reading. James was not known for his perceptive ability; if he were, Meghan would have been out of the picture long ago.
"Was it that obvious?" Wilson's voice sounded calm, though he was nervous inside. He sat on his bed, facing him.
James stared at him with an am-I-that-oblivious gaze. "We have been roommates for more than a year, and you are a predictable creature. Which is easier to spot when you do something out of your habit."
Wilson raised an eyebrow. "Such as?"
James thought for a while before he answered him. "Your eyes always find her whatever, wherever, or whenever Renata is in the vicinity. It's like you have Renadar or something. You always focus your attention every time someone mentions her name, like every piece of information about her is... precious. Do you remember when we were in the SUB, and you glared at that dude from her class? I thought you were going to throw him or something. Your expressions are also different when you talk about her. And I always know Renata is texting you if you have this....." James swirled his hand at his own face. ".....this goofy grin, which is kinda unusual because you rarely grin. Do I have to keep going?"
"There are more? No need; points taken." Wilson shook his head in defeat as he pinched his nose bridge. If James could tell, had Renata also realized? If she already knew, how come she acted normally? Or she had known, but she said nothing because she had never considered him. The most terrifying possibility sent him down a rabbit hole from which he didn't want to emerge.