Renata's tongue was tied.
Or was it a cat that stole it from her? Either way, no answer came out of her mouth. She would need to answer Noah, though.
'Yes, but I didn't do it willingly' she wanted to say, but she did do it out of her consent. Maybe she should say, 'I was coerced, blackmailed.', but what would be the reason, how would she explain the reason. Digging through the memory lane of this specific time was torture.
Noah continued as she mulled over and over, "There was this rumor going around when you left the school, that you were fooling around with some boys in our boarding school. Don't I have the right to know the truth? "
The road started to get jampacked, and her mind too. The road was starting to get hot, and her heart was too, but not in a good way. "Uhh, you sure want to talk about that? It was a long time ago, Noah. What, like 11-12 years ago? I said I'm sorry, OK? " Maybe she shouldn't have gotten into his car in the first place. Anywhere should be better than here. She was trapped, with nowhere to go, and nothing she could do to avoid this embarrassing situation.
"I want to know. Tell me. "
Like stripping a band-aid, she braced herself. "Fine. I did. With Lyle. But I didn't sleep around with anyone else. " Something that Renata didn't notice while pretending to enjoy the road view was that Noah seemed to know the answer already, his face showed no emotions.
"Why? I thought we were happy. "
"I thought so too...." She blinked rapidly, trying to stop the initial tears that kept welling up. The sealed old memories of her first love replayed one by one. The sweet taste of being with him, the bitterness of forcefully ending it and burying everything behind. She hated reminiscing, which made her detest herself more.
"Did I do something wrong?"
She remained silent; she didn't know how to answer it. If anyone was at fault, it was she that put him at such a great risk of getting expelled from the boarding school. How could he deal with it if that happened? What would his family do then?
Renata knew about his family situation and financial problems at the time, despite his trying to hide them. Through hard work and perseverance, he managed to seize several gigs as a web designer on Craigslist. Yes, he saved lots of money for his college tuition and did some investing too, but he still tried his best to splurge on her. She first fell in love with his sheer determination to be successful, then her heart was nailed by his way of putting her first before him.
"Why Lyle? You knew we were at odds with each other. You knew how he treated the 'lesser being' like I was. Was it because he was the most popular guy? Was it his look? Or was it his background? "
"I guess he was just irresistible…." Noah chuckled bitterly, hearing her answer.
"Did you ever love me?"
Renata faced him, staring at the side of his face. "You know I did. I loved you. " Wholeheartedly.
Noah smiled a little. "I guess everything is in the past now. Thank you for clarifying those doubts in me, Renata. " A pang surged in her heart when Noah sighed. She wanted to pour her heart out, telling him she wasn't what he thought she was. But all of it wouldn't change anything; it couldn't undo what had happened.
"How is your life now? Do you have a boyfriend now? Or are you married? "
Renata loosen her shoulders, he seemed didn't want to continue the conversation she despised anymore. Good for her. "I'm single. My parents' store is quite time-consuming, and life-consuming too. So, I just don't have the time, energy, or anything else to be in a relationship. "
She could tell that Noah had changed from how he used to be. He was a boy with a few words. She remembered how they spent their time together. They would work on their own projects or any given task, side by side, in the school library, in silence. Noah was always busy with his part-time work while she was working on her homework. If her mischief kicked in, she would pretend to be unable to solve the problems and ask Noah to teach her. It worked every time. Noah would tutor her with his intoxicating voice. The perks of having a smart older boyfriend. That, excluded how annoying he was when he nagged her.
Noah continued, "Don't you have many employees to help you out? When was the last time you were in a relationship? "
"You've changed."
"What do you mean, Renata? I'm still the same. "
"You are more talkative now. "
"Which one of me do you like?"
Renata was so caught off guard by his question that she tripped in her words. "I… what?"
Noah suddenly pulled over on a curb she was very familiar with. "We are here. This is your home, right? "
Renata looked outside, at the building in front of her, where Noah had stopped his car. It was her apartment. "How did you-" But before she finished asking, he had already gone out.
Noah walked toward Renata's side, and he opened the door for her. Renata stepped out in a daze, confused about how he knew where she lived. She didn't remember giving him any directions, she was too engrossed in the conversation.
"Little doll, why did you run away? You scared the hell out of me." Renata twitched when she heard Morano's voice from behind her. He got out of the car parked on the other side of the road. The old man followed him; his eyes were still red.
Renata quickly hid behind Noah, until she heard Noah speak. "You stupid old reprobates, what would happen if I didn't follow you all along? She could have gone missing. "
"My apologies. It won't happen again. " The menacing old man said politely to Noah. Why?
"So sorry, blame my old body, bladder control issues. So, this means I'm free to go, right? You promised me, Wilson. "
"Wait, what's going on? " Renata looked at Noah and Morano back and forth.
"Little doll, I….."
Before Morano finished his sentences, Noah raised his hand and shut Morano up. "Let me," Noah said as he turned his body toward Renata. Noah's eyes bore into Renata's. "Renata, your father has accumulated a massive debt. To free himself, he sold you to me. As of today, you belong to me. "
As if thunder just nailed her to the ground, her head was blank, blacked out. Everything that happened after Morano left her mother was replaying in her mind. How her mother kept screaming in her sleep; how they faced insults from debt collectors from time to time; how they were forced to live uncomfortably in the tiny apartment she was living in up until this day; and all the nasty stuff she refused to remember.
Her eyes were blinded by an uncontrollable surge of rage, and she shouted at Noah and everyone else. "The hell with that?? He's not my father; he was my stepfather. Even if he is, he has no right to do such a thing. If he has a debt, he should be the one who is responsible, not anyone else!!!"
"Renata, after what you've done to me, after everything I've been through to be with you, do you think I would just let it slide? I will make you pay for all you've done. Mark my words. " Noah always treated Renata delicately; she had never known this side of him.
But she wouldn't back down no matter what. She couldn't. She refused to be Morano's victim, again. "What did I ever do to you??? If you want to blame me, go ahead. But you can't force me to be anything or to do anything. I don't want to be associated with Morano, ever again. You can do whatever you want to him for all I care. I'm not going to pay anything for him. Been there, done that. " Her chest heaving up and down, she chased the air to breathe after all that screaming.
Noah waved his hand, telling those two old men to go. He took out his phone, started typing something, and all of a sudden, Renata's phone rang. 1 missed call.
"That's my phone number. Call me when you change your mind. "
"Not ever." She gritted her teeth while clenching her knuckles.
Noah grinned menacingly at her, which he had never done to her before. "Oh, you definitely will." He got into his car and drove away, leaving her unsettled.