Here's the corrected text:
Mi Joo took advantage of her friend's absence and approached Hyejin; she could clearly see that Eunji had become interested in the new girl.
Her heart was sour with jealousy, but what could she do? Business is business.
Eunji was better than any customer present at that bar.
The woman carefully observed Hyejin's features and wondered: What makes this girl so charming?
Hyejin enjoyed her martini as she looked around; there was no way to say that she hadn't had much luck getting that first contact with Eunji; she felt satisfied.
"You're hired."
Mi Joo had a bitter tone in her voice; she could feel it in her heart as if her favorite toy was now someone else's. So irritating. She hurriedly left, not wanting to be around Hyejin for too long.
Hyejin laughed; she wouldn't be forced to wear many more fancy disguises, just come to this bar and find Eunji. Very, very good.
