Nari felt increasingly tired. She hadn't slept very well due to the drinking she had done the day before, and Donghae's visit hadn't improved her mood at all. She was so nervous that for a few long minutes she couldn't stop vomiting, and it was truly torturous.
She spent some time stuck in the bathroom, thinking that maybe she would stay there.
She was feeling terrible, and knowing that Eunji would see her like that made things even worse.
As depressing as she was being, when you still have some kind of pride left... Or at least you're trying to show that you're proud of something, it's shameful to act so miserable.
Nari wanted to have the strong aura of an older sister, to show that she was capable, but she could be reduced to nothing at that moment.
She felt humiliated and unhappy.
There wasn't much to be proud of, and she felt useless.
