Having only known Baba, I never experienced with as much emotions as I did ever since the girls came into my life. I learned that I don't mind hugs, that I can love and there's more to my imagination than I thought.
It's scary getting to know oneself. I came to realize there was a whole other part of me that was waiting for the right circumstance to show.
For instance, when Charlie, or when the one-time Charlie showed up it wasn't a big deal. Yeah it bothered me that he stopped showing up but he just wasn't the one I knew, the constant Charlie, and I kind of knew it.
While when Jade told me he was the scary thing that denied me of a goodnight sleep for half a decade it bothered me wholly. Even though I found a silver lining regarding that revelation, which is actually sleeping.
My sleeping pattern's been getting back to normal, I've been sleeping better the past few days. It's true I'm still avoiding Jade but to know he was the scary thing wipes the scary part of it. I keep thinking about the time I woke up in the hospital and his face being the first thing I saw and was just about the best thing to wake up to.
Suddenly my head started thinking of lovely things I could've woken up to, like a shooting star or a sudden rainfall.
Perhaps how we react is always about the person. When we don't care, it's just a moment. But if we care, it hits us hard and means more. It could lead us to wrong ways of accepting reality, ways so wrong they only make sense in our head completely neglecting what's real…
"Bliss" Juicy called me from the meter by meter garden, "can we visit Mrs. Malika when you're done? I wanna know this Charlie guy"
"I get off in an hour at 5 in the morning" I said shrugging, "that's too early."
"Then we'll get back to your place, you can sleep till noon and then visit her" Juicy insisted.
"I don't feel sleepy" I said.
"We went to the main slushies and prawn chips shop and they said she comes over every morning," Blue said, "we have to see her tomorrow because they mentioned she'll be out of town after."
"I don't know," I started contemplating the idea, "how about I get off work and we drive downtown to get Irish and Dani and we'll go to the place and wait?"
"Yes!" Juicy said, "he might be a nice guy."
"Like the fake Charlie" Blue said casually with a hint of blush.
"What if he's a douche?" I wondered, "or dead?"
"I like the variety of options you put there" Blue said, "but it'll be fine"
"We just want to know the guy!" Juicy said excitedly, "he doesn't have to know you're Bliss, you'll just put a face to Charlie!"
Danielle is at Irish'sh because her and Blue had a raw this morning, which is why we separated them. Basically, Danielle slept in and Blue asked us to leave the breakfast on the table in case she woke up hungry.
Blue always does this out of fondness; she just likes to make sure everyone gets their breakfast. The problem was, Dani hated this because she feels like Blue only leaves the breakfast on the table so she would eat and then clean the whole thing up by herself.
They fight over this same thing every single time Blue makes us leave the table without removing anything but our dirty plates. Blue does have a point because, after Danielle's said everything she always sits to have a bite.
"Hey people," Danielle yelled at us the moment Blue's car was in Irish'sh driveway, "come inside for a second."
We went inside and Irish looked bored, "any of you got aspirin?" She asked.
"Name all the cheese you know!" Danielle demanded.
Blue, Juicy and I came up with the following cheeses: "Mozzarella cheese, Cheddar cheese, spread cheese, crème cheese, feta cheese, white cheese? And brie"
"Oh" Danielle said.
"She's been screaming at me for an hour telling me normal people only know 3 cheeses by their names" Irish said cutely holding on to her head, "they just named 4, Dani"
"We're not normal people though," Juicy said, "we're some people"
"What's wrong Dani?" I asked when she just looked way too defeated over such a lame thing.
Irish looked at me and then at Danielle as if she just realijed something might be wrong, "you okay love?" she asked Dani who didn't answer me.
"Don't call me that," Dani snapped, "I'm not in the mood"
"Ok, are you okay douche face?" Irish tried to joke.
"I don't know." There was a crack in Dani's voice that was unfamiliar. "Sometimes I wish my family loved me better, respected me better."
Danielle took us to her family house once when it rained so hard we couldn't walk all the way to my place; Dani's is closer to the bus station. She was so hesitant about us meeting her family that we kept saying we could walk a little more to my building, but she didn't want us to.
The moment we stepped inside, we saw how full her house was and how empty she felt living in it. How she walked by everyone without getting noticed made me feel like I wanted to shout at them and announce her arrival.
They only noticed her when one of her sisters started complaining about wanting to lose weight. Her mom suddenly started saying how Dani too needed to lose some, even though she's the tiniest person alive… well, I wouldn't know that! But their mom just used Dani to make her sister feel better about herself.
We stayed there an hour but her family managed to make fun of her the whole time. There were about 12 members of her family there yet she was the bottom of every joke.
It got to the point where it was uncomfortable to sit; we frantically started calling Jack to come pick us up and take us downtown since this area was drowning.
I still remember Danielle's face cracking up, laughing as her family mocked how she cried at everything growing up. When Blue asked her why wouldn't she stop them, she simply told her it did hurt her how much they laughed at her but she was afraid of telling them that and then they would stop. She didn't want her family feeling awkward about making a joke out of her sorrows… she didn't want to ruin the joke.
"Is that Zach?" Danielle asked me and I noticed I got a text, it was from him, "tell him we saw you first." She rolled her eyes at my phone.
"He's asking if you're okay," I pointed outside and through the glass Jack was standing, he waved at us once we saw him.
"Oh." Danielle said looking finally a little well, "I am, thank you, him, either one of you."
"He's asking if you want to go bowling?" I said.
When I asked this, I didn't expect Dani to suddenly look relieved. She looked through the glass at Jack who was standing looking at her waiting for an answer. He started nodding at her, he did it for too long he started to look like a bobble head.
Suddenly Danielle nodded too and I finally saw him smiling, "okay." Danielle got up and rushed outside, the girls and I followed.
"What about Charlie?" Juicy asked.
"He could wait." I said.
I've never been bowling before but apparently Danielle always have. Her picture is all over the wall; she'd won plenty local championships. Her highest score is 293 and it's the best one on the wall as the score second to hers is some guy's and then Jack's 271.
Irish didn't want to change her shoes and refused to play. I joined her after Dani's tried to teach me how to play, which was fun until Danielle got competitive and I thought I was on the way. It was more fun to watch anyways… the pins started to drop for change!
Juicy and Blue took each of Irish and I's shoulder to sleep on; they wanted to work on school projects and exams and thought hanging at the parking building with me yesterday will help them stay up.
Jack looked exhausted, he's been looking tired a while now. He kept dropping the bowling ball on the ground and his score is lower than usual as shown on the chart. Irish thinks he's making Dani win to make her feel better.
Danielle kept an eye on him and called it quits when he started playing on other people's lanes. We came with Jack's car but Blue drove us back to Irish'sh.
The moment we stepped inside Jack tossed himself on a couch and instantly fell asleep. I noticed he covered his ears with his palms.
We quietly went to the kitchen to get something to eat. There were only avocados, sliced provolone cheese, which we forgot to mention and bread.
We made guacamole and provolone sandwiches and started brain storming ways we can use to approach Mrs. Malika.
"We can visit the place after we finish and just wing it" Juicy said.
"Zaki says Charlie was the best goalkeeper, maybe we should start with that" Blue suggested, "that we were fans or something"
"His head is off the couch" Danielle suddenly said, we looked at her and then at Jack who caught her attention. She swiftly got up and gently put his head back on the pillow.
"No," Jack hissed with closed eyes, "the pillow's too soft" he whispered and dropped his head off the couch again.
"Do you have a firmer pillow Iris?" Danielle asked.
"When were feather pillows ever firm?" Juicy shrugged at Danielle as Irish was staring at Danielle quietly.
"Right." Danielle said and asked Jack to skootch over. She sat next to him and placed his head back on the pillow and put her left hand under his head. "Good enough?" She asked him.
"Always been." Jack said.
"Zach haven't been sleeping lately," Irish suddenly said, "he's been going through some financial trouble with his coffee shack and to keep it running, he's doing everything"
"Danielle haven't been sleeping lately," Blue said, "you know how someone used to leave her some bananas and a note whenever she had a bad day? Well, that someone stopped and she thought they might've given up on her"
"Any chance that someone was Zach?" Juicy asked and all of us turned looking at them, Danielle didn't even notice our gazes.
"There's a correlation between the times she changed her hair color and the times Jack shaved his head" I pointed out not wanting to confirm it.
"He's been growing his hair though a while now and she went black" Blue said, "on your birthday yet his hair is still there!"
"So he started growing his hair," Irish said connecting the dots, "and the bananas stopped coming to your room whenever Dani felt bad" Irish looked at them and then at us, "I can't believe Zach never told me!"
"Can't believe Dani didn't tell us!" Juicy said.
"Yeah," Irish lashed out quietly, "what gives!"
"Oh, remember at the airport when she looked offended that he mentioned her name last on the welcome back sign?" Juicy said suspiciously looking like it just made sense.
"Are we seriously gossiping right now?" Blue stopped us, "how about we give them space and go to Mrs. Malika?"
"Yes, and then come back and beat them up for keeping us in the dark?" Irish said.
"Agreed" Juicy said.
"Not too hard though," I said, "I've always wanted to try beating people up"
"You'll have to take Dani," Juicy pointed at me, "fight someone your own size and all that jazz"
"Safety first, yes" Blue said looking proud while Irish was laughing asking us to wonder how would Bliss say 'all that jajj'.
The thing about this town is, they really suck with names. Mrs. Malika's shop is literally called 'Raspberry Slushy and Prawn Chips'. There's a frozen yogurt place called "I Swirl It's Good!" and of course, "Irish'sh Frosht".
We went inside and it looked fancier than it seems. The place is not packed but costumers keep coming and going. The workers are in black attire and pink ties. Of course we ordered drinks and a chips bag as we waited for the owner to come check on the place.
Irish kept busy talking to one of the sellers, they all had customers to serve but one had no problem keeping people waiting talking to her…
"So, this is Blue" Irish started introducing everyone when the silence between her and the seller turned too awkward.
"Ah, Blue you're so beautiful just like Iris" the seller whose name is Moe said.
"Yeah," Irish said, "but she's the more beautiful version"
"Yeah, and I'm just a virgin" Juicy randomly interrupted and swiftly covered her mouth blushing, "I'm sorry I just got nervous and thought what would Dani do totally forgetting about the fact that she's the worst at meeting people for the first time" she rambled on nervously but seller Moe couldn't stop laughing.
"Well, that was Juicy" Irish said chuckling, "and this is Bliss…"
Ever spontaneously uttered the word wow because what's in front of you is just too beautiful not to do so? Mrs. Malika walked in and the place turned from a fancy shop playing current hits to a fancy shop that needs classic background music for such an entrance.
Moe went back to serving customers as I looked Mrs. Malika's way contemplating whether I should talk to her or simply flee.
She caught my glimpse and started walking towards me instead of the branch's manager, "Bliss? Is that you?" Mrs. Malika said.
"Ah, yes" I mumbled, "how?"
"Yeah, I never forget a face." She starched her arm and firmly shook my hand, "you look the same, like that kid who grew up faster than everybody else then stopped while everybody grew even more." She said smiling.
"Yeah, there was a time when I was the huge kid at the back of the class then suddenly the tiny one at the front" I said awkwardly, "how do you know me exactly?"
"My son…" Mrs. Malika started and both Blue and Juicy nudged me that she easily brought him up, "at the age of 5 or 6, wow long time ago" she gave a fancy laugh, I swear a fancy one…
Apparently she's forgotten what she was about to tell me; she suddenly stopped talking awkwardly looking at me…
"So he got invited to a birthday party." She suddenly started, "I trusted he was going to have a blast but when I went to pick him up I found him hiding alone in the kitchen under the sink while the birthday girl and invitees were all sitting watching a movie. It just broke my heart how some kids laughed at him, I still felt like I was a new mom and he was my only and I just wanted to take him out of that house and protect him, you know!"
"I know" Juicy said randomly to herself.
"Before we left you" she nodded at me, "you asked us to wait, it was dramatic how you did it but the cutest thing I've seen till date" she smiled and suddenly the memory of that day started playing in my head, how I dared forget about such a moment, "so you rushed to my son who had his head down and hugged him! They were just kids but dear, when you did that I felt like I needed it too. It meant the world to me when my son looked okay after you did that."
"Bliss hugged someone?" Juicy said and I kept staring at Mrs. Malika in disbelief and I noticed Irish and Blue staring at me.
"No she didn't" Blue said, "she must've mixed her with another Bliss"
"No she's the one" Mrs. Malika said looking confident and I was still tongue tied, god how I walked around believing I never knew what a hug is or what it does. "You were his first crush even" Mrs. Malika went on as her face lit up talking about her son, "one day he came from school furious that one of his friends lied to him about hearts being the same size as a clutched fist." She said and spontaneously clutched her fist, "he told me Mama my fist is too small, how can Bliss fit in it?"
"Aww" I heard my girls.
"Lady you're such a mom!" Juicy chuckled, "you're totally embarrassing your son"
Mrs. Malika gave another fancy laugh, and put a hand on my shoulder, "he's still that adorable believe it or not."
"Well, Bliss is awfully quiet!" Blue said, "don't you remember?" I looked at Blue, the girls and Mrs. Malika still feeling bad about forgetting all that. The fact that he was Charlie too warms my heart to no extent.
"I know you're that Bliss" Mrs. Malika tried to tease me. She could be my new found most beautiful human being, but her demeanor is approachable and her face is just too kind, "you look like you're starting to remember."
"Was his name Charlie?" Blue asked me and I repeated the question to Mrs. Malika.
"Charlie?" She shrugged, "no, that's farfetched" she snickered and they all looked bummed, "my son's name is Zaid."
When Mrs. Malika said his name suddenly my nails were the most interesting thing in the world. I couldn't look at her or the girls or talk at all.
She excused herself to check on the place and all I did was keeping myself busy looking at my nails then I traced my fingers and made a fist out of my hand. Then I opened my hand and I looked at my palm and made a mental note to moisturize my hands better.
"Bliss!!!" Juicy shook me, I looked in front of me and they all looked concerned, "you okay? What's up with you?"
"Guess we'll add you to Dani and Zach and beat you all up," Irish said, "you hugged Charlie when he was Zaid. We thought you didn't do hugs!"
"Oh my god, Zaid!" Blue said.
They kept talking and I was still lost in my head trying to calculate all the times Jade's been around but I didn't see him! He said it himself 'I was in your life a lot Bliss but you never saw me' why didn't I see him? I see him now! I see him clearly even past walls and even when I'm downtown or when I was lost in New York, I see him.
"Bliss answer me!" Blue said, "is he the one from the peanut allergy night? Is he the one from the airport? Indigo Blend?"
"Yes" I started muffling a cry but I was crying alright.
"Honey!" Irish was pouting like every time someone cried, I just never thought I'd ever be the one crying. She hugged me and I felt Juicy and Blue's hands patting my back.
"Can we go home?"
On our way back home I tried to think of the best way to go and fix what I made of Jade. I made him feel like the worst person… But since I had to keep quiet doing so, the girls assumed I needed to get over him.
Basically, they kept telling me I'll be okay, then suddenly started bombarding me with suggestions of ways to get past this and stories all about how they got over some people they grew attached to at some point.
Irish said whenever she had the flu, which she gets a lot. It never made her look any less dressed or less poised. I always admired that about her, how committed she is to looking like egjactly what she wants to be seen as.
She says it's the one thing she got from her mother. People always praised her mom on how clean and sharp looking her kids are –before Jack was an issue.
When her mom left them she didn't want to look less dressed, purely because she didn't want to feel she'd be any less without her mom. She wanted to perfect the one thing her mom did best so she won't need her anymore.
Blue mentioned the time she started making fruit salad on daily basis, after having had hated them practically her whole life.
It reminded her of the time her friend whom she liked fed her fruit salad for the first time and she only accepted out of utter love for him, which surpassed the hate she had for fruit salad.
When he left her hanging, she didn't want fruit salad to be special any more. So she made and ate fruit salad for many days until she loved it enough and was over him.
Juicy told me about her transition from a person who refused all kinds of touching to a sentimental hugger.
The girl who called her a Nearly Neck-less Head was her first friend, the first person she ever vented to and her first secret handshake, which was a hug and 3 pats on the shoulder.
Now Juicy loves hugs to the point she feels like there's something missing when she'd lived a whole day without squeezing another human being. Also, she's an open book, she's not afraid of her emotions and she's freakin' badass!
Danielle has a tee-shirt with Juicy's famous line of: "I'm an open book, it's your problem if you don't like reading."
And another one with Blue's follow up line and the only Harry Potter reference she managed all by herself: "I'm an open book, in the restricted section."
We got into Irish'sh house and there we saw Danielle falling asleep on the ground and Jack's head falling off the couch again. Her hand still was reaching for the couch and his hand was reaching for the floor.
"I don't want to beat them up anymore" I said looking at them.
"Yeah!" The girls sighed together.
"What's the date today?" I asked remembering about Miss Tea's birthday.
Juicy and Irish searched for their phones to check, "November 19th" Blue said, "feeling better yet Bliss?"
Unable to compress how I felt anymore I started telling them all about Jade. How it all started off with an apology, they made me apologize to him at school for making fun of his Asthma.
Then as we found out today, he was the one kid I hugged. I still can't believe how I forgot about that day. We played hide and seek and when I saw him with his mom I felt guilty about forgetting about him throughout the game. I hugged him because at that time, I often felt bad and I didn't want him to feel bad because of me.
He was Charlie! Charlie Chapwin, my first friend, my first company and the reason why I see shooting starts at the sight of mirrors.
He was the scariest thing I opened my eyes to when he wore a mask. Now that I think about it, he gave me a special moment to share with Baba. That dim light wouldn't have existed if it weren't for that one scary night.
He was who made me feel less self-conscious about talking to people, regardless of how he introduced himself or his name to me when he was just the guy from The Cafeteria with a chipped tooth and a kind face.
He made me like coffee without giving another thought to how much I disliked it with his usual ice-cream blend, he was there when I had the peanut allergy, he cared that he was gaining and losing points with me! How is it that it was always him?
"Do you love him?" Blue asked when I realijed I've stopped talking and got lost somewhere in my mind.
"I don't know if I could do that" I said feeling unsure.
"Really?" I noticed Danielle was sitting next to Juicy, "to love, all you need is a beating heart, remember?"
"I need to explain myself though" I said feeling nervous.
"Then let's go!" Blue grabbed her car keys and they all got up and I felt overwhelmed…
"No, I'm really feeling anxious" I said with a shaky voice, "he's invited me to his nana's tomorrow, I'll try to make amends then."
"Honey you got this!" Irish said and hugged me.
The girls did try to calm me down to get ready for tomorrow, but once I told them he invited me to his nana's birthday they started thinking of what I should get her.
"I'll google gift ideas" Irish said.
Blue suggested we get her a scarf but I've never seen Miss Tea with a scarf. Juicy asked me what she liked and all I know is that she loves mints and cares for them and that she takes pride in being pretty so she suggested a mirror and some Mentos.
"How long does it take to google!" Danielle frowned at Irish who was still clutching to her laptop furiously typing.
"Sorry, Wikipedia wanted $5 donation, I couldn't say no" Irish cutely shrugged, "I'm googling for real now!"
"Ok, what do you got?" Danielle said.
"Bliss is phasing out again" Blue said and I realijed I was listening to them staring at one spot with an open mouth.
"Oh," Irish said excitedly, "how about a peppermint scented candle?"
"She just said her house already smells like mint" Juicy said looking unimpressed, "how could that be special?"
"Pretty sure it'd be special in her bathroom" Danielle joked.
We went to the mall and got a peppermint scented candle and seeing I didn't snap out of it yet, they drove me back home and wrapped it and put a nice yellow ribbon around it from my collection. They gave me the gift and I put it on the table.
They decided they wanted to stay the night and I was wholeheartedly grateful for that. Like always, they managed some shorts and tee shirts from my closet and spread the sheets on the floor. They slept on me, each 2 on each side of my torso shared a duvet.
Amajing how our house was always low on covers, sheets and pillows. Now it's so full of them the whole floor can spend the night.
"If things don't work out great," I finally spoke, "at least we'll have Dani and Jack's wedding" I nudged Dani who was sleeping to my right.
"Aww" Juicy uttered, "they'd make such cute babies!!!"
"Yeah," Blue said, "at first we thought it was unusual but we had all day to realize it seemed natural that you 2 would head it off"
"I'll put my chair in the middle of the hall because I'm with both bride and groom" Irish said and cracked herself up.
"No we're not a thing." Dani said, "we're not talking about me, let's change the subject."
Irish got up saying she needed something from her bag, she came back holding on to one of the notebooks she writes in.
"I'll read you a story I've written" she said, "it's Bliss and her Baba inspired, a story that rhymes."
"In other nations, that's called a country song" Danielle joked, "sorry, we're all ears and when I say that, I mean Blue's ears"
"Ugh," Blue said, "you couldn't be nice for a full day huh?"
"My bad, my bad," Danielle said, "Iris"
"It's called Monster, it makes sense in my head but I don't know about yours" Irish said lying back on my shoulder, "here goes nothing."
The monster lived under the bed
Moved in the dark and had no head
Its footsteps were of coffee's brew
And disappeared when light came through
The monster lived within my head
It told me looks are all I dread
Whispered my face was of a witch
Is that so? Riddikulus, bitch!
The monster lived inside my shoes
Walked through the steps I feared I'd lose
It made me doubt my existence at all
Got on a plane and left it crawl
The monster lived around my heart
It made it tough, cracked it apart
Convinced me love's not meant for me
I flushed it out; I had to pee
The monster lived through my blue ink
Said no one cares what you might think
Your parents lived, left you alone
I tore the page and it was gone
Hereby and on the monster's dead
The truest thing I've lately said.
What I noticed working at the parking building is people always have a soft spot. I've worked enough to recognize a lot of faces that often honked at me.
Some of the faces I recognized caved in to their feelings in front of me and let me in on some things they really wanted to say.
A girl once told me she always complained about her mom's voice, how it would go through walls, it was just loud and annoying to her. She started losing some of her hearing at some point in her life and that's when she appreciated her mom's voice. How she could hear her mom still when she hardly heard anyone else.
Her mom passed away and this girl was staring at me with such regret. She kept telling me everything happens for a reason! She never thought what she complained about her whole life would turn into a blessing.
A man simply told me once that Grey's Anatomy is his favorite show. He asked me to watch it and strictly told me to squint my eyes when the camera's on Dr. Webber. He says if I do so, I'll see his father whom he lost.
He said he doesn't own a picture of his dad and explained why. They were a family that couldn't pay for privileges that weren't crucial. Whenever they had a party and wanted to take a picture to commemorate it, they would knock on their neighbor's door to borrow his red camera.
Their neighbor only allowed them a single photo each time, and his father was always the one who took the picture.
Other times I just hear advice, fights or compliments of people talking to each other in cars. There was a girl once in the passenger seat crying her heart out, the man driving tried to calm her down.
He said that your face's beauty or ugliness are both not one's accomplishment. So, on what bases should we thank or take offense if we're told we hold either?
I thought that was solid advice but she cried even more. She was beautiful but she needed to hear it. I could've told her had I been courageous enough.
Standing in front of Miss Tea's apartment, I wonder if I'll find my courage. Jade told me the door's always open, so maybe I'll open it and take a peak and then I'll make up my mind about going in or going home.
I slowly turned the knob and thanked god their door isn't as squeaky as ours. I looked around and the room looked empty until my eyes reached the living room. I stared and felt my whole body resisting to collapse on the ground as my heart gave me a jolt and finally decided to barge in and fix this, try to fix this!!! I'm not gonna do what I did with Baba, I'm not gonna be weak and fall to the ground at the sight of this! I'm gonna be strong; he told me to be strong.
As fast as I could I ran to the living room to Jade's side… he's lying on the ground face up, eyes open with all his limbs spread.
"Jade, JADE YOU'RE OKAY" I yelled with my eyes drowning in tears falling on my hands as I shook him…
"Bliss?" I heard and unclutched my fists off his shirt.
Jade looked at me not moving and I stared at him trying to realize what happened and whether this ground is good enough for me to bury my face in it. I tried to pat on the crease I caused on his shirt to make it look right again but my hands were shaking.
"You're okay?" I said finally.
"I'm okay." He smiled and I wiped my tears and I finally saw his kind face, you could squeeze my heart right now and it would grow bigger telling you that it loves this face. "Are you?" he asked.
"Yes." I said still freaking out staring at him checking his pulse and breathing, making sure he's okay and alive.
"You got quite the ugly crying face" Jade teased while I was still sitting beside him staring at him with wide eyes with both my palms on him forcing him on the ground.
"What?" I broke out of it, "oh piss off, that's what I get for being scared for you?"
"People like you should never be given a reason to cry" Jade said, "my theory, which I just came up with, is that ugly criers have been blessed with that to show people they deserve all our effort to make them happy."
"Can you stop being a pain for a little?" I said and lied next to him and closed my eyes waiting for my heart to stop pounding.
"It's just a thing he does." I heard Miss Tea's voice and was suddenly on my feet. "He lies on the ground looking at the ceiling when he gets stressed."
"Why was he stressed?" I asked, "why were you stressed?" I asked Jade.
"He was overthinking whether you'd show up or not" Miss Tea said smirking, "did you get me something?"
"Oh, yes!" I said scanning the area with my eyes and found the gift on the ground, I must've thrown it running to Jade. I picked it up smiling awkwardly and gave it to Miss Tea who squinted at me then gave me a hug.
"I hate it when people shake their gifts when they receive them" Miss Tea said, "what if the thing breaks, right?"
"Right" I said still standing in front of Miss Tea and Jade.
"I'll make tea." Jade said laughing under his breath.
This has been one of the best days I spent. Miss Tea is motherly, easily happy and I admit quite frightening. She put her two daughters on speaker and made us sing Happy Birthday to her 8 times; once for each decade she lived and then she opened the gifts.
Honestly, I've never realized how simple thoughtful gifts can get. She got a crate filled with Indian mangoes from Mrs. Malika, which she instantly pealed a bunch of and stuffed my and Jade's faces with them.
From her other daughter who goes by the name Sam she got a mint kind she's been looking for having. It looks a lot like lemongrass and has a strong beautiful scent.
Seeing her reaction to those gifts made me feel happy because her people are awesome,x but anxious because my gift is not.
She unwrapped my candle and looked at me uttering the warmest thank you Bliss that ever reached my heart.
"It's really simple" I said feeling as though I should justify the stupid gift.
"That's how I like it." She said and held Jade's box, "I always keep the best to last." She added holding it.
"Well, I hope you like it." Jade said with expressions that indicated she's gonna like it.
The patience that erupted out of Miss Tea unwrapping Jade's gift was incredible. She did it slowly and fondly because she knew it's gonna be the best gift.
The look on her face when she first picked up the lid is something I'd want to live to see more of. She covered her mouth looking at what's in the box.
"You found it!" She said and Jade wiped her cheeks of tears with my handkerchief, he looked at me and shook it. "This is my husband, the not so handsome one" she said and showed me the picture. It was of a young man in a uniform.
"He looks okay!" Jade said defending him.
"You only say that because you're as non-existing-ly handsome my love" Miss Tea teased and hugged Jade, "you 2 are the best thing that happened to my eyes!"
"You 2 are also the best thing that happened to my eyes" Jade said looking at me, "nana and grandpa of course" he crumbled his face and shook his head.
Miss Tea fell in an emotional place telling us about her late first husband. He always had tears at the corner of his eyes, not that he was crying but his eyes were always watery.
She said after he'd passed she slept a lot! Because when she was awake, she waited for him to come back.
"I'm not saying he was my everything or that my time was all his" Miss Tea explained, "I'm still of worth! But the moment I was done being with myself, I waited for him. Though it was still agonizing, sleeping made it easier because it shrunk the time I spent waiting."
Later she started playing a game with us, turns out Miss Tea is so much fun. She told us her head is a cassette filled with a hundred songs. Our task was choosing a number between 1-100 and she'd sing the chosen number's song to us.
She sang a couple of songs only that I never heard before but enjoyed, while the remaining numbers we chose were apparently broken because the cassette doesn't work well anymore.
While we were eating the cake, a very delicious carrot cake Miss Tea's phone rang of a reminder to sleep.
"We have 20 minutes until I'll have to go to bed" she said, "wanna swing with me?" She asked me looking embarrassed for the first time.
"Okay."
Past the living room was a massive marbled area with a magnificent swing set in the middle of it. There's paintings hung on the wall surrounded by scattered frames of family photos. Miss Tea hung her late husband's new found photo next to a young picture of herself and asked me to sit with her.
"Wait a second" Miss Tea told me, "Zaid, these things aren't gonna push themselves! Take turns between me and Bliss"
"It's your birthday, so okay" Jade said and pushed nana while I awkwardly tried to work this thing on my own. I got so nervous I ended up swinging sideways.
He put his palms on my back and pushed me, "umm, it's not my birthday" I said, "you don't have to push me."
"Relax, would you?" Jade said and I shut it and tried to relax.
Winter is in my opinion, the most wonderful time of the year; everything turns magical. Standing by a red light waiting for it to change to green is beautiful around winter time. All the cars would be there with the windows down and music up.
Being on this swing feels a glimpse like that. The breeze got nicer the more Jade pushed me and I'm listening to all the laughter we're bursting with.
Miss Tea talked of a time when Jade came to her for help, she advised him whatever it was, it'll get better if he sleeps on it.
His mom, Mrs. Malika had just had her appendix removed and was complaining about a stomachache and he didn't know how to help. Taking nana's advice, he put his head on her tummy and took a nap every single day until his mom told him she felt better.
The problem was, Jade didn't stop there. Seeing the great results with his mom, which she faked out of love… he decided to apply that to everything going wrong. He slept on his English test, his laptop when it broke and at his first job cleaning the dishes.
"Amazing how I woke up with this hair" Jade went on, "and yet somehow believed sleeping on things would fix them!"
Miss Tea's reminder went off again and she made us take her to her bathroom. She hugged me goodbye and wished me a goodnight. I asked her if it were okay if I called her nana and she told me she thought I called her that all along.
Before we left, she gave me and Jade some money, which is something she always did before he left no matter how old he's getting.
"What are the movies in that channel I always skip called?" Nana asked Jade opening her bedroom's door again. "The kind of movies I sleep through"
"Indie movies?" Jade asked not sure.
"Yeah," Nana pointed at him and nodded, "you two look like a couple from these movies, we're rooting for you but deep inside wonder why didn't they cast a better looking couple."
"Awesome." Jade chuckled while I laughed at how serious nana spoke telling us that but then gave a wink and shut the door.
We cleaned up the place and put the chairs back to their places and turned all the lights off except the one in the hallway.
"Ice cream?" I asked him once we stepped out of the building.
"Was just about to ask" Jade said and went to get the car.
"As if you were in my heart" I said.
"Hum?" Jade turned around and asked and I heard what I just said…
"They say if one says something the other was thinking, it's like as if they were in each other's hearts" I said feeling my heart is my throat.
"I see," Jade smiled, "I didn't know that."
"Yeah," I said trying not to freak out, "people with no general knowledge are always surprised!" He laughed and went for the car while I froze.
"Hey don't do that." Jade suddenly said as I was filling the silence with drumming with my fingers along with the music on the radio.
"Sorry," I said stopping, "I thought you didn't hear me, you're way too focused on the road"
"Hear you do what?" Jade looked confused, "I'm talking about forgiving me this fast! You shouldn't do that, not this easily."
"What do you suggest I do?" Well, it was a rhetorical question but Jade still had an answer, a serious one where he had to park the car and look at me.
"I don't know! Shove me around, throw some punches or yell at me" He said.
"What if I do that and your tooth breaks again?" I added playfully while he still had that serious look, well, I think he's trying to look serious but he looks constipated. "You do look better with it fixed I'm not gonna lie."
"Then ask me to explain myself!"
"You did actually!" I said, "you think I didn't listen?" I sounded hostile, I mean that's absurd! "You said you saw me and finally wanted to introduce yourself as Jade instead of my Charlie Chapwin but you'd forgotten you still had your scary mask on and you didn't want to risk me finally seeing you with that so kept far…"
"Wait," Jade said looking taken aback, "I never told you I was Charlie."
"After a lot searching, I found the Charlie you paid to cover for you that one time." I said smirking, "Were you ever going to bring that up?"
"Of course!" he said earnestly, "Listen, Bliss" Jade looked at me quite lovingly with a hint of concern, "I'm the same person."
"I know you are" I said trying to stop him from explaining himself.
"No, I need you to know that I am the same person! I need you to know that." Jade said and breathed heavily, "Charlie happened because your dad invited me over and I was still embarrassed about the asthma thing, when they made you apologize to me remember?"
"When I thought you were a cute girl" I teased and he finally smiled, "of course I remember"
"So, I couldn't show you my face again and not have you recognizing me" he shook his head laughing at himself, "it was just a way to build my self-esteem and also, it was enriching listening to you that's why I kept showing up"
"I get it," I said feeling guilty, "what I don't understand is, why didn't you use the masks and all the wrong names I called you to just leave this person, me, who blurred you out all this time!"
"I did wonder that sometimes," he said and suddenly went back to driving, "but then years later you walked in to The Cafeteria with your broken jaw and I told you my name is Jade." He smiled, "it was perfect because called me Jade and I was like, here's my person! The right person who kept calling me the wrong name."
It's funny how I'm nervous to say it yet when I think it in my head, it relaxes me. Before Baba's passing day I'd never uttered I love you, not even in a whisper.
I've always wondered why do people get to ask what are the odds, but I'm always asking for the bad odds to stop happening to me.
The moments Jade's been in my life are the odds I refused to believe. I was so consumed in thinking I was the unluckiest person in the world who inflicted jinx upon herself and all her surroundings. Yet here I am finally wondering…
What are the odds of catching a shooting star reflecting on a mirror? What are the odds of having the most wonderful person in the world not giving up on you, calling you their person? What are the odds of having peanut allergies in an empty street and make it? Perhaps these are humble odds that often occur, but not to me.
"It's open!" Jade said and I looked ahead.
He left the car and walked to the shop then looked back at me waiting, I realized I was still standing by the car. I walked to him with my arm stretched, he took my hand and we walked in.
The lady inside knew him right away, she started making his Usual blend of raspberry and coffee ice cream. He asked her to make it two because I want the usual and am so over Indigo Blend…
There were no tables in the shop seeing it was too small; we sat outside of it on a bench that creaked with my every move.
We sat in silence watching cars and exchanging funny faces. This reminded me of Baba; he always did a funny face around surveillance cameras and every time we got on a public elevator and there was a mirror.
The ice cream, this brilliant blend of flavors, the weather, the company and the moment were just too magical and enough for me. I felt a sense of contentment that I've never experienced before.
The drive back home felt short and easy, I stared at the window the whole time seeing Jade reflecting on it. Whenever he looked at me I turned to face him and yelled something, he freaks out easily for a person with Miss Tea as a grandma.
She's the sweetest person but I always have to remind my eyes to please not look at her balcony on Halloween. She wears a scarecrow custom and would patrol her balcony the whole day, kids in other balconies live for that day.