irrespective of the fact I'm jolly , I'm a person of dual persona ....you could feel the warmth of the sun if you're close to me but the heart felt cold to me !! ahh you maybe be thinking I'm trying to say that I'm a complete opposite of coconut isn't it ?!!...misen writes in her diary .
other day .... after school the day felt different a little cold ,.. barren surroundings! misen who lives with her grandparents always felt cold when she had questioned "her parents while writing in her diary , why would you order me to do something if you never cared for how i was doing ?,"what if I've lived with you , then also you could've taken over the responsibilities for a daughter you had bought into the world ..!
(misen) diary writing is habitual since childhood, not being able to ask what she wanted to !! not being able to say what she wanted to she kept on writing it instead..." her daunting days always were hard to go through"... a lot that even her grandparents didn't know...her closest sibling..her close cousins!! she was always better at writing than speaking to people..an " eloquent " girl her emotional feelings attached to evryone around her was troublesome that she never troubled anyone with her thoughts!!
(misen)- now that I'm growing up they want me to go live with them !..ahh visit them , ...(cries)..did they ever asked even if i didn't demand of what I'm in need for, or how was my day when i was too ..sick everybody knows how to compain isn't...then how should i complain..tear the page and she writes again !, ...why even bringing me into the chaos when you ignored all of it and acted too much demanding out of reach ... knocks !!, on the door ...(misen) ...mi ...mi.. are you sleeping in ?....!!maybe she's..a minute later* ...ah grandma i was washing up my face my eyes was tired so ..! " really ?..it seems like tears .." ahh why would i cry granny ...?! chuckles ..i was washing up after studying so ...okay then come down for dinner !!, ..ah okok I'll be there in a minute! ...sighs !!! .escaped ! she thought in her mind but didn't sigh today ....no groans from her mouth ...out of words....
she believes that human is mean but lovable even if the knife in the back was from the human!! crazy isn't it ?!!! ...the side where are no ecstatic guestures , no sunny mornings !!!! faul play with a smile ..that timid side of her " that another me" side of misen who no one knew ....(misen) at the dinner table - grandpa...little grandpa..are you sick somewhere you look a bit changed today or my eyes have blurr vision somehow ?!! ..groans a bit..o...offf course little brother your eyes have some sort of problem.... I'm as healthy as Ironman!???.huh! aren't i ? ...yes yes you're the strongest man ...my wingman ! Are you having off mood , why are you so dull little brother?!!... something happened?? "controls cries",...hhh...hh... chuckles again no no grandpa.. I'm absolutely cheerful as sunflowers in our garden ... really?! ahhh yes of course who is having upset mood??! hhh.....ahhh i get it you're on menstruation ahh brother its okay !!, if you want something delicious....to.... who's having menstruatio..n.nn.hm I'm perfectly fine . don't you think too much little grandpa .!! I'm done you must eat and sleep I'd better go and rest !!
"I've assignments", .ok have a good night .. sleep tight.. grandpa!! grandma you too .. I'll get going.. . grandpa chuckles...ah this kid use to sleep with me whole childhood now that she have her room i don't know what she's doing..if she's upset ...!!, gosh. honey !... don't worry you rest in the room ... I will do the the fishes don't forget to take your medicine...( something misen don't know yet ). ..
midnight ... cries**...slurp..h..hhh.
"the nights are the best part of the day , and eyesore to lonely feelings" ....the day when she's broken.. deformed into a timid human..not that she is not uncomfortable telling her grandparents but by the time eyes grow old .. children don't want to let the eyes worry for their forlorn feelings ...so they put on a smile for a moment and go on ..(misen writes in her diary) cries doesn't stop ...!, ..on the days like this people need young eyes to explain everything to ...the young which will just listen and won't say anything but it's okay ... without pitiful advice ..(misen),... I'm not big enough to have a lot worries ..but aren't i a human..! i hate people who didn't bother much demand too much by the time she says to herself?! ...she likes the moon ...it just listens.. she likes the sky which just stare back...
... I'm misen but a still little kid they bought into the world she says and people that question me.. about why I'm like this saddens me the most ! what and if you were at my place...
the more she feels the more she writes ,, one of her diary is not known by any of her friends and family members she writes the worst days into ...the days she feels like hiding, the day she's broken , the day she's the most helpless asking for no more"mean actions"...the more she feels the more she's trapped ..(misen)- ...ahhhh why is it too hard to live in this inhuman world ,..i guess only reason I have is those people who stayed with me in my good and bad."when i was sick to death", "when i wanted something",.."when i was nothing but a gearless child ..when i knew what world is ..maybe ...maybe probably..the ones who brings you aren't always the godly humans but not more than people"who make me feel like maybe they'll be burdened if I'll say this to them ..,, maybe they'll be upset ..i should upset myself in their stead but than ..a chuckle smile Comes before "he's the one godly figure to me .. who's my more than a mother",. ..who says only a mother could handle a girl..misen wipes her tears ...i must live fluently for them who want me ...who are wanting to give their all .."unconditional gestures..of them ..keeps on wanton me to smile and Live ...she smiles with soaked eyes..and decides to end the longest day (maybe somewhere they know , she's sad sometimes but all they do is trying to express to her as much as love they have
she's timid yet strongest...! she's emotional so she doesn't bother anyone just like the moon " it shines less bright than usual when it travels oppositely from the Sun every month. In early summer ... some people are that moon which glows bright but when faces something denser than usual they don't express they just dim their shine go through it and get back to how it was ....so,
the day ends she sleeps" the another she", ...who will wake up ...incandescently,...the "another mi"..!