Chapter 17 - Chapter 17. Redemption

-Natasha-

[8 Hours ago]

I honestly had no idea where I was going when I stormed out of the hospital room, but at least it helped me realize that I still had my emotions and pain could affect the black rose as it did anyone else. I kept walking and feeling the air blow past my face wiping the tears away through the sideways. I kept running until I felt a gentle hand grab my shoulder. I tried to fight it off and keep running but he held me and turned me around. "Stop" demanded Rajesh, he now looked more upset than worried. "Tell me what the fuck am I missing here Natasha? What's he rumbling on about?" he demanded. Grasped by confusion, my body shook, I couldn't start explaining the mess that I had put all our lives in. I just sobbed on and threw myself into his arms. Though I pretty much knew that he had quite a hot attitude towards me back in the day, it was probably for me to realize how much I loved Merlin and to step up rather than be a coward on the matter. I figured I had to man up even in this case and say it out to Rajesh, if he'd judge me then fuck it.

"I messed up Raj" I cried, he gently removed me from his hug and looked right into my eyes "you're behaving like Priya, this is not you Natasha" he complained. I did know Priya could be a cry baby to Rajesh but she had always been tougher than I'd ever been so this was a rather inaccurate deduction by Rajesh. However that was not important right now. I needed to figure out how to unmask the black rose to Rajesh. "I am no longer the girl you used to know Raj, I've changed" I said, but Rajesh kept looking at me as if I'd said oranges are delicious and he'd be ready to agree with me. "Why are you looking at me like that?" I asked, curious to know what exactly was in his mind but he just cackled. "What do you think I am, an idiot?" He said probably expecting me to get what he was talking about.

"Natasha you've been here for five years, that's how long you've loved Merlin…" it seemed clear that he was about to ride off topic so I interjected, "pardon me Raj but that's just how old the black rose is as well, and Melissa too". He quizzically glared at me, before he asked the inevitable question, "What's the black rose?" I could answer him instantly but my tongue quivered as if the brain had sent to it some sort of distress signal. I was scared of losing all of them but yet the truth would still be revealed in the end. I hesitated and all I could say was that I loved Merlin and I wanted him in my life again. He again pulled e into a hug and demanded that we return back inside, otherwise there was no way I'd win him over by just being too emotional. We strolled back into the hospital corridors all the way into his room. He was gone. "Damn it, he shouldn't be moving around in his state" cried Raj calling out even to the nurses who were in charge, but no one had seen him leave, he wasn't stupid after all he was by profession a doctor though quite a failure because of me I supposed.

He wanted to go see Rin, she was the only thing occupying his mind now, not even his daughter was. I wouldn't blame him after all she could be anyone's, but I was sure she was Merlin's. I even registered her last name as Zarilli, Merlin didn't know of this yet but I hoped he would accept it. After all Merlin had gone through with his parents at a young age, all the divorces, the moving on the cheating. He would most certainly be hurt by who I now was, but I was in no position to apologize, rather I wouldn't mind taking Melissa to him. "The black rose is someone who betrayed her love and friends and became a slut in a foreign country" I whispered as I sat quietly with Rajesh in the waiting room. He nodded as if I hadn't said anything serious, "Rajesh, didn't you hear what I said?" I had to ask. "I did, you don't need to explain further—is he having doubts about his kid?" he asked, rather seriously this time around. I didn't know what his reaction would be after meeting his child. I wasn't even sure he doubted or he simply didn't know his child. "I've never been with him in the last five years Raj, he doesn't know much about Melissa" I subtly uttered. I wasn't hoping for any sympathetic response whatsoever but I felt the need to come clean.

"Are you done confessing Natasha?" Raj demanded quite fiercely yet so peacefully. I shook my head. I'd only told him what I could and there was no way I'd be able to narrate all my misdeeds and serve them to him on a platter. "Do you wish to continue?" he asked again. I wasn't, so he suggested we take the kid to Merlin as he'd surely be at his house at night. We took a cab to Clarissa's hood to fetch my daughter. Clarissa could smile even though in turmoil. At times you'd wonder if that beam on her beautiful face was faked or she was simply hiding her sorrows or trying hard to forget them. In this particular case, I'd dropped a bomb on her without warning. She had to be depressed but she wasn't. I couldn't face her but before Raj and I left her house, she stood behind me and held my shoulder. I stood in shock. "Look at me Natasha" she demanded. I slowly turned my face to her; she was still smiling as if she'd been promised heaven. "I believe you" she whispered, and added "don't worry about not coming to my wedding, I hadn't invited you but I was wrong, I didn't know who the real snake in our story was—now I'll need your help bringing that man to his knees" she said  as her eyes started to water up.

I turned around to see confused Raj smiling, he shrugged at me and I smiled back, and then wrapped my arms around Clarissa. I was so glad she'd understood why I'd decided to drop that bomb on her. "They will pay for making our lives miserable, Rin, Aron, Mike and even Moana. That forced quite a startle all over my body as I wasn't expecting Moana to be part of these mentioned names. "Moana is your best friend, why?" I inquired. Apparently I knew nothing of their friendship over the last few years, many things may have changed but I was ignorant of it all. "Did you notice that I'd been wearing long sleeved clothing ever since we met last night?" she asked, I surely hadn't noticed this but she was right, though I did not quite see how relevant this was to anything because everyone does wear long sleeve even pajamas.

She slowly unbuttoned her shirt. I cleared my throat signaling that Raj was here, we could even do this in a private room. "Is he not a doctor?" she inquired, Raj smirked naughtily. "Ah he's a naughty one" she remarked. She took it off revealing a vertical scar stretching from below her breast to her waist line. I turned to Raj he was holding Melissa's face covering her eyes from witnessing what was right before us; the horror in his eyes was unbearable. She placed her shirt on the couch and stretched out her arm revealing yet another seemingly blade inflicted scar. I'm a good and naïve friend, that's why I've remained friends with her all along, but I suspect she's Aron's other family and they're living in Davenport, Iowa, she does visit her parents from time to time and Aron, he only comes in the month's last week. She was there at my wedding just before she decided to betray me. Moana almost killed me" she said. She held back her tears all that time. Finally, she volunteered to drive us to Merlin's place.

"Mike's dead you say?" She asked plainly. "Yeah" I nodded. She had gone through a lot for a woman who thought was in love with a perfect man. Her own best friend had dumped her ruthlessly for a man. This made my story seem like a match flame compared to hers. However I was in on the idea of making them pay for what they'd done to us. I had nothing on Moana but Rin had to let go of my man, I wasn't sure Clarissa wanted the same for Moana but it would be unlikely. We finally drove into Merlin's driveway after a few minutes. He seemed to be home. Clarissa and her kid stayed behind in the car as Raj and I went on to knock with Melissa and the hopes that he would accept his child if not me.