Adonis smiled. Perhaps, the devil had a tiny heart after all. She got a text from Gregory. She swallowed uneasily; she had been unconsciously avoiding him. The night they had slept together, her heart had raced, and her face had warmed from embarrassment. She had also felt a strong attraction to him.
She had promised her family that she wouldn't be gay anymore, so she had to tell Gregory that they could only be friends. Adonis was so immersed in her role, she sometimes got confused and thought she was truly gay for liking guys. Then she corrected herself and realized that if Gregory loved her; he loved a boy which she wasn't, so he didn't love her, he loved the guy version of her. The thought made her sad because she wouldn't mind having a relationship with Gregory. He was quiet and listened to her. And handsome. He was very handsome.
She checked the messages. Eight missed-calls over two days and many texts asking if she was ok, or if he had done something wrong. The latest text said: 'I'm outside.'
Her heart lurched. After having an internal debate about whether she should see him or not, she decided to go. She removed the bags of ice and stood. Her legs felt weird; she walked with her legs bowed. She felt like a crab. Every step brought her pain, but she left the room, grimacing and sidestepping down the stairs, staying quiet, so she didn't alert anyone. She crossed the front entrance, paused to straighten her posture, ignoring the pain in her legs and upper back.
She walked stiffly out the door, but she thought she looked more like a human now and less crablike. Gregory was waiting under the tree; the leaves' shadows danced across his pale skin. A smile warmed his face as he watched her. He greeted her with a hug and held her for a long time like he was embracing a long-lost brother.
Releasing her, he held her shoulder, keeping her at a distance to examine her. He said, "Your face lost some of its baby fat. It's leaner." He drew a line across her cheekbone then his hands went to her waist. His grip was firm, and though her shirt blocked his fingers, she could feel him through it. "Here too. Have you been working out?"
The fire started in her cheeks, then spread throughout her whole face and finally heated her ears. She forgot how to talk. She thought, 'This was why I have been avoiding him.'
He chuckled and pulled her into another hug; his muscular arms pinning her to him as he murmured next to her ear, "Don't just blush, say something."
She struggled to find her voice.
"Nothing to say?" he asked. "I'm kind of hurt; you have been avoiding me for a few days now." He held her chin, tilting her head back so she would stare at him.
She remembered how to speak again and said, "We're not supposed to do this."
"We are not doing anything," he said.
"It feels like we are doing something we shouldn't."
"It's your imagination."
Maybe she had imagined it. She frowned. Perhaps, he didn't feel attracted to her at all. The thought chilled her heart, and her embarrassment faded. It was all in her head. Guys got hard for a whole variety of reasons, so maybe that night hadn't meant anything to him, and she had taken it out of context.
"What are you thinking?" he asked, his hand falling to his side.
"Nothing."
"Why did you ignore me?"
She paused, choosing her words carefully. Since he didn't like her, she wouldn't like him either.
They were simply friends. "My father doesn't want me to flirt with boys, and I wasn't sure where you and I stood, but now I know."
"Where do we stand?" he asked. The hand that was still on her waist stroked her skin through the satin shirt. It was distracting; she removed it. His little gestures of affection meant nothing at all.
She said, "Friends. We are friends." Her voice was crisp and emotionless.
Gregory's smile faltered and faded. When it reappeared, it no longer reached his eyes. "Friends?" he asked. "I thought you were my other half. Brothers."
"That too," she said.
He kissed her cheek. "Are you alright?"
She wanted to get rid of him; her heart hurt every time he touched her. She said, "Yeah. Do you need anything?"
"Mhm. You're good at art, right?"
She nodded, but she was no longer interested in speaking to him.
"I need you to make a flyer."
"For what?"
"Asking for killing and rape to be banned in Relar."
She froze, taking in what he had asked her to do. Going against the government, no, going against Relar Corp was something people didn't do. You didn't question how they operated. You didn't ask them to change or fix something. And if you did, you were silenced. Your businesses blacklisted; your children kicked out of private schools. Your friends turned on you. Few people would take such a risk.
But Adonis knew how to hack various social media platforms without being caught, and she could create fake accounts and program a spam bot to send the flyer to a vast network of individuals. Eventually, the bot would get caught, but she could always make a new one. It was one of the useless skills she had picked up while avoiding school. She said, "Didn't your brother ask for the same thing before he died?"
"That's the thing. I don't think it was an accident. I think the game's moderators allowed the tsunami to happen on purpose. My brother and his friends had grown really popular during the time they had spent on the game. They had fans that would do anything they said. I think the game's moderators got rid of them before they became a bigger problem."
She bowed her head, thoughtfully. Fidel had said that Chris and his friends were plotting to kill the president and weren't people that should be followed. The whole thing felt wrong. No one who knew Chris in real life believed that story. The guy worked hard and studied hard. He was also kind. One day when someone had beaten Adonis for being gay; Chris had taken her off campus to buy candy. He did his best to cheer her up, making all kinds of exaggerated gestures to get her to laugh. He was only two years older than her, but he seemed wiser and happier. She liked the guy. She was sad that she would never see him again.
She said, "It might be something to look into. There's this discussion board I use sometimes, and one of the seniors, she's twenty-five years old or something, she works for Relar, I could ask her to look into it. Are you sure you want to know what really happened?"
She thought of herself. If Achilles had died, and someone told her that it was an accident, she would understand and eventually come to accept it. But if someone said he had been murdered, she was pretty sure she would be out there, trying to get revenge. Gregory had always been level-headed, but after Chris' death, he seemed unhinged. Not like himself. Even the way he touched her was more intimate than before, needier.
He said, "I need to know to be at peace."
Staring into his eyes, she knew that he had told the truth.
She asked, "You're not going to go all vigilante on me and try to kill Fidel, will you?"
He laughed. "No, no. I just want to know." Though he smiled, his eyes were rather cold. She decided to withhold the truth if his brother had been murdered, because something about the way he was looking at her filled her with fear. He had the dark, threatening gaze of a predator. Silence enveloped them then he said, "Can you give me this friend's contact info? I'll feel better if I talk to her myself."
"Okay."
"Can you do it now?" his tone was icy, hostile.
She took out her phone slowly. She considered sending him a fake number, but he would know that she had cheated him. She put it back into her pocket and said, "No."
A dark expression crossed his face, and he grabbed the neck of her shirt, pulling a button free from the sheer force. She felt fear. It ran through her entire being. He was bigger than her, stronger than her. She felt like a mouse, looking up at a giant. He could easily overpower her. She wished Cal was next to her. She knew Cal could stop him, but she was alone. Adonis stood her ground. "No." she repeated.
"Give. It. To. Me.'
She said, "No." Her voice was calmer than she felt.
He raised her off the ground and slammed her back into the tree. Pain erupted between her shoulder blades. She winced and grunted. He said, "He was my brother, damn it. I deserve to know if they killed him."
"I'm not going to let you risk your life."
"Then fuck you."
"Yeah, fuck me," she said.
He gritted his teeth, and held her pinned to the tree. Warm air blew out of his nostrils as he lowered her to the ground. He punched the spot above her head. She flinched and closed her eyes. When she opened her eyes, he was retreating towards his hoverbike, the same tight expression on his face. He straddled the seat, flipped the key into the ignition and sped off.
Adonis released a shaky breath. Her shoulders slumped, and she sat on the grass, listening to him flee the residence.
She had never seen this side of him before, and it terrified her. Jonas had been right; she should have given him space to heal. She should have ignored the temptation to see him. She sat there for what felt like an eternity before returning to her room, dazed and disillusioned. She sat by her study desk. There was a screen mounted to the wall. She turned it on and opened Photoshop.
She created a powerful anti-murder poster. She had chosen the image carefully from one of the previous Relar games. A boy wearing camouflage pointed the gun at the head of a boy kneeling with his hands on his head. She captioned it: 'These could be your children. Want it to stop? Put your voice out there and ask the government to pass a bill that bans killing and rape in Relar. The quests are dangerous enough; they shouldn't have to worry about someone trying to kill them.' She sent a copy to Gregory anonymously and then worked on creating a program that would spam message various accounts on the Canadian social media network, Frameus. Her tongue stuck out as she concentrated on her work. Time passed without her knowing. By the time she was done, the sun had set, and it was time for bed. She stretched her fingers and congratulated herself. All she could do now was wait. But she had repaid Chris for the times he had helped her out.
***