'Xena...'
The whisper of my name echoed in my subconsciousness.
'Xena...'
It brought me back to earth. It brought me back to reality. I became aware of my surroundings.
'Xena...'
I was laying on the sandy soil of the playground. I knew it was the playground because it was the same place I had blacked out from.
'Xena...'
There was light shining brightly on my face. I could feel the heat of the light radiating on my skin. From this heat, I knew immediately that it was the sun; even though my eyes were still shut.
Suddenly, a shadow befell my face; blocking the light from showering its glory upon me.
"Xena...." the shadow called.
That voice... It sounded too familiar.
Mom!
At the recognition of my mom's voice, my eyes flew open. I saw her face staring down at me from a standing position. Suddenly, she was gone.
Gone like she never existed.
The moment she moved away, sunlight from above; hit my eyes. The light was blinding and it made my eyes water. I squeezed my eyes shut and shielded them with my left hand; as I struggled to get on my feet.
I stood up with high hopes and a smile was already pasted on my face.
Mom is here. She's come for me. Everything was going to be okay now.
I was safe.
But I was met with disappointment. Mom was gone.
There was no sign of her.
I stared around with wide eyes, searching frantically around for her. My breathing quickened as always. My nerves were getting to me.
Maybe I imagined it?
I could have sworn that the person I saw and heard was my mom.
"Mom!" I screamed, hoping to get an answer from her.
I turned around and searched on all sides for her, hoping to catch even a strand of her hair; but there was nothing to confirm her existence.
"Mom! Where are you?" I called out in desperation.
Please mom, please.
I stared around with pleading eyes. The rising hope within me had started to drown. The light that had started to shine within me had started to darken.
Unshed tears filled my eyes. I was on the brink of breaking down again.
There!
I caught her backside as she maneuvered her way through the tree section of The Aromes Park.
"Mom!" I called with joy and wasted no time running after her.
I ran as fast as I could, afraid that I would lose her if I wasn't fast enough.
"Mom! Wait up!" I called after her.
She didn't stop. She kept on moving, overly focused on her destination.
I maneuvered my way through the trees as I ran after her. I kept my eyes on her, I didn't even dare blink. I was afraid if I did, then I would lose sight of her.
Due to the fact that I was determined to keep my eyes on her, I didn't see the fallen tree log before me. By the time I did, it was already too late.
I hit it and fell.
"Ah!" I let out a strangled scream at the impact and I watched myself helplessly as the ground got closer to my face.
I fell on my elbows in an attempt to protect my face. This earned me bruises.
I moaned in pain and wanted to lay there and sulk but I remembered the task at hand.
Mom!
The thought of her gave me the courage to get on my feet instantly. My fear finally manifested itself when I searched for her.
I lost her!
I wanted to descend to the ground and start wailing like a widow.
Don't lose hope, Xena. She's probably up ahead. All I had to do was track her down.
A new hope rekindled in me and I continued my task of catching up with her.
I swiftly moved through the trees and found myself exiting Aromes Park. I stood with my back to the park and waited; hoping to find a clue that would show me which way she went.
Suddenly, a strong wind blew past me; making my messed up curls fly around.
The wind didn't come alone. It carried a name. It carried my name.
"Xena..."
"Mom?" I called, wanting to believe it was her. It had to be her. There was no one else with me but her.
The whisper came from my east side, towards the residential homes. I followed it and continued the search for my mom.
It has to be my mom. Who else could it be if not her?
Uncertainty was gnawing at me but I chose to ignore it and push it away from my thoughts. I wasn't going to let my cowardly nature stop me from finding my mom and asking her to explain exactly what was going on, on this island.
"Mom?" I tried calling again, hoping that I would at least get a response.
There!
I caught sight of her, taking a turn down the next street.
"Mom! Wait up! We need to talk!" I screamed but that didn't stop her from being on the move.
I ran after her.
It took me a minute to get to the end of the road but that minute felt like an eternity. I was sweating all over and breathing heavily.
I shouldn't have been skipping gym class in school. Now I know its importance.
I finally made the turn, hoping to find her there but there was no sign of her existence.
"Mom! Where are you? Why are you playing these silly tricks on me?" I called out. I was becoming frustrated with the silly game of hiding and seek that my mom was playing on me.
"Xena..." Another whisper of my name got to my ears.
I turned on impulse, hoping to find her behind me.
Nothing.
No one.
"Xena..." She called again.
This time, it came from my left. I turned to my left but there was no one there.
"Mom! Where are you?" I asked out loud but only silence answered me.
"Xena... Xena... Xena." The whispers danced in my ears.
I turned hysterically around. I searched with my eyes. I searched with my ears but I couldn't find the one whispering my name.
"Xena!!"
The whispers got louder, more demanding, and eerie.
I threw my hands over my ears in other to block out the sounds but I could still hear them.
"Xena!!"
I started retreating backward to slowly escape from the whispers unnoticed.
"Xena... Xena... Xena."
That was when I tripped!
"Ah!" I screamed as I landed on my back.
The action hurt my backbones. I groaned and rolled in pain. I wanted to cry again due to the pain. The fall was too hard for me to bear.
Suddenly, as I rolled to my left side; I spotted my mom. She was laying on the ground and her back was rested on the wall for support.
The sight of her gave me the strength I needed to get on my feet. I forgot the pain in my backbone.
"Mom?" I called as I slowly approached her.
Fear was beginning to eat at me. For some reason, my mom wasn't moving and I was scared to approach her.
What if like Kelvin and Dad, she turns up dead?
No! She can't be dead. I just saw her and I followed her here. She whispered my name. She did, I saw her.
My fingers went cold and they started to tremble.
She's fine Xena. There's no need to worry. I was just overreacting.
Anxiety took over my emotions and I found it hard to move my legs forward. Somehow, they became too heavy.
I shut my eyes and took in a deep breath.
It's time to woman up.
I opened my eyes and took the brave first step toward my unmoving mom.
"Mom?" I tried again but there was no answer.
The moment I got close enough, my fear was confirmed.