When I reached the house, I paused at the door and looked up.
The two-story stone house seemed not to loom over me, but to lean back, expectant. The welcome was there, but muted, waiting for me to make the first move. So very much like its owner.
I touched one of the cool stones and felt a rush of memory leap out to greet me.
Pulling away, I flung open the door, threw my overnight bag to the floor, and headed for the study, expecting to find Jeremy reading by the fireplace. He was always there when I came home, not waiting at the gate like Clay, but waiting nonetheless.
The room was empty. A folded copy of Milan's daily paper Corriere Della Sera lay beside Jeremy's chair. Stacks of Clay's anthropology magazines and research publications covered the couch and desk.
The main phone rested on the desk and appeared to be intact and plugged in.
"I called," I said. "Why wasn't anyone here?"
"We were here," Clay said. "Around, anyway. You should have left a message."
"I did. Two hours ago."
"Well, that explains it. I've been out by the gate all day waiting for you, and you know Jeremy never checks the machine.
I didn't ask how Clay knew I was coming back today when I hadn't left a message. Nor did I question why he'd spent the entire day sitting at the gate.
Clay's behavior couldn't be measured by human standards of normalcy. . . or by any standards of normalcy at all.
"So where is he?" I asked.
"Dunno. I have not seen him since he brought out my dinner a few hours ago. He must have gone out."
I did not need to check the garage for Jeremy's car to know Clay did not mean he had gone out in the usual sense.
Common human phrases took on new meanings at Stonehaven. Going out meant he had gone for a run—and that did not mean he had gone jogging.
Did Jeremy expect me to fly all the way here, then wait at his convenience? Of course, he did.
Was it punishment for ignoring his summons? Part of me wished I could accuse him of that, but Jeremy was never petty.
If he had planned a run for tonight, he'd have gone, regardless of whether I was coming or not.
A sliver of hurt ran through my anger, but I tried to disown it. Did I expect Jeremy to be waiting for me like Clay? Of course not. Did not expect it and did not care about it. I was pissed off, nothing more.
Two could play this game. Jeremy valued his privacy when he ran. So what was I going to do? Invade that privacy, of course. Jeremy may never be petty, but I sure as hell could be.
"Out?" I said. "Well then, I will just have to find him."
I swerved to pass Clay, heading for the door. He stepped in front of me. "He will be back soon. Sit down and we will—"
I sidestepped Clay on my way to the rear hall and the half-open back door. Clay followed at my heels, keeping pace a step behind.
I walked through the walled garden to the path leading into the forest. The wood-chip path crunched underfoot.
From beyond, the night smells began to sift in; burning leaves, distant cattle, wet soil—myriad inviting scents. Somewhere in the distance, a mouse shrieked as an owl snatched it from the forest floor.
I kept walking. Within fifty feet the trail dwindled to a thin path of trodden grass, then disappeared into the undergrowth. I paused and sniffed the air. Nothing—No scent, no sound, no sign of Jeremy.
At that moment, I realized I heard no sound at all, not even the clomp of Clay's footsteps behind me. I turned and saw only trees.
"Clayton!" I shouted.
A moment later the reply came back in a crashing of distant bushes. He was off to warn Jeremy.
I slammed my hand into the nearest tree trunk. Had I expected Clay to let me intrude on Jeremy's privacy that easily? If so, I had forgotten a few things in the past year.
I pushed through the trees. Twigs lashed at my face and vines grabbed my feet. I stumbled forward, feeling huge, clumsy, and most unwelcome out here.
The path was not made for people. I did not stand a chance of heading off Clay like this, so I found a clearing and prepared for the Change.
My Change was rushed, making it awkward and torturous and afterward, I had to rest, panting on the ground.
As I got to my feet, I closed my eyes and inhaled the smell of Stonehaven. A shiver of elation started in my paws, raced up my legs, and quivered through my entire body. In its wake, it left an indescribable blend of excitement and calm that made me want to tear through the forest and collapse in blissful peace at the same time.
I was home. As a human, I could deny that Stonehaven was my home, that the people here were my Pack, and that the woods here were anything more than a patch of someone else's land.
But as a wolf in Stonehaven's forest, one chorus trumpeted through my head. This forest was mine. It was Pack territory and therefore it was mine. Mine to run in and hunt in and play in without fear of partying teenagers, overeager hunters, or rabid foxes and raccoons.
No discarded sofas to block my path, no rusty cans to slice open my paws, no stinking garbage bags to foul the air I breathed, or dumped chemicals to pollute the water I drank.
This was not some patch of woods claimed for an hour or two. This was five hundred acres of forest, every acre crisscrossed with familiar paths and stocked with rabbits and deer, a smorgasbord supplied for my pleasure.
My pleasure. I downed huge gulps of air. Mine. I darted out of the thicket to the well-worn path. Mine. I rubbed against an oak tree, feeling the bark scratch and pull away tickling clumps of dead fur. Mine. The ground shuddered in three low vibrations—a rabbit thumping somewhere to my left. Mine. My legs ached to run, to rediscover the intricate world of my forest.
Somewhere deep in my brain, a tiny human voice shouted No, no, no! This is not yours. You gave it up. You do not want it! I ignored it.