I was sitting in the garden after the meals with my father while gazing at the night sky.
"You found the job?"
"There are about three possible options. I would check them out tomorrow."
"And why are you looking for the part time job?"
"There will be some event at the end of this month at the Village of Fate and I wanted money for it."
I am surprised that I can interact naturally with my father. The words are automatically coming out of my mouth.
"Oh so it would be tomorrow."
Does my father believe it?
I wonder if I heard it clearly.
"Did you have any problems?"
"No, I think I'll do my best with whatever job I get but I think it's impossible for me to serve customers. The convenient stores hence will be inconvenient for me. So I'm looking for some physical labor. Let's see what I can find"
"I see. If you are passionate about it then you can ask someone for help."
I will be grateful, but if I rely on someone and fail disappointing my father again.....
"Yoshio, I'm your father no matter the situation. It's not embarrassing for a child to rely his father. It's different from dependence and spoilage. You should use everything you can, including your adults. "
This is just my intuition but I think my father is suggesting me to rely on him.
I can imagine Lodis working and looking over to her daughter while her daughter Carol is trying to do everything by herself. His behavior is clearly indicating for Carol to rely on him instead of doing the work herself.
Carol situation overlaps with my current situation.
"Ok. Please help me."
How many years has it been since I bowed to my father like this?
"Wait a minute"
Dad got up to throw out the garbage and then went back to the living room.
This is my escape route.
I can't betray my father's expectations again. My heartbeats have accelerated and my shirt has stuck to my skin due to sweat.
I am really upset that I am not working.
"Yoshio, can you change into more comfortable clothes?"
My father who has finished his work asked me that.
"Yeah, I have a few jerseys."
"That's fine. Change your clothes and come out."
Maybe he found a job for me.
"Oh, and I haven't written my resume yet."
"No problem."
Is it an interview? It maybe something worth a try.
I went back to my room to change into a more comfortable jersey.
My hands are trembling. I'm still angry with myself who isnt ready to face this situation.
Did the feeling of wanting to change while crying was a lie?
Am I ready for this?
When I looked at the screen of the PC, Chem and Gamz were checking out the fence around the cave.
Carol is sleeping while Layla is checking out food, and Lodis is inspecting the tools in the cave.
They are worshiping a God who doesn't work.
As a God of Destiny, I can't afford to slack off.
... Thank you, I got courage because of you all.
I hit my cheeks lightly with my hands.
"Yoshio is going now everyone."
I finished changing the clothes and closed the doors.