"We really can't thank you enough for everything Jekia." Sean was saying as we stood near the gateway.
It was a few hours later, and the four of us were prepared to go home now. I kept glancing at the baby boy sleeping on my shoulder, still bundled in the soft white blanket. Lana had gifted it to me for him, and I in turn had promised her that I'd come back with him when he was older so that she and Jekia could see him.
I admit that I was feeling shaky mentally, but was doing my best to hold myself together. If anything, I'd do that for my son. I could always fall apart in private later.
"There's no need for such." Jekia told him. He looked at Michael and Raphael as he continued, "As I stated before, I have no issue in working with the Nephilim families, and neither do the others who rule beside me. I also prefer this for the child, although I do wish that we could have returned the mother as well. But unfortunately, such is out of my power."
"I'd imagine it would be out of most of ours, no matter how much we wish it wasn't." Raphael lamented.
Jekia nodded, then seemed to remember something. He reached into his pocket, pulling out a silver chain with a deep blue oval pendant hanging from it.
"Also, since we have this chance, I wish to give this back to you." he told Sean.
Sean looked shocked as he took the chain and pendant from him. He obviously recognized it.
"You've had this all this time?" he asked him.
"No." Jekia shook his head, "It was stolen right before Sage died by the Lycans, and I've only recently been able to retrieve it. While I had planned to personally deliver it to your mother, I feel now that it's better for me to give it to you instead. You may give it to her if you wish, along with my continued condolences."
I could tell that Sean was emotional as he looked at this pendant, but he held it in, doing his best to act normal.
"Thank you." he breathed, taking a minute to pull himself together before continuing, "We appreciate everything you've done for us, and if we can ever return the favor, please let us know."
Jekia nodded, a pleasant smile crossing his face, "Yes, I know you would, but it is I who is in your debt for what your father did. Let us simply look at this as a friendship, if you would agree."
Sean returned that smile, shaking his hand, "Of course."
I shifted the baby against my shoulder, letting out a quiet sigh. I should probably say something too before we left.
"Hey," I spoke up, "I wanted to say thanks for all of this too. You saved my son's life, and I can't thank you enough for that."
"There is no need. I would have done so regardless, though I do now hope for the chance to know you and your sister eventually. The idea of knowing Sage's descendants at least brings a bit of comfort for Lana and I." Jekia admitted.
"As does the idea of this alliance for us." Raphael added, "However, it's a little disheartening that you can't tell us anymore about what occurred with our family in the beginning."
"I understand, but I'm afraid my tongue to bound to what they tell me I may or may not say. However, I can give you a word of advice concerning such things as well. To help fight against this curse that this Fallen has laid, you must also look to the past." Jekia informed us.
"Look to the past?" I repeated, looking at my grandfather and uncle.
While Raphael remained stoic about this, Michael looked a little startled. But he didn't say anymore to it, only agreeing to take his advice.
It was shortly after this conversation when we went through the gateway and reentered our world. Everything was just like when we'd left, except that the sun was starting to go down. I stayed quiet as I followed my family out of the woods, still looking at the sleeping baby against me. Reality was sinking in hard, and all I wanted to do was get home and deal with it however I could.
Sean looked at me as we got into his Jeep. While no one had pushed me to say anything before now, he wasn't going to overlook my silence since it was just the two of us.
"I know you're not okay Sevee, but is there something I can do to help you?" he asked me quietly.
I managed to shake my head, "I... I'm not sure of anything right now." I confessed.
"I get it." Sean reached over and placed a firm hand on my shoulder, "We're not that far from home, so just hold on to the baby while I get us there. We can take care of him once we're inside. He probably does need to be changed and fed."
"I don't know if I can do this Dad. I never thought I'd have to do this without her." I managed to choke out.
Sean continued to hold my shoulder, "I know, and it'll be okay. It hurts right now, but I know that you're strong, and you'll make it through this. Just let us help you."
"Yeah." I whispered.
Everything fell into a kind of haze after that. I can barely remember anything that happened during that time. I know that we made it home, and Mia had come outside as soon as we got there. I thought she'd opened the door and coaxed the baby from me, and I did go inside with them. There was a flurry of activity with my son as I remained standing back, and somehow, I'd ended up going up to my room and falling out on my bed.
The next real thing I registered was opening my eyes in what felt like a dream. I was lying in a field, and sitting up, I saw that it was much like that dream that I'd had of Elvira. The farmhouse was about twenty feet away, and I could see the gravel driveway nearby.
I looked around me, taking in the serene feel of the breeze that floated through the warm air. It was gentle, relaxing; like being in Heaven.
Was I?
Had I willed myself to die with Lenore?
"You're so silly Sevee. Of course you're not dead. You'd be breaking your promise, remember?"
My body spun around as I heard the familiar voice, my eyes locking on the beautiful figure standing just feet from me. There was a bright smile on Lenore's face as she saw me, her long white hair flowing around her in the breeze. She looked so much like when we'd first met, although her dress was now white and sleeveless, with a skirt that came down to her knees.
"Lenore..." I whispered.
She giggled at me, "I'd say this isn't like you, but I think I get it. Yeah, it's really me." she assured me.
I scurried up to my feet, running over and hugging her tightly. I wanted to cry, but no tears would come out. There was only the sweeping relief of holding her, even if in my mind, I knew that this was just a dream, and she wouldn't be there when I woke up.
Lenore hugged me back, gently running a hand through my hair, "Oh Sevee, it's okay. I'm so sorry. I know this hurt you so bad." she whispered.
"No kidding." I breathed, "I don't think I've ever hurt like this in my life."
"At the risk of sounding awful right now, that does make me feel better. You really do love me like I love you. That makes me so happy." Lenore responded. She pulled back from me a little, holding my face, "Everything will be alright. This isn't forever Sevee. He promised me that, and he's also promising you."
I looked around us, taking in where we were. I was sure this was the same place that I'd met Elvira. This person Lenore was talking about, could he have been...?
"Are you talking about our Angel? Have you met him?" I pressed her.
Lenore smiled, "Yes. He was there when I died as an Astarte, and he took me instead of letting them send me back to the Hell I was supposed to go to. That's why I know this won't be forever. I'm going to see you again one day Sevee; you and our son."
Relief swept through me as I heard this.
"But when? When will we get to see you again?"
"I don't know yet. It could be a while." Lenore confessed. She held my hands in hers, "But I know you'll be okay until I do, and I know you'll take good care of our baby boy. You and our family."
"I promise I will. I'll pull myself together and make sure that he's never without me, and that he'll never have to feel like I did before I met you. I'll also make sure he knows all about you and how much you love him, and that he'll get to see you one day too." I swore to her.
Lenore nodded, and I saw tears in her eyes, which began falling over her pale cheeks, "I really am sorry I left you and him like this. I wanted to stay with you and have our family."
"It's okay. At least you'll come back to us one day. That's enough for me, and I'm sure it'll be enough for him." I told her.
"Yes." She let me run my hands over her moist cheeks, "Have you named him yet? You never told me what you wanted to name him before all of this."
I shook my head, "No, actually I haven't. But since you're here with me, why don't you tell me what you want to name him? You are his mom."
Lenore looked surprised, but a happy smile quickly replaced that.
"Well, I was thinking that I'd like to name him after some of your family. I wanted to call him Michael Sage if he was a boy."
I wasn't that surprised to hear her say this. She'd always been fascinated about Sage, and she had really gotten close to my grandfather Michael. He'd treated her like a second granddaughter. But I also really liked the idea.
"I like that, and if it's what you want, then that's his name."
"Yes." Lenore agreed. She glanced around us as the sky began getting lighter, "I guess I don't have any more time left, but I'm so glad that I got to see you again Sevee. Please, take care of yourself and our son. I love you."
"I love you too." I shared one last long kiss with her, "Always."
The next thing I knew, I was waking up from that dream. It took a minute for my eyes to adjust, and the sight of my bedroom greeted me. I slowly sat up, rubbing my head as I tried to bring my mind back to reality. I swore I could still smell Lenore's sweet scent lingering in the air. That brought a sad smile to my face, and I had to look down as a mix of sorrow and elation filled me. She'd really been there. I really had been able to say goodbye to her, at least for now.
I finally raised my head and took in the sight of sunlight shining outside of my windows. My nearby desk clock read that it was about one in the afternoon. Damn, how long had I been out? I hoped not too crazy long. I needed to keep my promise to Lenore and take care of our son. Seeing the empty crib near me, I betted he was downstairs with my family, more than likely my mother.
I slid off my bed and opened my door, hearing muffled voices downstairs. As I suspected, Mia was down there. It sounded like Sara was too. I sniffed the air, trying to discern who else might've been. It seemed like Seraphina was there, but that was it. I wondered where my dad had gone.
After going to the bathroom to change and clean up, I pulled myself together and headed downstairs. Hopefully they wouldn't be too worried seeing me looking more like myself.
The three were sitting in the den as I came down, and as I suspected, they had my son with them. Seraphina was currently holding him, looking like the happiest girl in the world. He was looking up at her, apparently wide awake.
Mia stood up as she saw me, coming over to me.
"Oh good. You're finally awake." She breathed a sigh of relief, "Are you feeling any better?"
"I think so. Sorry if I scared you. I kind of went on overload for a while there." I apologized.
"Trust me, we get it. You've been through a lot, and losing Lenore like this had to be incredibly hard on you." Mia reasoned.
"Um, how long was I out of it?" I had to know.
Mia caught onto my uneasiness, "It's only been about a day, so don't worry too much about it." she assured me. She turned and smiled towards the living room, "Come on and join us. I'm sure you want to see your son now that you're fully back."
A smile crossed my face, "No kidding. I feel like I barely saw him at all."
I followed her into the room, where I was able to sit beside Seraphina on the couch. She grinned as she handed the baby to me.
I admit that there were a lot of emotions running through me as I looked at him with a clearer mind. I never thought I could feel love like I did at that moment. This precious little boy was mine. Even if he'd been the last thing I'd been expecting when Lenore and I met, I was incredibly grateful now that he was here.
He looked a lot like Lenore as I took in his appearance. He had some white hair just like hers, although his eyes were already green like mine. I noted that he still had the fox ears too. He stared back at me calmly, like he already knew who I was. I halfway wondered if he knew my scent instinctively, just like I'd known his.
"He's such a cute little baby boy. It makes me miss when Sean was that tiny." Sara commented. She was sitting on the nearby loveseat with my mother, smiling happily at us.
"He's absolutely adorable, and so sweet and calm." Mia added. She then looked at Sara, "Out of curiosity though, what should we do about his ears and tail now? Will he be able to hide them when he gets older?"
"I'm not sure. He may end up needing a limiter at least for a while. But I guess this answers the question about which bloodline will be more dominant in him. Maybe it even has to do with him being a male. It does seem like Sevee inherited the Fox side more than Seraphina." Sara noted.
"True, although I wonder if some of that also had to do with Lenore being an Astarte." Mia responded.
Seraphina sat back with me as I continued holding the baby, gently stroking one of his ears.
"He's cute, isn't he?" I commented to her.
Seraphina nodded, still smiling at him. I felt some relief seeing her like this too. She looked genuinely happy, like she was basking in the glow of being an aunt.
"Have you thought of a name for him Sevee?" Sara asked me.
"Yeah. Actually, Lenore and I talked about it. We'd said that we wanted to name him Michael Sage if he was a boy, and we could just call him Sage." I answered.
"That's pretty unique." Mia commented, looking like she was appreciating that aspect of it.
"I really like it. It feels like it fits him to me." Sara added.
I saw Seraphina nodding in agreement with her. Looking back at Sage, I thought about what they'd been saying again. More of the fox traits and possibly needing a limiter.
"Hey Mom, does he really also have a tail?" I asked her.
"Yes. It seems like he was born with his ears and tail." Mia confirmed.
I was half tempted to take him out of his blanket to look, but thought twice. He looked so content right now that I didn't want to upset him. Besides, I could always look later. I was sure I'd be changing his diapers and cleaning him up a lot. But that brought another thought to my mind.
"Okay, I have to ask, how does the tail think work with a diaper?" I asked them.
Sara winked at me, "There's always tricks to those things."
Seraphina gently touched my face, running her hand over my cheek as I looked at her again. I could see the worry reflected in her eyes. She was still concerned about how I was taking all of this.
I flashed her a reassuring smile, "I'm okay now. I promise. It was just rough for a little bit, but I'm back to being me again."
She sighed, laying her head on my shoulder. I felt a little bad now. She'd been worrying a lot about me. She always did stuff like this when she was anxious. It was like being close to me made her feel more secure.
Mia didn't look surprised at all, and neither did Sara.
"She really was worried too. We all were. We know how rough it was on you to lose Lenore like that, and I'm sure it's been overwhelming for you to think about raising Sage without her." Mia admitted.
I let out a long breath as I watched Sage close his eyes, snuggling with his blanket again, "Yeah, it is. But I don't feel as overwhelmed now, and I feel like I will see her again one day. Besides, I know I have a family here that will help me and Sage as we need it too."
"Of course we will. We never abandon each other, no matter what." Mia reminded me.
Her words stuck with me as the day wore on. Sitting alone with Sage later that evening, I reflected on them. He was just finishing a bottle that I'd made for him, and we were enjoying our alone time now. I did feel a little more secure with taking care of him too. Mia and Sara had taught me a lot in those first few hours, although I admit that I'd never pictured myself fixing bottles and changing diapers until now.
But I'd also never pictured myself being a dad before I turned sixteen either.
My dream of Lenore was also echoing through my mind. Would I really see her again soon? What did that Angel have planned with all of that?
My attention was drawn back by the sound of Sage sucking the last bits from his bottle.
"Hey, I think you're done." I said quietly as I pulled it away from him. He fussed some when I did, but I just moved him against my shoulder, patting his back, "You don't need to make your belly ache. It was all gone buddy."
He snuggled against me after burping, and I sat back in the chair with him, closing my eyes and enjoying this now. Yeah, I could get used to this dad thing. Even if it did get hard at times, I was sure it would be worth it.
I heard footsteps coming into the room after a few minutes of us sitting there, and opened my eyes to see that it was my dad. He flashed me a smile as we caught eyes.
"Looks like you're finally back." I commented, keeping my voice lower so that I didn't wake Sage, who had just fallen asleep against me.
"Sorry about that. I wanted to look into something for myself, so I went back to the other side to talk to Musket and Tico about it." Sean responded. He sat down on the couch near me, "I am relieved to see you up now too. I was starting to get very worried."
"I know, and I'm sorry. I told Mom that too. I guess everything got to me and I needed time to process it in my own way, but I'm good now. I feel a lot better." I assured him.
"I understand. It's been quite a whirlwind in the last few months, and none of us wished for this outcome to things, although we're grateful that Sage is alive and well." Sean admitted.
"Sounds like Mom told you his name." I noted.
"She did, and I do like it. I agree that it fits him very well."
"You're not upset that he doesn't have your name?"
No, I hadn't thought about that one until now. But I'd been pretty focused on honoring what Lenore had wanted.
"Why would I be? When I came to this world with your grandmother, she listed my middle name as Sage as well." Sean informed me.
I didn't know that. Guess I probably should've asked a long time ago, but it never crossed my mind to ask if he had a middle name.
"I guess we did keep family names then." I relented. I decided to change the subject a little, "So, what were you talking to Musket and Tico about? Was it about that Fox, Anari?"
Sean nodded, "Yes. I was curious as to what became of him. While Jekia did mention that he dealt with him, I wasn't certain if he'd killed him when he'd found him with the baby or simply imprisoned him. While he's not typically one for imprisoning creatures, I wouldn't put it past him with this Fox creating Astartes. He might have even been of interest to the Higher Ones for what he was doing." he explained to me.
Those were really valid points. Now he had me curious too.
"What did you find out? Did they know anything about it?"
"According to Musket, Anari is dead. Jekia did kill him when he found him with Sage. It seems that his killing those Astartes as he did along with attempting to kill the baby enraged Jekia, and he killed him in retalition for his actions."
"Can't say it surprises me." I muttered.
No, I didn't feel much if any sympathy for that Fox. From the way Lenore had described things to me after we'd first met, he'd made the lives of his Astartes miserable. This was probably long overdue retribution.
"All that aside Sevee," Sean continued, "I am glad to see how well you've done already in taking care of Sage. It's not easy being a father, especially when you're this young."
"I know, and I get it now." I thought about my words carefully before continuing, "For what it's worth, I'm sorry too. I guess I've always looked at a lot of things selfishly. I always kept thinking that this life was such a waste of time because it seemed too good, even with the nightmares Missy used to give me. I wish I could take that back now. I'm glad I have Sage, but it feels like I lost so much other stuff. Not only did Lenore die, but Seraphina lost her voice, and Noah lost his wing. I wish I could go back and warn myself about all that stuff before it ended up happening, and tell myself how stupid I was being."
Sean was understanding as I said this, clasping his hands together in his lap as he leaned forward a little towards me.
"We all have things we regret in our lives Sevee. I told you that before, and I meant every word of it. None of us will ever be perfect, and we'll all make mistakes and believe things at times that we shouldn't. What matters is how we grow from it. That's what I've learned. I've lived with guilt for nearly twenty years over things that happened in the past, but I'm learning now that I have to let go of them, and all of my guilt won't change what's already done. I think you will too, even if it takes a little more time."
I looked back at Sage, who was now completely asleep against me, and a sense of pride filled me. He was right. I couldn't change the past, but I could learn from it and make a better future.
"You know Dad, I hope I can be like you one day." I stated as I looked at him again.
"Why do you say that?" Sean asked me.
"Because you've always understood me. You and Mom both. No matter what I've done or how stupid I've acted, you've always stood by me and helped me however you could. It means a lot to me, and I hope I can do that for Sage as he grows up too." I explained.
Sean looked away, but I could tell that my words got to him. He probably never expected me to say those things, at least not out loud. But I meant them too. I was proud that he was my dad, and I hoped that we could get along better now.
"I'm glad to hear you say that, and your mother and I will continue standing by you and Seraphina, no matter what comes. That's what it mean to be a parent, but I think you've already figured that out." he finally said.
"Yeah, you're right."
I slowly got up with Sage, and let Sean take him from me as he stood. I halfway wondered how much time he'd gotten with him since we'd come home. Probably not that much yet with him going back to check on things with that other Fox.
"I admit that this does bring back memories." Sean chuckled as he held his sleeping grandson against his shoulder. Sage cuddled against him, his ears twitching a little.
"I guess fifteen years did fly by, huh?" I noted.
"Unfortunately time always does." Sean agreed.
I glanced at the nearby windows, taking in the darkness setting in outside. A slight chill went through me as I remembered Noah's words from the den and my visions.
"Hey Dad, do you think this curse is anywhere near done with us?" I had to ask.
Sean shook his head, "I don't know. There's still lingering issues with Noah that only seem to be getting worse. I just hope that Jekia was right about that Angel intervening to finish things soon."
"Yeah, me too."
I guess in the end, none of us really knew what our futures held. With that curse still lingering around the Renaldi family, especially Noah, we knew that our hard times might have been far from over. But I also knew that I was determined to keep going forward.
Not only for me, but for my son.