"It's because I don't even trust myself that I won't hurt or kill people."
Lilith found it heartbreaking to hear that from the Grim Reaper. She couldn't help but want to reach out to him and hug him... but somehow, she felt that she had to hold back.
If Amon is avoiding her from the start for him to protect her, if she only met Amon now and that they're not really close with each other, how could she comfort him?
Is her presence enough? Is her not talking and only listening to him enough?
"Amon..."
Lilith hesitantly tugged on his cape. It made Amon's body stiffen slightly as he is not familiar with physical touch with someone, especially of the opposite gender.
"You sound... sad."
Neither one of them spoke another word. With Lilith still holding his cape and with Amon still standing still from where he is, a few seconds had passed, only their breaths heard and the ticking of the clock.
Lilith took this opportunity to get closer to him as she took another step towards Amon. He flinched, but he didn't move away, wanting to see what Lilith couldn possibly be doing.
"It's lonely for you, isn't it?" Lilith asked, this time, her time to speak. "You always hold yourself back because you want to protect the people around you. You wanted to maybe reach out or initiate talks or contact, but you're always so cautious."
Amon kept silent. With just a single nod coming from him, he felt tears pooling in his eyes as Lilith amazingly understood him even though he only spoke to her about the important details of his power.
"You kept it all in--you did your best, didn't you?" Lilith's graps on his cape tightened. "You're an immortal and it's sad that you lived long, knowing that you only have a few connections."
"Lilith--"
"You don't want to form bonds, either," she interrupted, her words further gnawing on the Grim Reaper's heart. "I think you feel that the more you bond with people, the more painful it is to get close to them because you might hurt them. Is it right?"
"You..."
Amon didn't even expect it, but a single tear escaped his eye. With it being visible to Lilith, it surprised her, making her heart ache as it was the first time for her to see the Grim Reaper this vulnerable.
They only met now, yes. They are not close with each other, that fact is true...
But still, they bonded together as if they kenw each other for such a long time with how accurately Lilith understood him.
Lilith is way younger than Amon. Heck, the Grim Reaper took her in as she was still an infant!
With this fact, it amazed both of them how she was able to discern the feelings and emotions of Amon.
Is it really possible?
"You don't have to push people away, Amon," Lilith said, tugging on to his cape to get his attention. "You don't have to act strong all the time. Doesn't it make you more heavy to act that way?"
"I can't help it," Amon answered, another tear escaping his eye. "I just... I don't want to get close to people. I don't want to--"
"You don't want to hurt them... yes..." Lilith interrupted, her next words making the Grim Reaper's heart ache more. "But don't you think that the way you coldly act towards them by pushing them away, subtly hurts them, too?"
Amon didn't look at their side this way. He always knew that by acting harsh and by distancing himself, he would protect them.
It never crossed his mind that by doing so, their pure and gentle intention of being close with him would be painful once he showed immediate rejection.
He didn't mean to hurt them. He just wanted to keep them safe.
"It is not my intention," Amon said, his voice smaller, no longer sounding confident. "They are the people who raised me and I only have a few friends. I have to protect with what little I have."
"Yes, I know," Lilith agreed, now taking more steps toward him so they could be closer. "But you don't have to push them away every time. They understand you, right?"
"They do."
"Then open up to them, too." Lilith smiled, hoping that even though she is a pain in the Grim Reaper's eyes, that she had comforted him at the slightest. "They would appreciate that. I know they will."
"Lilith..."
The Grim Reaper turned his head to the side, not wanting to look at her further. With more tears escaping from his eyes, he felt so vulnerable for the first time--even in front of a woman whom he's not even that close with.
"I don't know what to say. I don't know what to do."
"Then don't think about it for now and just act accordingly to what you feel without having the urge to push people away," Lilith answered, now reaching out to his face to touch him.
"Lilith--"
"Take this as a training," she interrupted once more, now both of her hands cupping his mask. Even though she was touching his mask, her thumbs still felt the flesh on his face.
Amon is not cold at all. The warmth on his face was enough to tell Lilith that he, too, is a being who is real.
He just often distanced himself and made him feel lonely and aloof for their protection.
"You do realize you're hurting yourself, too, when you avoid people who want to make you feel that you matter?"
"Lilith--"
"Hush..." Lilith blushed, a smile appearing on her face as she continued tugging on the heartstrings of the Grim Reaper. "I know you're wearing a mask... but I could tell that you have a very gentle and handsome face."
Amon didn't say a word. With Lilith continuing to look at him and with the protection of the mask, the Grim Reaper prayed deeply in his heart that he won't ever hurt or kill this lovely, lively, innocent lady before him.
With fear quickly building up in his chest, the Grim Reaper started to panic. He even thought right here and then that maybe even being touched or him touching her, would hurt her if they stayed too long.
"Lilith--"
"Don't be afraid, Amon."
His name being called by Lilith sounded like music to his ears, soothing him and telling him that there is nothing to fear.
"Don't be scared. I'm here. I won't go anywhere."