Ai wasn't sure if Jun was insulting her or consoling her.
It feels warm. Just like how it felt when he held my hand in my past life…
Strangely enough, Jun was also thinking along the same lines.
The warmth, the softness just felt like when he had clutched Ai's hand in his dying moments. A flicker passed through his gaze.
Usually, Jun would give a snide remark about her stories, but this time he quietly asked, "You got a beef with happy endings?"
"No."
"Then why don't you write one?" He moved the ice pack to another spot. His other hand was still holding onto her slightly trembling palm.
"Because I don't know what happy endings feel like."
He slowly widened his eyes.
"How can I write one when I don't understand what they look like?"
"...Do your stories reflect that?"
"In a way, yes. My first story was about a couple who found love in each other and got happily married. They had a daughter, and they thought that days would pass happily like that. But what looks so beautiful before marriage suddenly changes when you begin to live together under one roof. What you found adorable before becomes irritating later. That was the story about my parents."
Jun said nothing.
"My parents got divorced because they realized it too late that they are not meant for each other. The love just disappeared. They went their separate ways. I live with my mother but do meet my father sometimes who lives separately from us. That made me realize my seemingly perfect family was not so perfect."
He was silent for a moment.
"Why did you choose this pen name?"
Ai thought about it as she reminisced about the past. "Because my relationship with my parents is fairly good. They are separated, but it doesn't mean Mom or Dad hate me. Dad and I have a relationship like any other normal father-daughter would have. Indeed, my family is broken. I would naturally prefer if they lived together lovingly like before. But they found their own happiness, and my relationship with both of them is just fine. Mom doesn't mind if I meet Dad, and Dad has no issues with me living with Mom."
She tilted her head. "My world is imperfect, but it's going fine, right? I am imperfectly just fine."
Jun hummed. He didn't give her any sympathy because he felt it was insulting to sympathize. But he understood where she was coming from and even if a little bit, he felt closer to her.
"It's going well, but it's still not a happily-ever-after. That's why it's difficult for me to envision one. It made me realize that nothing is perfect."
"I beg to differ," Jun protested. "My life is-...was perfect."
Now that he had broken up with Shui and was thrown out of the Liu villa by his father, his life wasn't perfect like his past life. Nevertheless, he strongly believed in perfection.
"My family is perfect. Mom and Dad are still lovey-dovey like they always were. I have good parents, good siblings even if they are annoying, good grandparents and good relatives. My relationship with my cousins, aunts and uncles is fairly well. I am good looking and rich too," he proudly smirked, "I have gotten everything that one would want in their life."
If you minus the love part…
Ai stared at him unblinkingly.
"I never thought you would be a narcissist."
"..."
"I am not a narcissist. We should always appreciate what we have," he coldly retorted.
"Indeed. But there is one fault in your thinking. You think your life is perfect, but is that true? The world population is around seven billion where everybody has some or the other problems in their life. I don't think God would be so gracious enough to bless only you with a perfect life," she tilted her head again. "You are not anybody special."
His face blackened.
Not anybody special. That was a critical hit to his heart.
"You are talking about your parents' good relationship. That may be true now, but was it always true before?"
He frowned.
"If you meet them, you would know. They are crazy for each other," he sneered. "So much that it makes me dizzy at times."
She shook her head. "You are not getting my point. I am talking about when they met. When they fell for each other and when they got married. To you, their relationship now looks perfect. But have you ever asked them what they had to go through in their past to make it like this today? Did you ever get to know their love story?"
"...I don't need to."
"That's where you are wrong," Ai stated. "You are one-sidedly looking at the result, not the journey. Outcome always looks beautiful. It's the process of achieving it that is harsh, hurting but where you learn the most."
His mouth twitched. He didn't want to agree to her, but he couldn't retort to her either.
Damn it!
Ai said, "My arm is fine now."
Jun kept the ice pack aside. He coughed and retracted his other hand from hers too.
"Thank you for everything you did today," Ai smiled within her mask. "I hope I can pay you back for your help sometime in the future."
"No need."
"I will take my leave-"
"Wait."
She furrowed her brows and sat back. "Yes?"
From his bag, Jun took three books out. She blinked.
These are my published books…
Jun handed her a pen and slid the books towards her. "Sign them."
Ai was utterly confused. "W-What?"
Jun glared at her. "What part of 'Sign them' did you not understand? These are the books that you wrote. The author is sitting in front of me. I am your reader, and I want you to sign them. So get to it."
She stared at him in a stupor.
"Y-you want me to sign them?"
"Yes."
"Me?"
"MissImperfectlyFine is you. So who else would I be talking to? I wouldn't be giving you somebody else's books."
Suddenly, he saw a tear slip out on her cheek. He choked. "Why are you crying? You are making me look like a villain!"