MC previous life time skip (Too lazy to write that :D)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
" Is the name Alex Buchanan correct?"
" What the hell! Where is this?"
Alex held his head, his vision was still not fully restored. The last time he remembered. He was going to the grocery store to buy some stuff and then a siren echoed and he was now in a white room. It was just him, a chair, and a man wearing a Dormeuil Vanquish suit, adjusting his gold monocle, staring at his Macbook. He spoke:
" Hmm hmm, another 21-century earthling. It's good that I won't have to explain too much, in short, you're dead and you'll be preparing to 'Isekai' to a new world."
" Bullshit! Do you think I'll believe that? Bring me back w—"
The strange man took out what looked like a TV remote and after a click in the middle of the room was a hologram screen.
" This is…"
On the screen is Alex living in the house with his family, it fast-forwards to the part where he goes to the grocery store, everything was exactly as he remembered, and then… A truck came and what was once Alex was now just pieces of meat. Alex had to try his best not to vomit as the screen zoomed further and further into the 'heap' that was once him.
" Want me to return you to this 'state'?"
" N-No! Please no! I trust you!"
Likewise, 90% of Isekai protagonists Alex immediately adapted to the situation without any question, all problems with his family, friends, and ex-girlfriend were erased from his mind.
" Hmm good. Now onto the fact that hmm this might be lucky for you to be assigned to the God of Fanfiction."
" Fan— what?"
" Fanfiction. Something you read to the point of forgetting to apply for a job."
" H-Wait I know what it is but what's with the God of Fanfiction."
The man raised an eyebrow, he stare at Alex with a 'Really?' face.
" I have three wishes?"
" Your IQ is a bit low for someone who eats and sleeps with fanfics. Yes, you will get wishes but not 3, your number of wishes is unlimited."
" What???"
Alex exclaimed happily.
' Unlimited wishes, I can become a god, build a harem, and—'
" Don't rush to celebrate just yet. This year's policy is different from usual."
" Policy? "
" The Fanfic God is tired of watching you earthlings overpower in another world without even trying to move a toe. There are too many people acting like spoiled brats and insulting the situation of the characters in the original world. What word is it did he use to describe the situation? Hmmm 'Cringe'. Yeah, this year's policy is an Anti-Cringe campaign that brings everything back to balance."
" I-I don't understand, but if so, why give me endless wishes?"
A smile appeared on the mysterious man's face.
" Each of your wishes comes with a corresponding curse. The more favorable the wish, the more terrible the curse. Feel free to say what you want, and I'll tell you the curse that comes with it."
" What if I wish I had Saitama's abilities?"
" Hmm, the strongest in the world no, the whole universe. Give me a moment."
He typed something into his laptop and smiled.
" The curse that goes with it will be an actual effect that will be applied to you."
" What do you mean?"
" Real life isn't a comic book, what do you think would happen if someone so powerful that they could destroy everything stepped on a planet? Yes, the planet will crumble. Or rather, anything you exert force on will shatter on a molecular level. As a result, you will almost certainly be floating in space for a very, very long time."
Alex paled, if that's true then what's the point of having infinite power when he's the only living being in the universe? It's worse than dying.
" S-So what if my second wish is that I can control that can adjust that power to be able to touch other creatures?"
"I see what you mean."
'Clack Clack', after a few keystrokes he answered.
"In that case, the curse will change, rather it will combine both of your wishes to produce a new curse. In this case, the curse will change so that you will not be able to attack any living thing directly or indirectly. Saying it means you can't kill people, directly attack, or indirectly use another substance or any other means to attack even if you trick someone into attacking the target it counts as a taboo. You can only accidentally attack someone."
He then laughs.
"With your carelessness and combined with your strength, the people you attack are almost certainly innocent or important to you. Ah I forgot, the curse increases the chance to attack others 'accidentally' by 9999999%"
'M*#her F$%ers '
Alex silently cursed all of his predecessors. If only they had been less Edgy and Cringe, he wouldn't have been in this situation.
" Okay, I decided the first thing I want to know is which world I am going to Isekai to?"
" Akame ga kill."
" Fckkk!"
'What the hell is a world where people die all the time?'
After an hour Alex asked for all the powers he could think of, but the curses that came with them were too much for him to bear. He noticed that the stronger the ability, the more irrational the curse. It's safe if he chooses wishes in moderation and it seems that if the wishes are related to the world he's coming to, the level of the curse will decrease considerably. For example, if you wish you had the abilities of a Marvel character compared to if you wished for a Teigu with similar abilities. The curse he received from Teigu would be much lighter.
" Hurry up, I don't have all the time for you, you only have 15 minutes left."
" W- Wait I want immunity from the curse of Murasame."
" Heh, you seem to have learned a bit, the curse for it will be that all poisons applied to you will increase their potency by 40%."
' Shit! It's okay, just avoid getting poisoned'
" I wanted to know about all kinds of toxins and how to get rid of them. "
" The curse is your ability to absorb implied knowledge -50%. Simply put, your process of learning any other kind of knowledge will take twice as long as usual. It will not affect your processing ability if you have learned and understood them."
" OK, next I want a Teigu."
" What level? We have weak, medium, strong, legend. For example, legend Teigus are such as Demon extract of Esdeath, Incurso of Tatsumi, strong ones are Akame's Murasame, Kurome's Yatsufusa, Susano, Mine's Pumbkin, medium ones are Sheele's Extase, Lubbock's Cross Tail the weak ones are Chelsea's Gaea Foundation."
Alex was surprised that Murasame wasn't a legend when Akame was able to beat Esdeath. But if you think about it carefully, Murasame has too many obvious weaknesses, the curse only works on living creatures and its ultimate skill will eat away the user's life.
"I warn you in advance that legends come with a frightening curse."
Alex held his head thinking, if this is Akame's world without the Teigu, it will be very difficult for him to survive but if it is only at a low level, the possibility of him dying is still very high, and didn't all the low-ranking Teigu holder died in that story? The choice will be either a strong or a legend, he favors the strong ones because depending on the user, they can surpass the legends. But thinking that he would die just because the opponent's tools were stronger than him, he couldn't make a decision. As if reading Alex's mind, the man smiled.
"I have a solution for you, it's called the gacha of destiny, you'll spin to randomly pick a legend-type Teigu and its curse will only be as the strong ones."
Of course, this solution immediately caught his attention, but he didn't get to choose the ability of the Teigu… After thinking for a while Alex decided to accept his fate. The man turned on his computer and opened a page with the domain name Teigu.wow on which was a list of Teigu's names, a red box indicating what he would receive and a red button. Alex click on the red button and the wheel glowed, he could see familiar names like Incursio and Demon extract flash before his eyes. And the last Teigu he received was the 'Rune of Bond'.
"Huh Rune?"
"Yes, it is quite an abstract concept in your world but believe me it is the best kind of imperial tool you can get."
"What is its ability?"
"I advise you not to know, Even though the curse is only a strong level at the moment but it is still terrible, if you come to the new world without knowledge of it, the curse will drop another level. "
After pondering, he chose not to know the information about the Teigu.
' It's a legendary one anyway.'
" Next, I want to have a higher talent for combat than anyone else in this world."
" Just to be clear, there are a lot of things called combat, marksmanship, assassination, resistance…"
" All."
" Heh, are you sure? Wouldn't you like the curse that came with it?"
" I'm sure, I won't survive without talent."
" Okay, the curse would be… it would be more fun not to tell you. That's what Fanfiction God sent me."
" Hey -"
The man raised a hand to stop Alex before he voices any complaints.
"If I were you, I wouldn't want to upset him."
"…"
"Do you have anything else? Reincarnation time? Background."
"N-No I already have enough curses on my head!"
"Very well, good luck in the new world."
A light enveloped Alex and he disappeared, but before that Alex could hear the mysterious man's last words: "Don't die too soon~"