Chapter Twenty Two:
Yes, People are listening in and 'Old Slippery' doesn't like it.
October was pushing on, and there was yet another meeting at the Bull. All the important parties were there plus the old 'Majors'. Well, they were always there. Very important questions had been formulated. Lina did her chair cleaning trick and Old Slippery dutifully appeared.
What was really of concern now were those people who were recording the meetings in secret, with no permission whatsoever from anyone in the meeting. They were as much an 'issue' as the 'Red Top' press. In a way more so. The debate was very sensitive. It was dealing with some very far-reaching matters. The last thing anyone in the committee wanted was for any of this to be misrepresented. Things were moving forward very tentatively, as should be the case.
Old Slippery was surveying everything very carefully. The general consensus among the committee members was that he too was aware of this latest infringement. The Detective Chief Inspector picked up on this.
"Old Slippery knows people are listening in and recording stuff. You can not hide anything from him."
Of course, the next major worry was how would Old Slippery react?
A number of us knew who these people were and who they were associated with. They knew the supreme importance of what was happening and were keen to find out more. However, pumping out half articulated analysis via the web was no answer. In time our committee would start to formulate some ideas, but these were still early days in these deliberations.
"He knows who they are." The Detective Chief Inspector added. "If you watched Slippery closely you could see how he was 'clocking' each individual person."
Yes, the Resident Ghost was in fact looking very intently at several individuals.
There was then a quick discussion among all of us. The regular members knew full well that Slippery could quickly lose it and 'go ape.'
The Detective Chief Inspector stood up and addressed everyone in the Restaurant Lounge Bar.
"For those who do not know who I am my name is Detective Chief Inspector John Higgins. This is Detective John Franks and Detective William Russell. (pointing to the two young detectives) A number of you are aware of this regular Friday meeting. The Metropolitan Police Authority has given us a special dispensation to attend these meetings although we could be summed by radiophone at any time. It has come to our notice that several people have been illicitly recording our meetings here. I am currently looking into the legality of this."
All the people in the Lounge Bar Restaurant looked around at the Detective Chief Inspector. Some seemed somewhat furtive plus uncomfortable. The Detective Chief Inspector hoped his speech had 'nipped all this in the bud'
However, when the meeting started there were suspicions that people were still recording. The implications of what people discussed were so important that everyone was left in a quandary as to what to do. Pamela Parsons had outlined some ideas for a documentary or a series of documentaries, but these were still very much in the developmental stage. This might help assuage people's interests when the documentaries came out.
Meanwhile, human nature being what it is, a few continued to illicitly record. The committee was in full strength. The clerical representatives had been in communication with their superiors. For example, Father O'Halligan had been explaining everything to his Cardinal who in turn was keeping the Pope himself informed. Messages were being passed backward and forwards. Ideas for further questions were being discussed. These meetings had to be allowed to let these very far-reaching issues be openly discussed.
The Detective Chief Inspector quipped. "There are some nutters out there still recording stuff. There were some bizarre websites repeating passages from these meetings on the web or the Wild West Web (WWW) as I call it."
The Detective Chief Inspector went on. "Slippery has clocked them. I will try and contain him but he might really lose it"
Slippery Jake's eyes were starting to flick red, not a good sign. Members of the committee noticed this as did some of the regulars in the Lounge Restaurant Bar. The Detective Chief Inspector looked squarely at Old Slippery and they started communicating. The Resident Ghost was fully aware of what was going on and he was far from happy with what he was noticing. He may well be an emissary of God at present, but his old vicious character was just below the surface. The Detective Chief Inspector implored him to relent as a lot of what had already been achieved could be thrown away if Old Slippery acted rashly.
The Detective Chief Inspector decided to get up again and address the Lounge Bar customers again.
"It seems a number of you have not heeded my advice. You have flagrantly continued to record. I will be forced to take action along with my two inspectors and have you forcibly removed. There is nothing to stop you from legally doing what you are doing. However, if you then broadcast this on other media such as the web, this is without the permission of the 'parties' here, the committee. What you have been recording has not been sanctioned or is not in agreement with the committee, then this could be a civil matter."
"However here, our resident ghost the Right Hon Jake Horatio Higginbottom, or Slippery Jake, is far from happy with this matter. Many regular customers here will know what Slippery Jake is capable of. He is currently showing increasing signs of discomfort with all of this. Consequently, this is now becoming an issue of public safety, primarily your safety."
There was some shifting and shuffling in certain seats. Various recording devices were hidden away.
The meeting got started. Abdullah, the Sufi Imam along with Rabbi Abraham wanted to discuss the true nature of God in more detail, using the Chief Inspector to communicate with Slippery Jake.
The Chief Rabbi asked. "To clarify, God is not a single entity?"
"No", was the straightforward reply from Slippery Jake via the Chief Inspector.
The Chief Rabbi obviously wanted more clarification. However, Inspector John Franks, along with the official recorders Sandra and Kevin, noticed someone recording under the table, using a small recording device. There were a number of other offenders as well.
They were not the only ones to notice. Slippery Jake moved from his chair. Yes, he was kind of gliding, but also strolled in the direction of the offenders. Those nearby were aghast and pulled back their chairs.
His motion was very deliberate. He stood over each offender and glared at them. They felt waves of very icy cold air flood over them. In particular, at certain intimate parts of their anatomy. As these were all men, these were their 'crown jewels.' The Old Ghost had the precision of a physician. He knew exactly the right amount of pain to administer in these intimate areas. Old Slippery's eyes acted like directional radar. Yes, he knew precisely the degree of extreme discomfort that each man could take. In each case, this was just short of depriving them totally of their 'manhood'.
Those with any sense shot out of the Lounge Bar Restaurant immediately. A few that lingered were subjected to more pain. They did not last much longer and consequently, they shot straight out as well.
Once completed, Slippery Jake took his three-cornered hat and twirled it as he made a stately bow. He made one in the direction of the committee, then turned systematically around the Lounge Bar, repeating his bow, He ended up facing the bar. Sid bowed and Beryl reciprocated as did all the barmaids with a curtsy. Many others in the Lounge bar joined in with stately bows and curtsies in the direction of Slippery Jake. Somebody called out "Three cheers for Slippery Jake!!"
"Who raa, who raa, who raa" everybody chorused. Old Slippery went back to his chair with a big grin on his face and nodded in the direction of the committee as if to say, it was safe to continue. This was his intention anyway.
Later of course the press got 'wind' of all these events. If nothing else it gave the 'Red Top' press an opportunity for more dreadful headlines.
Here are a few examples:
BULL GHOST BLASTS GONADS!!
OLD SLIPPERY SHOWS BALLS FREEZING BALLS!!
PAIN DOWN BELOW DRIVES AWAY GHOST'S UNWANTED GUESTS!!
EAVESDROPPERS' PRIVATE PARTS ARE FROZEN BY BULL GHOST!!
NO MORE BULL WANTED BY OLD SLIPPERY AT THE BULL!!
The justice delivered by Old Slippery may have seemed a bit extreme. This may be only a 'civil' case, but what was being discussed in the Bull was starting to be very important. The committee members also saw that Old Slippery understood this as well. He took specific actions to deal with this problem.
Professor James Hudson was particularly interested in this behaviour. The Regency was his specialism and he had done a lot of digging around on the subject of Old Slippery along with a number of his Ph.D. students. He had been capable of this kind of control and clarity of thought during his life. This lessened as time went on. Was this down to his syphilis? Were there other factors? He may have been bipolar? Or did he simply have a very quick temper which he had problems controlling as he got older?
The Professor then went on to ponder on some other matters. Had recent events here in the Bull and the advent of the committee started to change his behaviour? His relationship with the Chief Inspector? Had that shown a way to modify his behaviour? He was also now performing a very critical role as a conduit between ourselves and it seemed the 'Supreme Being'. If he were actually alive and in his 'prime' he would not have thought twice about dispatching anyone that crossed him with his rapier sword. However now he had shown an amazing restraint.
"A lot of this could be down to you Detective Chief Inspector." Professor James Hudson added. The Detective Chief Inspector smiled rather sheepishly. He was not used to such effusive compliments, especially in his job.
The platform was now laid. Slippery Jake too was determined to push on. He had a critical role to play. This was something he never had in life and he seemed to be relishing it now.
It was clear that the true nature of 'God' was beyond current understanding, way beyond. Each member present had a contribution to make. Thanks to Slippery these deliberations could continue. Everybody on the committee liked the ambiance of the Lounge Bar Restaurant in the Bull Public House. Of critical importance, Old Slippery was there. Without him, these deliberations would not be possible, obviously. The rest of the regulars and customers were pretty understanding regarding this latest 'Slippery' incident. They had a very good idea about what was going on and were sensitive enough not to intervene. They could see how important all of this was.
Therefore, the committee got down to business. There were so many critical areas to address. Pamela Parsons was given the job to chair again. She was also given the role of prioritizing what should be discussed first and those areas that would need the input of Slippery Jake via the Detective Chief Inspector.
Is this role OK for the Detective Chief Inspector given his duties? This was something that was starting to worry him a lot. He was the pivot in this whole discourse, an essential link with his ability to 'mind read' Slippery Jake. But his very important policeman's role had to take priority.
This was something that was clearly understood by his superiors. Everything seemed totally ridiculous, but they were enlightened enough to see how important this was. He was on call 24/7. If a call asking for him on his radio phone came through, he had to reply to it and act on it immediately. Which he would. To date, this had not happened much during a meeting.
So the scene was now set for some very serious discussion. The Detective Chief Inspector had a very important part to play in this. The focus was now back on Pamela Parsons. Everyone allowed her to make decisions about which topics to develop. Although mindful of there being too many in the 'committee' already, she was wondering if they shouldn't invite science specialists to the next meeting.
Someone interested in particle physics. Professor James Hudson was given this task to sound out any interested parties at Oxford University, who could find the time and also would be interested in contributing.
The Spiritual and the Scientific should not be opposed to each other. They were two sides of the same coin in the quest to understand the 'Great Why? Why anything? The world of particle physics and of astronomy are at opposite ends of this great search.
Professor James Hudson through his academic links and contacts knew someone who would be particularly interested in joining these discussions, Professor Alistair McCullough, Professor of Astrophysics at Oxford University. Professor James Hudson had already been updating him on the discussions. He could clearly see a link between the spiritual and the scientific. He too saw them as both sides of the same coin. The quest to explain the Great Why. He was in his 60s now and had a fairly light lecturing timetable. So a regular Friday meeting in a good pub was not a problem. He still kept abreast of all the latest developments in his field from all over the world.