I need a moment to process what happened. I feel like everything is moving too fast and I cannot control it. I make sure Madame is okay before I go back to the hotel.
The minute I shut the door of the hotel room, I fall on the bed and exhale heavily.
What the actual fuck?
I feel like my life is a movie, everything happening around me and I cannot control it. There is a producer, a director and the camera lights are on. When did this all become so tangled up so much?
I cannot believe that it's my life and yet I know so little about it. I have to have the power I went out to look for, that is not debate. I know cannot sit and wait for Madame to be feeding me what she seems fit to do. For one, she knows everything I do and that's the first thing I should know how she is able to do that.
