Haiz!
I slumped down to the floor and buried my face in my hands.
My head became lighter and calmer as I rested for a while.
All that smiling was quite draining, the pretence, the giggles, everything was just too much.
"I hate myself," I whispered.
If I could pull my hair just to end all this then I would have, but cutting myself off Helio would cost more than going bald.
The room fell into silence, the only noise I could hear was the ticking of the wall clock.
"Come on Becca, you have barely twenty-eight minutes before he comes after you," I warned myself.
With groans and great difficulty, I dragged myself up and made my way to the bathroom while. Staggered like a drunk.
Everything felt tiring, even the mere thought of taking a shower was much of a bother to me, and yet I have to convince myself with new reasons why I should every fucking day.
I turn on the shower and let the water run free.
