The memories flooded in, it was all a scam. There were no true wizard powers, the gold stars acted as temporary batteries for specific spells. It all came to a head when my clone simply blew up the meteor they had been tricking people into delaying. No wizard powers, but I can sell the stars at least.
Immediately, the two other clones came through the door. One of which was coated in blood and guts, the other was dressed up in a nice brown suit and tie for whatever reason, though sporting a nice new watch.
They both dispersed, the first was sent to the depths of hell, forced to participate in a gladiator style tournament. Eventually managing to grab a demon body and run to an alcove with a portal some cultists were creating to hell. They were all naturally exterminated. Additionally, my polyglot skill seems to only apply to non-magical languages, thus I had to get a small grasp of Demonic during my clone's stay.
[Lethal weapon lv2 -merger-]
[Demonic Language lv3]
The other was sent to see who I now know as prismo, who said that we don't need to be in uniform there, beaming us with that new outfit. After discussing for why and how I was there, he mentioned that his sleeping body had a watch like the one mentioned and simply let us have it. Though we have been told to come back once in a while, thus gifting us the ability to teleport there and back specifically.
That was… varied, I think I'm still processing all of that… I met Prismo. The literal wishmaker of the universe, my clone didn't understand who he was since by then we hadn't read the dark magic books. All records show him being rather approachable, but caution is still warranted.
I still have 6 hours left before I reopen, I'll have a shower then try and get better at the piano. Marceline knows notes and sheet music, maybe she can give me a practice sheet?
[Time skip]
[Piano lv3]
The morning rush is breezed past by having 4 people assist, including myself. Orders were being done as they were taken and I could even spare a clone to man the door and clean. I should've absolutely sorted my shifts out before it got this bad.
"Yo what even is this place!" A purple lumpy mass with a star on its forehead came in, oh my god it's hideous. I mentally prepare the thorns just in case.
"Welcome to Olivarick's bar, what can I get for you?" Keep your calm, it might be reasoned with.
[Lumpy space princess -
A 15 year old anti-elemental being of lumps. Currently the princess of the lumpy space kingdom, however her attitude may drive the kingdom into extinction. Can turn people into lumpy beings through a bite.
Currently- Curious, lumpy]
I don't even know what to say, what the hell is a lumpy anti-elemental.
"Uhhh yah, could I have some OJ?" I can literally see Finn, Jake and Princess Bubblegum hiding from her in the back. How bad could she be?
I explain the rules of purchase and trade and poor put her drink.
"Why are you staring at me?!" She suddenly got angry, "Unless you like what you see haha" Definitely below my age range so this feels wildly uncomfortable for me.
"Sorry, I'll be more mindful of that." If she tries biting me, I'm not sure if my status nullification will acknowledge it. Since it's not exactly a status and more of a transformation… I just figured out how she's paying. "LSP can I ask that for payment you bite my clone here? I want to see if I'm able to fight it or not."
"Huh? Uhm okay fine I guess." She was a bit surprised, but agreed nonetheless. She cautiously bit the clone I gave her and went back to her orange juice.
'4:34PM'
A few hours passed and my clone was still non-lumpy, so I dispersed it.
[Status nullification lv6 -Merger-]
Must've been difficult if it managed to level it up, but at least I won't ever end up lumpy. The spare clone, I decided to send to The Boys, to use the internet for beer making lessons. I think I should get one of those wifi things Hughie mentioned, it would save me the clone at least. If I had a series of computers and had all of my clones working them, I could sweep vast amounts of data at once.
Quite a good idea I think, Hughie knows electronics so I'll let him do it as a trade. The afternoon turns into evening and evening to night, the bar is host to a few stragglers and I send out the rest of my clones to look at more distillery processes and the like.
All was quiet until a familiar dark red creature burst in and held the door shut. "Al'Kathath! How are you? Is it demon hunters bothering you?"
"You? But how, never mind… a glass of tears of the damned." I activate the small pentagram and scoop a full glass of tears up for them.
[Tears of the damned
A demon favourite on the south-eastern side of hell. Collected from the tortured sinful souls that are trapped in hell forever.
2% alcohol.]
It's alcoholic? I wouldn't have guessed, not by much though but still. Just as the glass touched their lips, the door creaked open men and women in bandages walked in adorning slightly yellow glowing blades.
"Al'Kathath, step outside and we'll make this quick." The woman in front snarled at him. No way are they even thinking of killing one of my paying customers.
[Bansi Hawkrest
A demon hunter of the intermediary rank. Currently assembled in a squad of those deemed unfit for civilised society and thus sent directly to hell. Her crimes list numerous and dangerous.
Currently - Wary of you, focused on the mission.]
[Observe lv18]
"Hold it Bansi, Al'Kathath is a valued customer and contributor to my bar. I'm afraid I cannot allow a blatant threat like that to go by unnoticed." I block the door off with thorns, my eyes glowing with the frenzied flame.
I create a corridor to myself out of the thorns, "How might we reach an agreement on this I wonder?" I say, after all if all of them contribute as much as Al'Kathath has then I stand to profit.
"You harbour a demon, giant! Threats are merely promises of wha-" She gets cut off by being engulfed in a bright yellow flame, it leaves her skin singed yet she lay screaming on the floor. Blood dribbles from her ears and eyes as she speaks in reverse.
"Insanity is a privilege compared to your options, barter for your life."
I was given some holy water, flame barriers, exorcism lessons, demon hunting tips and the weapons of each of them. Satisfactory enough I let them go, keeping Bansi here though.