It takes me more than a few seconds to fully comprehend what she said.
"Werewolves?" I repeat giving Stacy an incredulous look. I expect her to burst into a grin and shout just kidding ! but her face remains serious as she says " yes, werewolves"
A memory of the creatures chasing me, snarling and snapping their
teeth, flashes through my mind and I shudder. It wasn't hard to believe they actually were werewolves.
"You call them Varcolacks?" I ask Stacy and she replies, sitting up
straighter, "there are two kinds of werewolves, simply said: the good
ones and the bad ones"
"I'm guessing the ones that attacked were bad?"
Stacy nods. "But there are good ones too?" I ask again.
"Yes" says Stacy "We're called Lykans"
Again I blink at her, dumbfounded, because I think she just made a grammatical mistake with the pronouns, but then I realize what she was actually trying to tell me.
"We?" I ask, trying to keep the trembling out of my voice. She nods again, her blue eyes scan my face like she is trying to decipher my thoughts.
"You mean like all of you?" I ask and my eyes skim the room briefly meeting everyone else's steady gaze on me and their feelings are almost palpable - nervous, anxious.
"Yes; all of us: Irene, Seth, Ryan, Garcia and me. . . we're werewolves"
The breath leaves my lungs and I feel faint. I shut my eyes then open
them again to try and get rid of the dizziness. Another glance around the room and everyone's eyes are still on me, waiting -dreading my reaction.
Werewolves. An image of those terrifying creatures pops into my head
like an uninvited guest and I can't seem to push it away. They are werewolves. Your closest friends are werewolves. A small dark part of me whispers. I gulp, or at least I try to but it feels like I'm choking.
I feel someone's hand touch mine and I flinch involuntarily. I turn to see Irene, who is sitting next to me, looking concerned. Her hand is covered over mine; I hadn't realized I was gripping the cushion under me so hard that my knuckles hurt. "You okay?" she asks, her voice soft and gentle as if she were afraid of frightening me. There is a pang in my heart as I realize with another glance around the room, that my friends - my own friends were scared of how I would react to them being werewolves. Scared that I would be repulsed by them, terrified of them, not wanting anything to do with them anymore, scared that I would hate them for what they are and maybe want them gone or worse - dead.
I turn my attention back to Irene and flip my hand from underneath hers to grip her own and nod "I'm fine".
Never. I make a silent vow as I meet Stacy's then Irene's gaze. I would never be afraid of them, never wish them harm and would never abandon them. They were my friends and they had treated me with love and affection, lifting me up when I was at my lowest, celebrating my joys as their own and just being there for me, someone who cared about me. And I know I have done the same for them and would continue to do so, regardless of who or what they were.
From the squeeze in Irene's hand and the wobbly smile Stacy offers, unspilled tears in her eyes, I know my friends understood the look in my eyes as I made my unspoken promise.
I ask another question to keep the tears at bay from my own eyes. "What's the difference?" Stacy had called the bad ones Varcolacks and the good ones- themselves- Lykans. If they were good they couldn't be as bad as those creatures that attacked prom. Stacy looks at me, confused, like she expected me to ask something else.
Irene answers me this time "The Varcolacks are bad because they are
corrupted with evil, they lose all of their human morality and principles, you can barely consider them human any more. All they live for is to wreak havoc and chaos. But the particular packs of Varcolacks here are worse because . . ."
At this point she hesitates before finishing. ". . . because they want to turn every human being into one of themselves".I have a feeling that was not what she meant to say but I don't stop her as she continues.
"And Lykans, though we are werewolves, we don't lose our human
virtues and go on killing sprees or bit-"
"Turning humans into werewolves" cuts in Seth making sure to drown Irene's voice out with his own. I turn to him, startled, at the sudden sound of his loud voice. But Seth's attention is on Irene, glaring at her but she just rolls her eyes, and I frown confused.
"Anyway" Stacy continues ignoring Seth and Irene, bringing my attention back to her, which I think was her goal. "We protect humans from Varcolacks; we can control our changes and our instincts unlike them, which is why they they have this wild urge to turn humans"
"But this group is especially vicious," says Irene. "They plan their attacks in human form and ambush crowded places, like what happened at prom"
"But we expected the attack on prom" says stacy "That was what the family meeting was about before we left, we were supposed to keep watch"
Family meeting. Were their whole families werewolves then ? I have a
million questions to ask but I ask the one that has been bugging me the most.
" How do Varcolacks . . . . turn people into one of them ?"
Everyone seems to share a nervous glance between them, particularly
with Seth.
"It's complicated" says Irene "Varcolacks can change anyone but Lykans can only change those who are born Lykans"
Irene is clearly trying to evade my question, all of them seem to be avoiding my gaze almost as if they are keeping something important from me and I find it very annoying. I briefly close my eyes and exhale hard.
"Okay" I try to sound patient "But how does the change really happen? What is the process, how do the Varckolacks turn people?" I make sure to meet everyone's gaze, demanding an answer. But they avert their eyes and remain quiet.
"She has to know anyway" says Garcia. "know what ?" I ask. All this suspense is making me nervous.
Garcia sighs and gets up from her chair "I'll leave it to you" She addresses the room at large and leaves after giving me a sympathetic glance.
"Is someone going to answer my question ?" I ask, feeling frustrated.
"No" says Seth dismissively.
"Why not ?"I protest.
"Because . . . " He doesn't seem to have an answer.
"She has to know better us telling her than her finding out herself or from them" says Irene, the last word filled with venom.
"Know what?" I ask desperately but no one answers me again. I sigh in defeat and hang my head in dread. A part of me already knows the answer, but I am waiting, hoping for someone to tell me I am wrong.
"It's like the myths isn't it?" I say softly, my voice barely a whisper in the quiet room. "A Varckolack has to bite you to turn you into one?" I say it like a question still hoping some would say it wasn't true,that I am wrong.
But no one does.