The thing about self-talk is that sometimes it works and other times it doesn't.
At one point you are telling yourself how much you are courageous and you can handle any shit thrown at you, and then the next thing you know, your mind is laughing at you about how shitty that point was.
From being courageous you feel shitty and now the self-talk deprecating comes in. Self-doubts, insecurities, the need to have someone to appreciate you, the need to have their support even if they don't give a damn.
It gets worse as you think how much you always support them and they don't support you.
It sucks, you know.
And now that self-deprecating talks have kicked in, you have no hope but to listen to them. The evil thing about evil is that it always exceeds goodness.
You try as much as you can to push them back because you want good so much. Who doesn't want good? Good is good.
