Casina lay across her bed, a sense of longing filling her heart. Her outstretched hand was on Jaspar, who lay beside her. It amazed her that he always seemed to find his way back to her. So now, she purposely left the glass doors open a bit so he could come and go as he pleased. Rolling onto her back, she gazed up at the colorful mural painted on the ceiling, at the gorgeous reproduction of the palace in all its splendor, her hand still on the cat.
"Mom," she whispered, deep sadness in her tone as she mindlessly stroked the feline. "How I wish you were here to give me answers. I miss you so much." She felt the trembling of her lower lip, as her eyes watered with unshed tears.
Her long day had ended, and she lay awaiting Mrovia, who was to bring her the high meal of that solarity. She had asked the woman once why she wasn"t allowed to eat in the dining hall - anyplace but in her suite alone - but Mrovia had told her it was by the Kaanig"s order that she must take all of her sustenance there. Alone.
Sniffing, Casina rolled back over to a sitting position on the edge of the bed, ignoring Jaspar as he darted off again. This time, she allowed herself to cry. Yes, she was kept busy, even more so than at the aviary, which she thoroughly missed. Now, instead of boredom and loneliness as in the beginning, fatigue and misery seemed to be her regular companions. She missed her family so much. And, not surprisingly, Uri.
Something had happened between them the night they had slept together in the tree. She felt more comfortable around him now and actually felt she could trust him. He had proven himself to her in so many ways. And as she thought about sleeping in his arms that one night, her heart tingled with warmth...and a desire for something more. She gasped and buried her face in her hands as a thought suddenly imploded within her.
Good heavens! Was she falling for him like a ton of bricks? An alien being whom she knew practically nothing about? Oh, God, what was she to do now? she wondered. She couldn"t involve herself with a married man, no matter how gorgeous and wonderful he seemed. And what about her vow to despise all aliens and escape back to Earth? Was that even on her agenda these days?
Mrovia"s expected knock startled her, drawing her from her depressed musings.
"Come in," she said, hastily dashing away her tears and standing to greet the servant who was bringing her dinner. "Thank you, Mrovia. Once again, you seem to be tempting my palate with new and unusual things to eat. And my nose to new aromas. The food is actually quite good here," she finally admitted. "And I really enjoyed that last entrée you brought me."
Mrovia grinned at her and crossed the room to shoulder open the glass doors in order to take the tray of food outside.
"We thought it would be nice if you had your repast out here tonight, pa"atay," she said, stepping onto the balcony, just as two other servants arrived there, having climbed the garden steps to set up a small table. It was round and shiny, and Casina watched curiously as two chairs were set on either side of it, to face the garden. A white cloth was laid over it.
"It might be nice to eat outdoors for a change," she agreed, feeling her mood lifting already. It was such a nice evening. A bit cooler than usual but, as twilight neared, the stars were already in abundance, twinkling overhead in the fiery orange-black sky. She stood aside as Mrovia hurried back inside to the outer corridor.
"Come, pa"atay. Sit," the woman said as she returned with another tray in hand. Casina watched as she began setting the table, even to the point of pulling a small vase of flowers from the tray to decorate it.
"This is just what I needed tonight," Casina said, carefully seating herself. "I"ve been feeling kinda down."
"Then how about some company?" came a familiar male voice. Casina turned sharply, her eyes widening at sight of the commander standing at the top of the stairs. Dressed in a dark blue, skintight outfit, again similar to the one she had first seen him in, he appeared even more handsome than usual. She gulped as her heart tightened in her chest, wondering if he knew how attracted she was to him. A brief nod from him quickly sent the servants scurrying to set out a few more items before leaving them alone. "We"ll serve ourselves," he told them as they departed.
A smile tugged at Casina"s lips as she stared up at her companion.
"Any company would be appreciated," she breathed softly. "I"ve been feeling a bit lonesome."
Uri"s lips curled in response as he moved to the seat beside her. "I thought you probably might.
Which is why I decided I"d make time to join you for repast."
"You are more than welcome to join me," she said, her insides now churning at thought of him sitting so close to her. "But I hope I"m not taking you away from more important things."
He gave a soft snort and leaned over, looking intently at her as his warm hand covered hers.
"I"ve made time for you, Casina. You are important to me, too."
His words sparked a flame somewhere deep inside her at this, and her eyes gleamed in wonderment as she met his gaze.
"Really?" she said in disbelief as he removed his hand and sat down.
"Yes."
A wealth of security suddenly washed over her and, with trembling hands, she reached for the entrée in front of her. The heady scent of his cologne drifted toward her, making her thoughts turn to the memory of him kissing her in the rainforest.
"W-Would you care for some?" she asked, feeling the blush heating her cheeks.
"I would indeed. Thank you." She could feel his gaze on her as he accepted the plate and helped himself. "I sent the servants away because I want to give you my complete and undivided attention for once."
At this, her mouth dropped. And she would have knocked over her glass of water had he not anticipated it. His hand quickly caught the drink and righted it, his fingers brushing against hers as he did so. Suddenly out of sorts, Casina snatched her hand away. Torrents of confusion poured through her, as she pondered her unsettled feelings now that he was there. Glancing up, she caught the glimmer in his dark eyes as he studied her flushed features and behavior toward him. Whatever had happened
to the flippant miss who had dared slap him across the face once or twice? she asked herself. Where on earth had she gone? She was curious as to whether he was wondering the same thing.
Embarrassed, she bent her head, concentrating on her plate. She tried ignoring him as he then took it upon himself to utter thanks to their Creator before filling her plate with whatever else Mrovia had brought them.
"After we eat, I thought you might join me for a walk."
Still with her head down, she nodded her approval of this idea. "I...I"d like that," she said shyly, eating carefully while keeping her gaze to herself, unaware that Uri was eyeing her with unusual consideration. "But won"t your...wife...mind?"
A brief pause followed this. "I don"t think she will mind at all," he said after a moment. "She doesn"t like being alone all the time either."
Definite relief came over her then. She glanced in his direction, but he was already focused on his plate. She stared down at her own but found herself unable to eat with him so near. But she forced herself, since she was rather hungry. Long days of physical training did that to a person.
After awhile, she lay aside her Kathian fork and sat back in her seat, trembling as she considered his last words. She watched him a moment, putting a hand to her glass to contain her agitation. When he suddenly reached out to pour them both some sharlok, one of many favorite Jupitarian spirits she had already sampled, she nearly jumped from her seat, thinking he was going to touch her again. She saw his eyes widen at her reaction. Then, after filling their empty goblets, he merely sat back and silently took a sip from his, his expression now guarded.
"If you"re not going to eat any more," he said, observing her through hooded eyes, "at least finish your drink before our walk. It should relax you." Nodding slowly, Casina moved her shaking hands to her own goblet and put it to her lips. She drank deeply, enjoying the way the beverage made her feel. All warm inside...and definitely more relaxed.
"Come," he said after a moment, rising to lead her toward the steps. Still unsettled, she rose and nervously followed him down the steps and into the garden. "The sunset is quite spectacular tonight, I think."
"Sorta reminds me of the Saagernon," she commented. The sinking sun was casting slinking shadows over the trees and other foliage, and a cooler than normal breeze was dancing across their skin, making her shiver a bit. "It"s just not as warm." She began rubbing her arms, but Uri gave her a casual glance, ignoring her discomfort. Were they in Sequestia, he probably would have pulled her closer, she believed, somewhat miffed that he was paying her no mind. Faith, was it only a few months
ago she had arrived in Jupitar? And that she had gone swimming with him in the rainforest? How things could change.
"Mrovia tells me you won"t be attending the celebration," he said offhandedly. "That is unfortunate. I would have liked to have shared some of our dance steps with you."
Casina halted and peered up at him in the growing twilight.
"You"re...going?"
"Yes," he said, halting to peer down at her speculatively. "Does that mean you might change your mind?"
"Um, maybe," she said, continuing their walk. "It"s just that...I don"t know the language very well yet. And I hardly know anybody. I doubt I"ll have much fun."
He chuckled at her lame excuses as he led her down a maze of paths that eventually led them to a spot she had never seen before. A large precipice, its steep edge bordered by the serpentine wall, from which was an incredible view of a domed city below, at the base of the mountain.
"Wow," she breathed. "Is that...Zaratan?"
"Yes," he said. "Our capital."
"Oh, I didn"t know," she said, glancing over at him. "It is so beautiful from up here. I hadn"t realized before just how nice it is. Um, why does it have a dome over it?"
"The dome is for protection. Many of our largest cities have them. So an enemy won"t come in and easily wipe them out. In some places, it helps protect the populace from electromagnetic storms as well."
A sudden blast of cold air made a strong effort to propel them backwards as they leaned against the wall to look down at the city. This part of the wall was several feet lower than the one Casina had escaped over before, yet was still as high as her sternum. She had to stand on the tips of her toes in order to peer over it at the scene below.
"Oh, brr," she said, rubbing her arms against the chill yet smiling to herself, delighted at how Zaratan sparkled like a million lightning bugs flying around. She sensed Uri watching her reaction to something he had probably seen many times. "I just can"t get over the fact that I lived there for awhile." He snorted softly, remaining passive.
"Will you take me there again some time?"
"Eventually."
At this, she drew away to look up at him, understanding that the previous incident there was what was probably keeping her at TrCasinaar. He stood with an elbow resting on the wall, watching her with serious mien.
"I would like you to attend the celebration," he said at last, ignoring the scenery and pulling no punches.
She continued staring at him in perplexity.
"Why? I"m just another Zarcon. Nothing more. What difference would it make if I go?"
He gave another snort as he turned his attention to the scenery. "You"re more than just a Zarcon to me, Casina. And besides. It will get you out and about. It"ll be your chance to see more of TrCasinaar."
She continued staring at him, daring to believe her ears. What was he actually saying?
"I"ll...think about it," she said at length, dropping her gaze and returning her attention to the scene below. "But I"m making no promises."
She sensed him nodding beside her, but he made no reply.
"Hey," she said, brightening as she returned her attention to Zaratan. "Can we go to the auveron sometime? I"d really like to visit there again and read to that little boy."
"Someday," he responded. "Once you"re more fluent in Kathian."
She turned abruptly, gaping up at him this time. By her own words, she had condemned herself. Meeting his gaze, she quickly snapped her mouth shut and turned away.
"You did say the language was a barrier preventing you from attending the celebration, did you not?"
Feeling sheepish, she nodded mutely. Aware of his focus on her, she knew she had put her foot in her mouth this time.
When his overlong silence unnerved her, she decided she couldn"t handle it any more. "I think I"d like to go back now," she interjected, stepping away from the wall. "It"s a bit chilly here."
"As you wish," was all he said. Joining her, they walked back to her quarters, strolling companionably, yet silently along the smoothly-paved walkways. At the steps to her balcony, he gave a slight nod and departed without further discussion. "I bid you good night then."
"Good night," she said, watching sadly as he walked away, wishing she had given him the answer he had obviously been hoping for. That he seemed visibly upset surprised her. She still had trouble believing that he enjoyed the company of a mere Zarcon.
Depressed at her own stupidity, she slowly ascended the steps to her room, returned inside, stripped off her clothes, leaving them in a pile on the floor, then tumbled naked into bed. Disappointed at how things had gone with Uri, she turned over and, sniffing, yanked the covers over her head, feeling like an idiot. Her heart felt heavy in her chest because of Uri"s unexpected coldness towards her. Crying quietly, afraid he wouldn"t want anything more to do with her now, she eventually fell asleep, unaware of those who returned later to clear the dinner table. Nor was she aware of the invisible being who came to her room in the wee hours of the morning to check on her safety, as if afraid he would not find her there.