Split his souls and make the key.
Like a nightmare, still in purgatory.
Mo Xi didn't even know how all this was going on step by step.
He seemed to be dead.
He seemed to see his soul floating to the top of the tent, looking down on the two people in the tent. He saw what he had done and watched Gu Mang's blood flow out of his chest wound when he took the souls. However, the young man who was dissected said to him, "It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter."
Many years ago, Gu Shixiong was smiling in front of the bonfire and told him that he hoped that Kyushu would be promoted to a higher level, and that everyone would have a fair share. He was willing to go through fire and water for
it.
Now, it was like a curse.
The key finally condensed into a sapphire ring, was held by Mo Xi, shivering to
Gu Mang's palm. Then he used all the healing techniques he could to heal Gu Mang's scar and wipe the mottled blood. The tears were like broken beads finally mixed with blood drop by drop.
Gu Mang could not help coughing. He should have fainted because of the pain of his soul being cut. But he kept trying to open his clear eyes and looked at his face without blinking.
He knew that he had lost his two spirits, and his last memory and reason would soon disintegrate. For him, pain was the taste he had been used to, and what he had been experiencing at the moment when he was carrying the mission of a spy.
He could endure, and look at his younger brother more soberly for a while - he knew that his life was selfless, that was to himself. But he had always been selfish to Mo Xi. He gave all his blood, life, and soul to the peaceful world he longed for. What he left for Mo Xi was always his parting.
Perhaps only at this moment, he, who was about to lose his memory six years ago, and Mo Xi, who would leave here six years later, would have the sincerity and peace that they couldn't hope for all their lives.
Mo Xi was still trying to heal the scar on his chest. Gu Mang held his hand and his pale face showed a trace of smile. He said, "Don't waste your strength any more… Don't worry. I'll be fine."
"You know, Mo Xi, I can't die easily… Do you think Liao Jun didn't try to kill me? Do you think the emperor hasn't tried to assassinate me?"
"They didn't kill me because, as they said, I changed so much that they didn't know what would happen after I died. They've tried it for a long time, just… All… Cough… They all failed. They knew very well that I was integrated with the blood demon beast. Only when it died, I would die with it, so... " He stopped and gasped, "Shidi, you don't have to heal my wounds for me..."
"Talk to me for a while… I just want to talk to you again… OK? How about that?"
Mo Xi held out his bloody hand and placed it on his cheek. After a while, he choked and said, "OK."
Gu Mang laughed. When he laughed, he always had a kind of vigor and wildness, even at this time.
Mo Xi said hoarsely, "What do you want to talk about?"
"It's nothing..."
Gu Mang looked up at the top of the tent. There was a small starry sky.
"It's… I just want to tell you, I'm sorry. Mo Xi, I… Is it… Am I too selfish? I didn't tell you too much truth, and you..."
"And you, have always spoken from the bottom of your heart..."
Mo Xi shook his head and said, "I know you have to."
I know how difficult it was for you to float between truth and falsehood as a spy.
Over his head, Gu Mang saw the dim side of his eyes. "Shidi…"
He reached out his hand and tried to touch Mo Xi's face, but he didn't have much strength. So Mo Xi took his hand, kissed it, and brought it to his cheek.
Gu Mang looked at him for a while, his eyes red.
They didn't talk to each other for a long time, but they understood everything.
Gu Mang suddenly closed his eyes, tears rolling down.
"I am cruel to you after all..."
Mo Xi choked, "You have to, and I… I will."
"I know you have your own dream, I know what you are thinking… You have tried your best to do well… It's us… I can't fight for the sky... "
Gu Mang did not say anything.
He looked at the little starry sky again for a moment.
For a moment, he asked, "But I've been competing… competing with the sky... " "I know..."
"We didn't, did we?"
Mo Xi paused a moment. "What?"
"Those brothers who died in vain at Fengming mountain… Have you fought?"
Gu Mang opened his moist eyes and nervously turned to look at him, "They all… Have they all been vindicated... "
The voice was lighter. "Zhanxing… He, he… Has he also been vindicated..."
Mo Xi understood what he meant, but it didn't make him feel good. He clenched his hand tightly, turned his face to kiss him, and nodded incessantly.
"Yes, you took them home… They weren't wrong to call you Gu Shuai. Lu Zhanxing, me… Never..." Mo Xi slowed down for a while, and his throat was choked with grief. He could not say more words for a moment, "Never… Thank you, Xiongdi... "
"Do you know we're making a vow..."
Mo Xi lowered his eyelashes stained with tears.
"I'm sorry, I haven't treated him well."
Gu Mang suddenly smiled. His smile was very real. He seemed to get rid of haggard and bloodless face, there wasn't much difference between him and the Gu Mang from the past.
"It doesn't matter. Zhanxing really liked you… He didn't hate you, I know." After a pause, "Murong Lian… What about Murong Lian? Did he abuse himself again?"
"No..."
Gu Mang seemed to be relieved again.
Finally, his clear eyes focused on Mo Xi. With some care, he inquired almost uneasily inquired. "Mo Xi, these years, when I lost my memory… Was it painful for you?"
"..."
"I made you sick, didn't I?"
The color in those eyes was about to be broken into a lake and a sea of sadness. Mo Xi looked at the bright and withered face, and looked at the stars in Gu Mang's eyes. How would he like it?
"No," he said.
"Really… Is it?"
"Yes." He choked and laughed. He wanted to ignite the stars in his eyes again.
He said, "It's true. Even if you lose two souls and no memory, you will treat me…
You are still good to me… You never, never made me feel bad… It's all true."
"In my heart, have you always been a very good person?"
Mo Xi said, "All the time."
Perhaps seeing the hesitation in Gu Mang's expression, Mo Xi wanted to comfort him, so he said, "You remember me more or less… I've left you some thoughts and stayed by your side, so you didn't forget me completely…"
In order to prove what he said, he wanted to find something from his body and give it to Gu Mang.
But he came down from the battlefield. He had nothing but the reversal stone that he had to take away. At the same time, he saw something soft with his fingertips. He was stunned by the moonlight.
What he touched was the brocade bag used to hold the reverse stone.
He was eager to go back to the past. He took Jiang Fuli's brocade bag and did not take a close look at it. At this time, he saw clouds embroidered with golden silk, rivers and mountains embroidered with silver thread, and the bottom was decorated with red stone agate.
This is… This is…
The distant memory was knocked at this moment. When we met again in the Luomei garden, this is the brocade that Gu Mang was guarding stubbornly!
When he first saw the fabric, he was so angry because Gu Mang held it and said to him, "There is someone who is good to me."
He gave me this brocade bag.
Stunned, Mo Xi's blood went cold. Suddenly understanding the arrangement of fate, he was even more sad. His heart was like night.
His throat was so bitter that he tried to bear it. He didn't let himself fall into tears again… It turned out that the man who he had been envious of because of Gu Mang's sachet was actually himself.
After Gu Mang lost his mind, he didn't forget…
He himself!
It has always been him, only him…
"What's the matter with you?"
"... No, nothing." Mo Xi pressed his own exuberant sadness. Carefully, with trembling fingers, he untied the sachet on his waist and put it in Gu Mang's palm.
Gu Mang looked at it and laughed. "Is this the keepsake? I did not remember anything, nor did I remember you?"
"... Yes"
"Then I… I'll leave you a token, too."
Gu Mang finished speaking, groping around his person. But what would be on a prisoner's body? What he finally found was just two small white shells.
Gu Mang urged the weak spiritual power to write his name on one of the shell coins and handed it to Mo Xi. "Here you are. No matter what you will face after going back, I will accompany you."
Then, he wanted to write down the name of Mo Xi on another shell coin and wanted to collect it by himself.
However, he soon thought that he was about to face Murong Lian, Murong Chen and Chonghua's most severe torture. He could not carry with him a shell coin with the name of Mo Xi, so he finished only "fire" in the middle of writing, and stopped without the character "rest."31
He carefully put the white shell coin into the brocade bag and said, "That's enough."
He laughed. "I'll remember you."
...
At this point, all of Mo Xi's questions about the brocade bag were finally solved.
And the wave of sadness, was also finally destroyed like heaven and earth——
Mo Xi remembered that before Gu Mang died, he once opened the brocade bag that Gu Mang treasured. At that time, he saw the shells in the brocade bag.
The shell was mottled with the word "fire."
At that time, he couldn't help but ask, "Who gave you this?"
Gu Mang said he didn't know.
He just remembered, it was a very important person for him.
"Mo Xi..." Gu Mang looked at his expression, raised his hand, and patted him on the shoulder.
He knew that his lucid time was running out. He also knew that the time for Mo Xi to return to the future was getting closer and closer. He could feel the gradual chaos of his consciousness, and he could also see that his body was shining slightly and started to become transparent little by little.
This was another farewell between them. He tried to comfort him as before, and to inspire the hero who was about to return to the battlefield. In fact, they both wanted to have a home and become a couple. They had no desire to be famous and make contributions.
The reason why he chose to be a hero wasn't because he felt excited, proud, or that there was something great about it.
But they had tasted too much bitterness and separation. He didn't want to let others also experience such pain, that's all.
"Mo Xi, go back."
Gu Mang whispered to him, and then dropped his hand, clasped the gradually faded finger of Mo Xi, and made the last effort to hold it.
No one answered him. Just when he thought that Mo Xi might have been influenced by the reversal stone and began to return to the future, and could not hear his own words, he suddenly found his shoulder trembling slightly.
Gu Mang was stunned and dumb. "Shidi..."
Mo Xi did not speak, as if there was some very important life flame extinguished in his body.
At time that the Mo family had lost its power and its future was uncertain, Mo Xi sat alone outside the excitement of the soldiers.
At that time, except for Gu Mang, no one wanted to associate with his contaminated family.
No one had ever given the little gongzi who lost his power even a smiling face.
Gu Mang had such a moment, wanting to hold Mo Xi again and tell him, it doesn't matter, he is still there, he will not leave. But he soon learned that he had no right to say that again. Mo Xi had lost his Gu Mang Gege in the future.
No one could compete with him to fight against the world and return to the same goal hand in hand.
"I'm sorry..."
Mo Xi closed his eyes and shook his head. He was not a good talkative lover. He was stupid and honest. He could not say anything satisfying. He could just so clumsily understand him, respect him, hold him.
Finally, he silently picked up the small shell Gu Mang gave him and placed it in the lapel, the place closest to the heart.
Keep it.
After that, he wanted to get up and imagine that he was as straight and calm as he had been every time he left. But in the end, he didn't do it. He walked like he had his ribs broken, his heart crushed, his heart removed… He bent down because of excessive heartache, and buried himself slowly. Finally, in this past that could not be changed, in the aftermath of this defeat, he finally sobbed.
His relationship with Gu Mang lasted for nearly twenty years. However, because of the superiority and inferiority of nobles and slaves, the contradiction between spies and generals, gender, morality, and other reasons, he was always not respected. He was always in the dark and had no commitment. In the end, Gu Mang even chose to sacrifice himself and didn't come back to him - but Mo Xi knew that Gu Mang really loved him for nearly half his life.
As a spy of the empire, Gu Shuai had spent almost all his blood and life in order to keep these secrets. The only remaining residual temperature, the broken time and the sincerity were all to Mo Xi.
Gu Mang's affection for him was not inferior to his loyalty, affection and selflessness of any one in the world to his partner.
But his lover, the one he loved, because of his identity as a spy, in the end, even if he dared not or could not write down a complete name, he stealthily wrote down an incomplete name.
That through time and space, the brocade bag only held a shell coin with the word "fire."
That was the only token between them.
There was nothing else.
They wanted to say something more to each other, but at this time, Mo Xi suddenly felt a dizzy blackness in front of him. The magic power of the reversal stone reached the extreme, and it was hot in his hands.
He couldn't help calling him for the last time. "Gu Mang...!"
Gu Mang looked at him quietly. There were tears in his blue eyes, but he was smiling.
At the last moment before losing consciousness, Mo Xi heard the sound of swift steps outside the tent, and the voice of his disciples. "Wangshu Jun!"
"Welcome Wangshu Jun!"
He knew that he was going to leave, and Murong Lian would come in at this moment. The cycle of fate was still running cruelly according to the established track, and he was about to return to the bloody battlefield six years later.
The reversal stone was a deception of gods and mortals. Nothing in the past had changed.
At the last moment he left, what he saw was Gu Mang raising his hand and sticking the shell with half of his name on his lapel, the position closest to the heart where the blood was not dried.
Gu Mang looked at him. He did not speak, but that pair of eyes already expressed his infinite affection.
Mo Xi, Shidi.
Go ahead. No matter whether my memory is clear or not, whether the years are long or not, in my heart, I will keep my affection for you. I'm sorry, I can't accompany you all the time. I can't speak to you without reservation. Even in the future, I'll hide from you, lie to you, and then go to death alone.
I regret that this life has implicated you and failed you.
But I never… I never regret loving you.
Go back, Mo Xi.
I hope in the future, we will wait for that reunion in the rain, that I once dreamt of.