After I was free from getting the rape kit done. I threatened suicide. My cases workers wanted my mother to wait with me at the hospital because they were tired. Legally they couldnt but they didnt believe me and told my mother they trusted her to watch me. My mother denied their request. She left.
The case worker Margaret was pissed. She told me to say I no longer felt like killing myself so she could go home. I did because I just wanted to leave. Little did I know I was going to a children's home. She put me in the back of the mans car and told me she would see me again at 18. I didnt know what she meant. She was a vile being to say the least. Ive seen her once since then and she makes me physically nauseous. There is no reason for her to be a social worker. She doesnt protect children she treats us like shit.
I hope her food is bland and dry for the rest of her life.
The drive was two hours we had small talk and then I fell asleep. I didnt know anything about this place but I knew I wasnt going to like it. I wanted my mom. I hated her for not leaving her boyfriend and having me go to this place.
I just wanted someone to believe me and protect me. That was too much to ask. I began to really miss Dale during that time. I missed Sadie too. My life was simpler back then. I was loved and I had a home where I felt safe. I missed waking up to Sadie making breakfast and Dale in his favorite chair with his Koosh ball. Thinking back on them made my heart ache. I had to replace the feeling with rage. I wanted to feel safe in a loving home but every person who was suppose to do that failed me. It was just me, myself, and I.
I just hope that I survive this childrens home.