''I'm doomed. I am inside the freaking novel!'' Cereza walked back and forth in the empress' room which is basically also her room.
''This is ridiculous! Unbelievable!'' She exclaimed, biting her thumbs. Honestly, she was scared. She knew well how Cereza Tyrell's life will end. The seemingly insignificant character dies all because to portray the evilness of her father in the novel - the strongest enemy of the protagonists.
She couldn't accept the fact that she was transmigrated in her body, ''Why me of all people?''
It's true that she sympathized with the character but her life was already hard to live in reality. The least she could wish is to experience a hellish life like the empress'
''I had read transmigration and reincarnation novels but I don't think they did happen in real life. And even if it did, I never expected it will happen to me! I'm not like those badass and cool transmigrators who could instantly command waves and storms and change everything in the novel at their will,'' Cereza freaked out.
A week had passed after the incident since the empress drowned in the lake. That's when her soul mysteriously possessed the empress' body. No one still knew what happened and why did the empress fell. Cereza doesn't have any idea as well. The empress was a mere side character, so the author of the ''Emperor's Beloved Consort'' novel only wrote things related to the main characters. Furthermore, she doesn't have her memories, only her memories from the real world, and her knowledge about the book is what she could remember.
''Argh! This is stressful as dealing with my father.''
Remembering him, the only good thing she gained from her transmigration is to finally escape from her manipulating father. Sadly, another one or much worse based on what she had read will replace him.
Now that she possessed her body, Cereza wondered what happened to the empress' soul. Did they switch bodies? Then how was the life of the empress living in her body?
And one of the most important questions right now is, how she can come back to her original life?
It's true that her father is a manipulator but she endured it for years. She had no intention of living a life controlled by her father forever. So, while enduring the struggle she was moving silently to build her life.
Silent as the grave.
Stealth as a rat.
Wise as a serpent.
While in front of him she acted like an obedient sheep, a good daughter that he always wants.
Behind his back. She was slowly building her own million-dollar business and she assume after a year, it would be completely stabilized. She can now live on her own away from her father.
The dreams she had painstakingly built were so close for her to reach. She could still endure for a short period of time, just a little more and she could finally be free.
''How could life be so cruel to me?'' She could only complain and feel frustrated. Cereza worked hard risking her life to gain freedom. But now, does she have to suffer again? It was like she was cursed to eternal struggle, manipulated like a puppet for the sake of someone's greater purpose.
"Will all my efforts be wasted?" She clenched and unclenched her fist.
Since the day her body recovered, she secretly found her way to go back to the real world.
Her solution?
Death.
She tried to poison herself but everyone would miraculously find out and instantly summon a doctor. Then she tried to kill herself by slitting her wrist in the middle of the night but Lilith suddenly showed up and stopped her. She went back to the lake again and drowned herself but out of nowhere, Sean showed up and rescued her. The next day, every lake and even the fountains inside and outside the palace were dried out. Then her next resolve was to let herself be lost in the woods, hoping she would meet wild animals and devour her to death. In her dismay, the security around her got tighter. She was about to reach the middle part of the forest when the elite knights easily found her. Because of her actions, she was locked inside her palace. She was grounded. Her every move was closely monitored by everyone be it Lilith and the maids, Sean and the knights, as well as her father and the emperor.
She was completely hopeless.
''I'm going crazy! I wanna die. Please, let me die.'' Drained of all the energy, she slumped herself in her king-size bed. Turning her body to the side, her lifeless emerald eyes looked over at the large closed window across her room.
A sudden burst of wind came and it made the white muslin curtain fluttered in the air. In that short moment, Cereza saw something outside that large window which led her to stand and jumped on her feet.
''A balcony! I'm really stupid. How could I only think about it this time?'' She grinned as if she finally found a treasure she had been searching for so long.
Come to think of it, Lilith was not in her room because the head maid called for her but she knew it was just a matter of time before her maid returned. Sean and the knights were not allowed to enter her room because it would be disrespectful unless she allowed it.
''Perfect!'' She clapped her hands and parted the white curtains.
She saw two carved phoenix knobs attached to the large doors that lead to the balcony. She twisted, push and pull the knobs but nothing works. She got anxious every second that passes because once Lilith stepped inside the room she had no chance.
''The key. Where is the key?'' She grunted in annoyance.
She anxiously searched her drawers and to the places where the former Cereza possibly hid the key. Until she peeked through the end of bookshelves and behind those large leather books, there was a box made of iron with lilies intricately carved around its body.
She doesn't know why she was certain that the key was there, maybe, it was the instinct of the empress' body.
''This is it. Cereza, you should act faster!'' She said to herself.
Her hands pushed the books aside and pulled out the metal box. She heaved a sigh of relief when she found out it was not locked.
''There it is!'' She rejoiced because. Her intuition was right. The key was there. It had a similar phoenix carved on it, just like what was carved on the doorknobs so she recognized it right away.
She ran to the large door leading to the balcony, twisted the key on the metal hole specifically made fit for it.
The sound of the doorknob, clicking, was satisfying to her ears.
She opened the door and chuckled, ''I didn't know that opening a door could be so dramatic!'' She rolled her eyes at her thoughts.
But her laid-back demeanor vanished instantly when she looked down below the balcony.
''Omg! It's so high. Once I jumped I'll surely die.'' But isn't it what she wanted all along? Hoping her death could take her back to where she came from.
Cereza pinched hard her cheeks to pull herself together. ''Ow! That actually hurts. Anyway, Let's do this and go back home.''
Eyes full of determination, she slowly stood on top of the marble rails of the balcony. She closed her eyes once she had a firm footing. She clutched her chest as her heart beat fast. Her breath was rising and falling and her body was trembling.
It's true that she wanted to die but she was afraid of how she would die. Maybe because of the pain?
All along, the pain was part of her life because of the constant abuse she received from her father. And she was also well aware that it was the same to the empress. However, she still couldn't get used to it no matter how long she was enduring everything. She may act like she was numb to it but in fact, that is her biggest fear. She was trying so hard to escape from it. All she wished for was a decent and free life, sadly, it remained an unattainable dream. Even her wealth couldn't obtain it. Is she that so unlucky?
'I'll do this. I have to go back home. I'll die anyway after two years so why wait and suffer more. I'm already tired, she thought to herself.
She decided to count to ready herself, and at the count of three…
Cereza will jump to die.
She began.
One.
She breathed heavily.
Two.
Her heart beats like a drum.
And…
Three.
Without second thoughts, she let herself fall free. She felt the rush of the wind harshly slap her face, reminding her how cruel life could be.
Truthfully, deep inside her heart, she knew once she came back she would face her hellish life again. But at least, the time she would need to endure is shorter and her dreams, the things she built for her own freedom was so close for her to reach.
'Cereza, everything will be fine,' she said to herself as she awaited her body to be crushed on the ground.
However, seconds and minutes had passed but she couldn't feel the ground and her body was still intact. And the harsh wind slapping her face stopped. But wait, instead, she could feel…
''So warm…'' She mumbled. She could feel a warm yet firm embrace-like enveloped her body. It was the strange feeling she thought she won't ever experience in her life. She felt secure.
''Am I dead? I guess this is what heaven feels like,'' she said, mumbling while her eyes remain closed.
Cough. Cough.
''Hmm, I guess you're fine now, your majesty?'' Suddenly, Cereza heard a deep melodious voice and it startled her.
''Who?!'' She freaked out as she opened her eyes.
''Sadly, you're not dead yet.''
Once her eyes opened, a pair of red eyes met hers. The person was staring at her as if looking through her soul.
But what Cereza noticed is the person's appearance. Her jaw could literally drop as she stare at her and became ost at her otherworldly beauty.
Under the moonlight, her long smooth silver hair shined beautifully like no other. Her dark-red eyes glistened like a magnificent ruby stone. Cereza was sure it was capable of capturing every heart, either men or women. But it could make anyone tremble in fear at the sight of it, as those pair glint, sharp as the edges of a dagger.
''A beautiful goddess! You can take me now. I will die happily ~'' She sang and clapped her hands. Cereza thought that she was an angel or some spiritual being from the afterlife that will guide her dead soul so she said those words mindlessly loud.
But the woman frowned deeply, ''So the rumors are true. The empress had gone insane.''
''Eh? What did you say?''
''It was a pretty sight to see a Tyrell desperately want to die,'' a chuckle escaped from the woman's lips.
''What?!'' Cereza gasped. Tyrell? Empress?
'Oh no!' Her eyes looked away from the woman's breathtaking face and looked around her.
She also realized that she was carried in a bridal style by the silver-haired woman she referred to as a goddess. She was surprised at how strong and tall she is.
However, realizing her situation made Cereza gravely disappointed.
''Your majesty, forgive my impertinence but can I ask… why do you want to die?'' The woman carefully inquired as she gently lay her down. Cereza could feel the warmth in her embrace and somehow she wanted more.
''It's my only hope,'' she smiled, not too little yet not too much.
''Funny, how you could see death as your hope when once there's no hope left, that's when someone has a strong desire to die.''
''It's true but dying is my only hope…to escape,'' Cereza said as she looked down. ''Now that death is impossible, I'm completely hopeless. So what should I do now?''
''Maybe, the more you pursue it the more it won't come. Our life is like that. It feels like everything is a game and someone was manipulating the threads attached to us behind the scenes, just like the puppets in a play.'' The woman said while leading Cereza to a bench nearby and urge her to sit beside her.
''Puppets?''
The woman nodded. Cereza remembered the life of the original empress in the book. She realized she was just like a puppet controlled by her father, her family. However, she is not alone. Every character in the novel is a puppet whose life is controlled at the author's will.
She suddenly felt bad for all of them. But for the author and to the readers including her, they're just fictional characters that were created for a story to happen - well, mostly for the readers' pleasure or entertainment. If the author didn't make the protagonists and the villains just the way they are. There is no interesting plot. There is no story.
''But still, everyone tried to live and hope. They may struggle but they at least put a fight, not for everyone else but for themselves.'' The woman said and it pulled her out of her reverie.
''But I'm tired to fight,'' Cereza answered as she looked at the woman beside her. She thought she can't believe this woman is a mere character inside a novel. She wondered what is her role.
''Did you win?'' She asked.
Cereza sighed in defeat,'' Nope. Not even once.''
''Then your fight is not over yet. Tired? Take a rest because after that you'll have the strength to start all over again until you win.''
''No. You don't understand. I'm tired already!''
''Your majesty, there are always a winner and a loser to war, right?. Then it just means every fight was meant to be lost and meant to be won.''
''You don't understand me and…I don't understand you,'' she complained but the woman merely looked at her. After a brief moment of silence between them, she gently touched her cheeks.
''Hey! W-What are you doing?'' She asked but she didn't know why she suddenly became flustered just because of it.
''Maybe your right, your majesty. But you said you don't win even once. That's why your fight was not over yet. You only accumulated losses then it means what was coming is your victory.''
Cereza didn't know if it is an illusion, but the woman's gaze softened. She just felt like she was the typical stoic cold person who doesn't show much emotions.
''Fight once again, even if it means changing the original course of the story of the play. I would also do it if I were you. To survive and live the life I always dreamed but never have.''
Fight to live my dream? Change the course of the story? Cereza didn't know why but her words became like a single burning torch inside a dark cave she was roaming around for years without any light and where she can't see a way out.
She smiled and took her hands on her lap. ''Thank you so much for saving me. I'm happy I'm alive.''
The woman's red eyes widened and a slight tint of pink appeared on her cheeks.
She was taken aback by the sudden action of the empress.
''May I know your name, lady?'' She asked her as she could see sparks of light in her clear emerald eyes.
''It's Thalassa, your majesty.,'' The silver-haired lady stand up and curtsied as she introduced herself.
''Thalassa? Sounds familiar. It's a beautiful name just like you,'' the empress said, smiling with pure innocence.
''Now that I saw you again, your majesty. I can finally confirm you truly have amnesia. You don't even remember me!'' A smirk appeared on her beautiful face.
Cereza can't help but admire her and turn on her fangirl mode.
'Her face was truly a work of art even her smirking, look so…hot!' She thought.
''Your majesty?''
''Ah! Yes, I do have. It happens,'' the empress smiled shyly.
'Gosh! I have to keep myself in check whenever I'm around her or else I would embarrass myself for staring at her like that. That would be creepy!' She mentally smacked herself for getting lost staring at the beauty in front of her.
''Uhm…well, from what family are you? Since I can't remember, please do inform me and I deeply apologize for troubling you.''
''It's perfectly fine, your majesty. To respond to your majesty's question, I came from the home of the brave knights, protectors of the land of Adarra, House of Laurel.''
''W-Wait, what?!''
Cereza wanted to scream and she did, internally. 'I'm a perfect idiot!'
Her smile froze. How could she not recognize, her otherworldly beauty, her distinct ruby eyes, and long silver hair? Wondering what is her role? She's the most important person in the novel - the protagonist herself.
Thalassa Yvonne laurel.
'Great, self! Congratulations you'll just stumble upon on the freaking landmine.'