The fact that he was being unconsciously held by Su Ranqiu on the road for a full two minutes was a degree of boredom that could be said to be very taxing on Qin Yuyang's nerves.
He couldn't help but recall the unrestrained freedom of being single, or whatever it was called.
"Xiao-Qiu, get in the car first, I bought you food." Qin Yuyang pinched him and suggested, paying extra attention to his tone as not to sound spiteful.
Younger boys falling in love for the first time would all be like this.
"Oh." Su Ranqiu separated from Qin Yuyang's arms and sat in the car with a bit of shyness. "You really bought the soufflé from there, huh?" He was pleasantly surprised when he saw it.
He also felt a little distressed as he asked, "But it's expensive, isn't it?"
One may cost tens or even hundreds of yuan.
That was how much he used to make in a day at his part-time job, so it still hurt a little to eat it.
"Do you need to be in charge of this?" Qin Yuyang buckled his seat belt and stuffed the snack box into the arms of the smaller boy next to him. "Eat it when you're hungry."
"Mm."
Twenty or so was still the stage of maturing, and it was true that he'd get hungry from noon till now.
Su Ranqiu opened the box and taking advantage of the fact that Qin Yuyang hadn't driven yet, he took one out and fed it to the other's mouth first. "I'll give you a bite."
Qin Yuyang looked at the small snack that he could swallow in one bite. "…" While displaying a tangled look, he took a small bite in a gentle manner.
"Is it delicious?" Su Ranqiu expectantly looked at him with both eyes.
"Mm." Qin – who tasted nothing – Yuyang nodded his head insincerely.
"I also think it's delicious." Su Ranqiu shyly bit the other half of his boyfriend's leftover piece and finished it in three bites.
Yesterday, when Qin Yuyang said he was going to make a trip home, not once did Su Ranqiu actually think that he'd return.
He couldn't find a single thing about himself that was worthy of keeping Qin Yuyang's attention. To put it objectively, people like him could be found all over the street.
But Qin Yuyang came back still as gentle as ever, it really put his heart at ease.
"When you went home yesterday, you didn't have a fight with your family, right?" Su Ranqiu asked cautiously, casting a worried glance to the side.
"There was no quarrel," Qin Yuyang answered. "I went back and just got scolded."
Su Ranqiu was quiet, but the distress was clearly written with his expression.
Qin Yuyang found it funny, so he teased him on a whim, "If you're so worried, then will you comfort me at home?"
"Okay." Su Ranqiu agreed without thinking.
Though Qin Yuyang didn't take it seriously. Later, when they reached the alleyway, he let Su Ranqiu get off first and then started searching for a place to park the car.
When he entered the apartment, Su Ranqiu was already in the kitchen. Saying nothing, Qin Yuyang went straight to the bedroom and fished out his phone to watch the rise and fall of his small stock.
Su Ranqiu knew that Qin Yuyang had come in. Finishing the kitchen work, he washed his hands, and calmly walked out.
"What for?" Qin Yuyang was watching attentively when the lower half of his body suddenly felt cold in the next three seconds.
Throwing the phone down to take a look, he saw a pair of cowardly hands commit murder in broad daylight. The timid person shrank back as soon as he opened his mouth.
"Didn't you say you wanted me to comfort you?" Su Ranqiu blushed yet, both shyly and boldly, he shoved his hands back.
Only then did Qin Yuyang remember that he'd indeed asked something like that. "Then you can do whatever you want." Since the other party was willing to service, a grown man like himself was naturally generous enough to let someone serve him.
"Hmm." Seeing that his boyfriend had picked up his phone again to look at it, Su Ranqiu stumbled yet continued working.
Qin Yuyang watched and was shocked. "Fuck…" Isn't this kid just doing that!
He paused to block Su Ranqui's forehead and questioned, "What are you doing?"
"…" Such an obvious thing, Su Ranqiu blushed and fidgeted for half a day, not knowing how to answer. He definitely thought that Qin Yuyang was asking him on purpose.
"I didn't ask you to do this," Qin Yuyang stated annoyingly.
"Isn't it…" Su Ranqiu looked startled and was at a loss.
"You don't need to force yourself." How would he explain this matter… Either way, Qin Yuyang felt quite bad trampling on people. Except for a money boy who a person spent money on to buy, normal people who dated didn't do this.
"I'm not reluctant…" Su Ranqiu lowered his eyes and whispered.
"Nonsense." Qin Yuyang slapped him away and tried to move somewhere stable.
Hurriedly, Su Ranqiu hugged him and didn't let go. "I'm not forcing myself, I really like you." If Qin Yuyang refused, he'd be even more upset.
"You're really not forcing yourself?" Qin Yuyang couldn't believe it.
"Really," Su Ranqiu emphasized with shame and stressed hard.
"Alright…" Qin Yuyang silently muttered in his heart: I don't understand the world you're living in.
The smaller boy would start showing signs of unhappiness if Qin Yuyang didn't let him do as he pleased, and since Su Ranqiu was willing to, he allowed the boy to do whatever he wanted to do to him.
Dinner was served late that evening.
"I'm still full," Su Ranqiu said in a good mood.
Beside him, Qin Yuyang, who hadn't been able to ease his expression since he entered the door, was completely shocked.
"What are you thinking?" Su Ranqiu accidentally saw Qin Yuyang's eyes and immediately whacked him. "I mean I already ate a snack!"
Qin Yuyang was fed another yellow stalk by his little object, "…I wasn't thinking much about it." That was true, but Su Ranqiu reminded him of 'that', so his thoughts were stained to the point of becoming a mess.
Going to sleep late that night, Su Ranqiu put down his books and climbed onto the bed before squinting at Qin Yuyang with a smile and saying, "Good night."
Qin Yuyang didn't look back. "Well, good night."
"Don't you… want to kiss me?" Su Ranqiu paused the movement of his lips nearby, his face was filled with loss.
"…" Instead, Qin Yuyang turned around and collapsed, completely dodging Su Ranqiu once he saw his hazy face.
"You actually dislike me?" Su Ranqiu was sad and surprised, he hadn't expected Qin Yuyang to mind.
He had read in a novel that men enjoyed being like this.
The interest in 'comforting' Qin Yuyang today indeed stemmed partly from his own willingness, but it was more because he'd wanted to please his boyfriend.
In exchange for such a result, Su Ranqiu was left a bit shocked.
He lay down without saying a word, staring at the ceiling in the darkness.
Acting cheap in order to hold on to the other man these past few days was getting a little too much.
What was up for the rush was worthless, he already knew that.
"Xiao-Qiu?" Qin Yuyang believed the two of them were joking around, but Su Ranqiu hadn't moved in so long it made him feel that something was wrong.
"What is it?" Su Ranqiu cleared his throat and replied with his usual voice when he spoke with others— it was cold and flat.
Qin Yuyang realized he'd created a big misunderstanding and immediately embraced the boy. "I don't dislike you." In order to prove that he didn't lie, he wordlessly pinched Su Ranqiu's chin and gave him a kiss. "I was joking with you, poking fun, you understand?"
"…" Su Ranqiu immediately understood that he'd just overthought. He couldn't even go along with his boyfriend's typical joke and felt bad.
Because of his own low self-esteem, he couldn't even stand a little windfall…
"Still angry?" Qin Yuyang tapped him a few more times, each tap more intimate than the last.
"No, I'm just mad at myself…" Su Ranqiu sullenly said.
"Then I won't joke around anymore." Qin Yuyang rubbed him with chagrin. "Xiao-Qiu, I want you to be cheerful."
The latter phrase, 'cheerful', poked straight at his heart.
"It's not your fault." Su Ranqiu's eyes turned red and he choked in his lover's generous embrace.
In the past, he hadn't cried when he was looked down upon, or when he was kept in the house by his mother. Nor had he cried when he grew up working for a living, but now he really wanted to.
As a big 'straight' man of steel, Qin Yuyang silently pulled out two paper tissues and handed it to his little boyfriend.
"Thank you." These past few days, Su Ranqiu felt like he'd fallen into a dream, a dream where everyone around him was awake and only he didn't want to wake up.
"Do you really like me?" His voice blurred as he covered his pert eyes with a tissue.
"Like." Qin Yuyang was lucky that the other party wasn't asking if he loved him, but rather if he liked him or not.
Of course he liked Su Ranqiu, otherwise, how could he roll together with him in the bed?
But when it came to love, in his entire life, Qin Yuyang had never loved anyone before. He must honestly admit that it didn't matter who was at his side, whether it was Su Ranqiu or someone else.
It was just something that happened to be good for Su Ranqiu's well-being, so he'd made the decision.
Regardless of the unlikeliness, if there came to be a person who Qin Yuyang truly loved in the future, if he really encountered such a situation, he'd resolve to truthfully inform Su Ranqiu that he loved someone else and break up with him. After all, they could no longer continue to be together.
Su Ranqiu slept in a trance, resting on the words that made him feel at ease.
The next morning he found that his eyes were a little red and puffy. He was embarrassed and didn't like the fact that he'd become vulnerable because of love.
"Xiao-Qiu?" Qin Yuyang came in.
"Huh?" Su Ranqiu was still in a daze.
"You're about to be late for class," Qin Yuyang told him as he went to drain the water while looking like he hadn't fully woken up.
"Gege," Su Ranqiu called after him.
"Hm?" Qin Yuyang turned his head.
A minty flavor leaped into his nose as the little boy placed a refreshing kiss on his handsome chin.
This sweet little gesture… made Qin Yuyang feel an electric current from the sole of his foot all the way up to his brain; straight through his lower half where his little Yuyang suddenly saluted solemnly.
Only then did he take a closer look at Xiao-Qiu who was standing in front of him; a clean boy dressed in a style of young but cheap clothes. He had a short, fresh haircut and double eyelids that adorned a small face which his buddies liked.
"Good boy." Qin Yuyang rubbed his head.
This little boy, he really was quite adorable.
Since he'd moved in here, the other had always waited to serve him food and drinks, even his under… pants were washed by the youth.
Qin Yuyang pointed to himself in the mirror and thought: if you bully this person in the future, you're not a fucking human being.
"Let's go, it's already this late, Gege will send you to school." He got dressed and helped Su Ranqiu lift his school bag.
"Really?" Su Ranqiu put on his shoes and looked at the time, he was indeed a bit late today.
He happily got into Qin Yuyang's car and ate the hand cakes bought from the roadside. For the first time, he felt that Uncle Xu Wei's song1 was quite good.
Qin Yuyang suddenly said, "Xiao-Qiu, you dawdled on purpose, didn't you? Were you just waiting for me to take you to school?"Seeing Su Ranqiu's mouth freeze in amazement, Qin Yuyang's heart felt remorse. It was only just last night that he said he wasn't going to make jokes anymore. This stupid mouth of his suddenly became fucking dishonest so early in the morning.
"No, I didn't mean that," he hurriedly tried to explain.
"It's okay," Su Ranqiu continued while chuckling, "You can say whatever you want, it's fine to joke around as much as you desire." Very soon I'll definitely be able to cooperate with your jokes, he thought to himself smilingly.