I didn't get to work in the kitchen very often. For one, the cooks didn't like it. It was their domain and even the Monster Lord herself was not welcome. Secondly, Alice herself felt it was not appropriate for the Monster Lord's husband to work in the kitchens. Coming from a more egalitarian society and trying to make my adopted world more egalitarian as well, I put up a fight, but as usual I tended to back down. But not today. I put my foot down on this one day.
You see, it was Thanksgiving. Actually, it probably wasn't. I never could figure out what day it was on my home world because of the damned time differences, which couldn't even have the courtesy to be consistent. Unless I'd just visited my world days ago, I couldn't even tell you what month it was back home.
No, since Alice had designated an arbitrary day as my birthday, I was going to designate an arbitrary day as Thanksgiving. Because in ten years, we had never eaten a meal all together, as a family. I'd tried asking to have one scheduled, but the prospect of castle food was not sufficient to draw all four Knights. The prospect of my cooking, however, had them all agreeing eagerly. I opened up the dinner to all guests who wanted to come, although I wanted a private dining experience with Alice, the Knights, my closest co-workers, and my children. Other guests were welcome to drop in later on, and Alice had informed me that there had been many RSVPs.
Because of the expected turnout, I had to cook a lot. And I had to do it without assistance. Not that the cooks were opposed to helping me. I was opposed, because I wanted them to have the day off, as well as get a chance to share the food. I didn't mind. I'd never taken on the job of cooking for a lot of people, so it was a fun, new experience. I did pretty well, if I must say so, finishing up on time. Nanabi helpfully provided a little magic, placing a spell on the food that would keep it warm for hours. It was the only assistance I required.
I entered the dining room, a medium sized one(yes, I only just found out there were more than two!), to see everyone waiting for me. I took a seat. Alice decided to say a few words.
"As you all know," the Monster Lord began. "Our marriage has been…. Challenging lately. I never realy thought of us as a family, but given that you've all had a lot to say about the situation, maybe that's what we are. As with any family, we have our problems and our conflicts, but we all love each other and want what's best for each other. Sometimes, we…. Meaning I, show poor judgment in that regard."
Someone at the table mumbled, "Mmm hmm." Had to be Tamamo, but I couldn't tell for sure.
"As all of you are also aware, Luka comes from another world," Alice continued. "What we are doing today is a tradition from his world, specifically a tradition from his country on that world. Every year, families get together to celebrate family and talk about what they are thankful for. That tradition is called 'Thanksgiving'. With that in mind, before we eat, I just wanted to go around the table and give everyone a chance to say what they are thankful for. I'll start: First and foremost, I'm thankful for my husband. Luka, even though you're an idiot, your heart always seems to lead you to the right destination, even while my superior brain leads me directly into a brick wall of stupidity. I'm thankful that you are the most forgiving man I've ever met, because even though your tendency to forgive virtually anyone irritates me to no end, I need that forgiveness more than most."
"You got that right," said another voice. Definitely not Tamamo. Who said that?
"And I'm thankful for my Heavenly Knights," Alice said pointedly. "Who tell me directly when I'm wrong, and yet LOVE me even when I get it wrong anyway."
Alice paused to give the peanut gallery a chance to say something, but silence reigned.
"I'm thankful for my lovely children," she went on. "Who make me so proud every day. I wish that I could spend more time with you than I do. Which brings me to Granberia and Tamamo, who I'm thankful towards for doing such a great job of helping me to raise my children. Nero and Neris could not have better mentors. Finally, I'm thankful for everyone here that I didn't mention, as well as everyone who resides in this castle. You stuck by me when you had to choose who to be loyal to when the Dark God returned ten years ago. I'll never forget that. Because of you, the world is at peace and monsters and humans alike are free. No Monster Lord can succeed without her cute little subordinates."
Alice gestured to Nero, who looked confused. "Nero, tell everyone what you're thank for," Alice prompted.
"Um…. " Nero thought for a minute. "I'm thankful for my mom and dad, and for Granberia and Tamamo, and for all the cool toys dad brings home from his world."
That got some chuckles. Neris didn't have to be prompted.
"I'm thankful for my parents," she said. "and all the monsters who teach us neat stuff and let us play all we want and give us candy."
"Alma Elma, your turn," Alice said.
"Oh, I don't know about all this," the succubus said flippantly. "I guess I'm thankful that Luka is so delicious and that he didn't make potatoes for this meal."
The children giggled. I decided not to scold Alma Elma for referencing inappropriate things around my kids, given that Alice didn't care about that sort of thing. They were half monster. She had no intention of shielding them from what she considered perfectly natural, although they were forbidden from engaging in relations with anyone themselves until they were old enough. I thanked all the deities that I knew existed that they didn't need semen for sustenance. Especially since Neris was growing up to look vaguely succubus-like.
Alice normally would have scolded Alma Elma for not being serious, or impatiently moved on, dismissing her. Instead, Alice seemed to sense that Alma Elma wanted to say more but was nervous.
"Alma Elma, we talked about this yesterday," Alice soothed. "Don't be afraid to express your feelings here. You're among family."
"I…." Alma Elma struggled. "I really am thankful for Luka. Not because he's delicious, but because he saved my life. I was destined to die in battle and instead I'm here now. I don't talk about it, but I think about it all the time. But what good is life if you don't live it well? I thought I lived it well at one time. I lived as a succubus, draining men, mainly men who were terrible to women. But Luka showed me that there are nice guys in the world. I've even found out, only recently, that there are men who want to get to know me for me, rather than just play with me. Knowing that, it's made me reassess my entire outlook on life. Maybe…. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to be…. Monogamous."
"I am so glad I'm not eating yet, because I might have choked just then," Tamamo giggled.
"Oh, be quiet!" Alma Elma said affectionately. "I'm also thankful that I got a chance to be who I really am. I love fighting. I had to hide my love for violent combat because of how I was born. Now I'm a damned good succubus, probably the best ever, but that was never who I wanted to be. I have to thank Granberia for that above all others. Granberia, you inspired me to be the best at what I really wanted to be."
"You are not the best," Granberia replied curtly. "I am the best."
"Unarmed?" Alma Elma chortled. "I think not."
"Is that a challenge?"
"Granberia, how about you go next?" Alice prompted, cutting them off.
"I am thankful first and foremost for Salamander," Granberia said. "Who made me the warrior I am today. I am also thankful to the Monster Lord, for showing me my limitations."
"You're also thankful that you aren't the Monster Lord," Alma Elma taunted.
"That too," Granberia chuckled. "I'm thankful that Luka defeated me in Iliasburg and again here in this castle, which forced me to listen to his wise words of coexistence."
"Are you thankful for anything that you actually won?" Tamamo asked.
"I am," Granberia replied. "I am thankful that I won at least a piece of Luka's heart. By all rights, he should have hated me or feared me. But he indulged my desires. I am thankful for his friendship. I am also thankful to Alipheese, for allowing our friendship to blossom, despite her desire to keep him all for herself."
"I'm the Monster Lord," Alice interjected. "My selfish wishes have to be subordinated to the greater good. Jealousy would have torn us all apart if I'd allowed it to."
"I guess I should go next, then," Tamamo said sheepishly. "I'm also thankful, for Luka, but especially to you, Alice. No matter what mistakes you've made, you've always acted in the interests of your subjects, willing to sacrifice all that was dear to you to for their sakes.. Your own life, even the life of your husband. I criticize you all the time, but the fact is that I've never been fit to sit on your throne. I let my heart rule me. I can't put aside my needs for the needs of monsters everywhere. You're stronger than me, Alice, and although I hate where that leads you to at times, I can't think of anyone else who deserves to sit on that throne more than you."
"Thank you, Tamamo," Alice said, smiling. "Without your guidance, I wouldn't be who I am today. I need your heart to do my job, Tamamo. I need to listen to you more than I do. You've been right about nearly everything. Please don't stop telling me when you think I'm wrong."
"I am thankful for coexistence," Erubetie said, assuming correctly that she was next. "I grew up loving humanity. Then I grew to hate them. Thanks to the efforts of Luka and Alice, our living conditions are improving every day. The humans now care about us, and even willingly feed us. The world is a much better place than it was ten years ago. And although I don't speak of it often, I am thankful that you are all my friends. My family. I hope soon to spend more time here with you all."
"Nanabi?" Alice prompted.
"I'm thankful for Tamamo, who honored me by selecting me as her aide, even though I was an underachiever. I never worked very hard on the combat arts, or magic. Technology and science were my first loves, and yet Tamamo saw the value in my work. I'm thankful for Luka, who is the best boss ever, next to Tamamo."
"I couldn't agree more," Promestein piped in, the last person at the table. "I know you all still don't like me very much. Alice already mentioned Luka's capacity for forgiveness, and no one at this table has needed it more than me. I didn't even want to come to this dinner, but Luka talked me into it. He talked me into it because I don't ever want to let him down again."
"Can we eat now?" Nero asked impatiently.
"Yep!" I said, going back into the kitchen to go get the food. Promestein rose to assist me. I tried to wave her off, but she insisted.
Everyone agreed that dinner was amazing. Even my friends who were light eaters gorged themselves. Alice, of course, ate almost as much as all of the others combined. I had rarely been more happy. Between this gathering and whatever Ilias had done to me, I felt that I was finally going to get my happily ever after. There were no threats in my immediate future, and the traumas of the past had somehow seemed to lose their power over me. I silently thanked the former goddess.
"Did someone call my name?"
Everyone turned at the sound of the goddess' voice.
"Luka!" Ilias exclaimed. "Why wasn't I invited? Is that any way to treat your goddess?"
"Have a seat," I said genially. "All are welcome today."
Everyone else reluctantly expressed agreement. Ilias created a chair out of nothing, seating herself next to me, and helped herself to some pumpkin pie, smothering it in an entire tub of Cool Whip.
"Luka, should we expect any more unexpected guests to drop in?" Alice asked pointedly.
"Any second now," Ilias replied instead.
Six forms materialized in the dining hall. Alipheese and the Ancestors! Alipheese materialized six chairs, which resulted in everyone moving closer together. The table was now at capacity. I found myself having to avoid elbowing Ilias as I ate. She showed no such concern for me, even using my shirt as a napkin when she couldn't find one of her own.
Alipheese sat on the other side of me, the Ancestors seating themselves near Heavenly Knights. Minagi next to Alma Elma, Kanade next to Erubetie, Saja next to Granberia, and Kanon and Hiruko bookended Tamamo.
"Did you bake any cookies, kid?" Alipheese asked. I nodded and asked Promestein to bring out the cookies. When Promestein returned with them, Alipheese eagerly dug in. "Mmmmm… even better than mall cookies! Your reputation is well earned!"
"So do any of our guests want to tell us what they are thankful for?" Alice asked.
"Sure," Alipheese said in between bites of cookies. "I'm thankful that there's now three gods in this world instead of two. Ilias and I would have been at each others' throats for eternity, with monsters and humans paying the price, if not for Luka's entry into this world."
"You're welcome," Ilias said pointedly.
"Whatever," Alipheese retorted. "As for you, Ilias, thanks for giving me memories of the alternate timeline. It really put things in perspective."
"You remember now?" I asked. "Ilias, was that the favor you were talking about?"
"Mmmm hmmmm…" Ilias responded, her mouth stuffed with pie, whipped cream all over her face.
"Not that I planned on making trouble for you anyway," Alipheese added. "You proved your strength already. Twice. I wasn't about to mess with you again. But seeing how things turned out the first time really drove home how stupid I was. Me and the girls, we like this new world."
"We are still not convinced it will last," Hiruko said, a tentacle reaching for a muffin. "But we see the worthiness of the endeavour now."
"From this day forward," Saja stated. "We shall be your allies, aiding you in defeating whatever threatens the peace of this world."
"And most importantly," Kanon added. "We pledge to fight for your ideals even after you are gone."
"So I guess that means we're all friends now?" I asked.
"Nope." "Uh uh." "No way in hell." Came a chorus from around the table.
"Well, at least we all agree on coexistence now?" I asked, waiting expectantly to hear objections. I heard none.
For the next twenty minutes, everyone continued to eat and converse. I was full, so I took some time to take it all in. Ilias, Alipheese, the Knights, Promestein, Alice, myself…. All sitting around the same table, breaking bread with one another. This hadn't been my primary mission when I started out on a journey so many years ago with Alice. It had been a secondary goal, something to try to work towards if I could find answers to the questions I had about the way this world worked. And yet at some point, I had forgotten what I really set out on a journey for and this had become my mission. In the end, I got everything that I wanted, and a wife and new friends to boot.
"Ilias?" I asked, turning towards the goddess. "What exactly did you do to me in that forest? Was that a kind of… sex?"
"What?! No!" Ilias exclaimed, food falling out of her mouth and onto the table. "I was purifying you. My true form is sexless. Since you were brave enough to want to see it, I decided to use it to make you whole again. You've been through a lot and I was the cause of most of it. It just seemed right to use what power I had to help you come to terms with it. By becoming one with me for a moment, I gave you perspective. You could say that I healed your soul."
"Thank you, Ilias," I said gratefully. "Are you sure you still don't like me?"
"I like your pumpkin pie."
I was beginning to feel a food coma coming on. I decided that it was time for the last announcement. I gave Alice the signal. She acknowledged me and turned to the children.
"Nero, Neris, it's bedtime," Alice said. "Go to your rooms."
The kids surprisingly didn't argue. They were half asleep anyway from all the food.
"Everyone!" Alice announced. "Luka has something to say!"
Everyone looked at me expectantly. Fortunately, this wasn't going to be difficult. All I had to do was speak from my heart, as well as break some bad news to some people at the table.
"I never got a chance to say what I was thankful for," I began. "Well, it should be pretty obvious. Seeing everyone here, all eating together, I don't think anyone could have imagined this. I'm also thankful for all of my loved ones and friends. I never felt wanted or needed in my past life. You've all made me feel like I matter, and every day you reinforce that with your love and friendship. Thank you all, from the bottom of my heart, for everything. I even want to thank you all for the bad things you did to me, because those bad things also contributed to where we are today. We all make mistakes. We all give in to our darker natures from time to time, even me. What matters is learning and growing, and I think everyone in this room has come a long way in that regard."
"Hear hear!" Alipheese exclaimed. "Even us immortals can learn and grow!"
"With that in mind," I continued. "I want to announce that I'm going to be exclusively with Alice from onw on. Alice allowed me to… er… play with many of you because she saw it as necessary to insure that we all were comfortable with one another and that there would be as little jealousy as possible among us. But what I didn't admit to Alice or myself was that I liked basically having a harem. That's my dark side. I am in fact a little perverted."
"Don't blame yourself, Luka," Alma Elma said. "We made you that way."
"Nevertheless," I said. "What Alice and I have is a marriage of human and monster. We will always have to compromise between human and monster traditions and morality, as well as between our needs as a couple and our duties as Monster Lord and Hero. But I think there's been enough passing me around. I want to be Alice's and Alice's alone. Most of you have shown me, rather intimately, how you feel about me. I appreciate that very much. I've had some… amazing experiences. So I hope that there aren't any hard feelings, or doubts about how I feel about all of you. I think this is just what's best for my marriage."
To my surprise, there were no objections, no sign that anyone was upset. Alice rose to speak.
"I love Luka for making that promise to me," Alice said. "It was one of the first things that I loved about him, his willingness to make such a promise to me even though I didn't deserve it at the time. The fact that I knew his heart is one reason I was able to get over my ingrained lamia jealousy. I want you to know, Granberia, that you can still spar with him, wrestle with him, even get grabby if you want, just… try not to cross the line, okay? Same with you Alma Elma, although I suspect I'll regret giving you an inch given your usual behavior. And Tamamo, you can cuddle with Luka with those tails of yours anytime you want. We're all family. Even though you can't have sex with Luka anymore, I want to encourage you to remain close. We shouldn't be afraid to touch one another in loving, positive ways, short of sex."
Everyone nodded their agreement. The Knights actually appeared to be happy for us. I was surprised and touched.
"However…." Alice added. What? "That all starts tomorrow. Tonight…."
Alice grabbed an apple, stuffing it in my mouth. She lifted me up and placed me on the table. We hadn't talked about this!
"Tonight, it's an all you can eat buffet! Enjoy!"
"Alice!" I exclaimed as she turned to leave.
"Have fun, darling! Make sure you get your fill! Oh, Cindy's going to be waiting for you when you're all done. Make sure to be good and clean before coming to bed!"
Alice left the room. I was still lying on the table, looking around. Many hungry faces, albeit beautiful faces, stared back at me. Tension seemed to hang in the air, as if no one could decide what to do. Tamamo broke the tension by jumping onto the table.
"Free for all!" she shouted, which prompted everyone to start pulling and grabbing at me. My clothes came off, torn to shreds in seconds as over a dozen pairs of hands roamed my body. Soon those hands would be joined by breasts, tongues, tentacles, and tails. Everyone was going to try to get their fill one last time.
"AAALLLIIICCEEEEEE!"