Chapter 49 - Epilogue 1

So there you have it. That's what really happened. Alice and I were married, the world was mostly at peace, and a new era had begun. It's been a year since I married Alice. I don't really do much heroiing. The only real threat out there are a few monsters that didn't get the memo, but humans and monsters alike have united to deal with those recalcitrants.

Once the kitsunes figured out how to travel between worlds, it wasn't long before they were able to duplicate Promestein's feat of making it more routine. It wasn't very hard for monsters to visit Earth. It was significantly harder for humans from Earth to visit the other world. That required the, er… ritual. . Anyway, Alice liked that just fine, since Earth is so much more populous and has dangerous technology. The last thing she wants are massive numbers of humans coming here. So for the time being, tourism is only one way. Even there, she only trusts Granberia and Tamamo. We do have plans to expand the circle of monsters and humans trusted to visit, so they should be coming to a gaming convention near you soon.

Not surprisingly, our first visit to Earth was for our honeymoon. I took her to Orlando. The food was a highlight. She was extremely impressed by the variety at even one restaurant, and tried to order most of the menu. In the end, she had to settle for a mere five entrees. Of course, she was in her human form. Can't go alarming the natives. When she tasted the food, she thought she'd gone to heaven. Whether it was fast food or the finest restaurants, she was into it.

Orlando being the home of amusement parks, I took her to those as well. It was one of my favorite things to do, after all. She loved the rides and marveled at the technology used to create them. It seemed like she stopped every two minutes to ask me what something was. She seemed to love my world, which made me very happy. Even the poor quality concessions available didn't dim her love of eating. There wasn't a concession stand we didn't stop to buy something from, especially where sweets were involved. Dippin Dots, slushies, Italian ices, ice cream, candy, cookies, soda…. She loved it all.

I introduced her to movies. She liked almost all of those as well. I was surprised that she especially enjoyed horror. She screamed like a maniac during those films, but that just made her seem to like them all the more.

On our second trip a few months later, we brought Granberia and Tamamo. I had never seen either of them in human form. Granberia could almost pass already, she just had to change her scales into skin and adjust her ears while eliminating the tail. Tamamo simply did the same, except with her fur. Hiding the fluffy tails hurt her heart, though. The rides more than made up for it. She was thrilled. Granberia liked some of it, didn't care for most of it. Granberia wasn't much of a foodie either. I would have assumed someone who worked out like she did would eat like a horse, but she ate only small meals and avoided junk food.

Much as Promestein had done, we brought over tech and integrated a lot of it into the castle. This world already had electricity, it just wasn't widely in use, but I changed all that, setting the kitsunes on a project to get the castle power. We even managed to get an internet connection across universes, which is no mean feat. That enabled Alice and I to Netflix and chill many nights, while also providing other denizens and visitors of the castle with entertainment.

I enjoyed introducing Alice to the concept of recorded music. Many mornings she can be seen working out with an Ipod listening to Pat Benatar and singing at the top of her lungs. Singing is not among her many talents. My favorite music is heavy metal, which Alice has no use for, but Granberia loves, especially if the songs are about glory and battle.

Granberia, not surprisingly, also ended up being a big fan of mixed martial arts and football. More unexpectedly, she also loved professional wrestling. I wouldn't have thought that possible, given how much she knows about fighting and how unrealistic the things pro wrestlers do are. She patiently explained that the over the top nature was why it was so great. Every warrior dreams of being able to pull off big moves like you see on TV, but in a real fight the opponent has an annoying tendency to not cooperate, so most real fights just involve rolling around and rabbit punching each other until someone gets a choke.

This all meant that she insisted on practicing unarmed fighting with me. Alice always supervises these contests, because now that Granberia and I are close friends, she can get a little… playful. When she gets too grabby, our play is usually cut short by Alice ordering us out of the pool, so to speak. Alma Elma LOVES watching these events as well, so Granberia, Alma Elma, and I often end up in front of a TV watching together. Alice has told me in no uncertain terms that I will never, ever, ever be allowed to wrestle Alma Elma. I think I understand why.

We still have sword contests as well, Granberia and me. She enjoys this more than anything, even though she always beats me. We don't use elements or special moves, which means the battles can be quite lengthy. I've had to visit the healers quite a few times. They do good work. The only scar I decided to keep was the first one Granberia had ever given me. She was touched by that gesture.

Most days, I work on tech stuff with the kitsunes. Nanabi and I are very close on a professional basi. She was an amazingly quick study, which caused her to be appointed Top Sciency Person by Tamamo. That's the job title Tamamo gave her, don't get on my case. Tamamo spends most of her time in Yamatai, but she's no slouch in the brains department herself, so she often helps out with integrating new tech into the world. The goal is to electrify all human settlements within ten years.

We even managed to get a reasonably good environmental movement going. Many humans didn't care that the slimes' habitats had been ruined, but many did care, and volunteered their time to help with the cleanup. Erubetie was dumbfounded and moved that so many humans had come to assist. The slimes were all too happy to reward them properly. A good time was had by all.

Alma Elma still dominates the coliseum. I think I'm pretty close to talking Granberia into competing. Or not. For some reason she seems fine with the idea of going up against me, but insists that any contest with Alma Elma must not take place in front of an audience. I wonder what that's about?

As expected, the human slaves in the castle didn't want to leave. Nevertheless, slavery was abolished throughout the world and the humans who had previously been captives, albeit willing captives, were free to come and go as they pleased and no longer forced to do labor. No new captives would ever be brought to the castle again.

Alice and I don't spend all that much time together. She's very busy as the Monster Lord, and I'm very busy with my tech duties and ceremonial drudgery that occurs all over the world. Cut a ribbon on a new project in Grand Noah, then to an important wedding between a queen monster and a human, then on to help mediate a dispute between fairies and humans over logging. The job is a lot more intimidating than I thought it would be. At least now, I end every night cuddled up with Alice, and I get to wake up next to her as well. She makes a point of staying in bed with me even though she always wakes up an hour or two before I do. We make sure to take vacations frequently to get quality time together.

Most of my time is spent with Granberia, practicing with swords, playing video games(she loves fighting games, naturally, as does Alma Elma), watching TV, or going on special missions where violence is a possibility. Granberia seems very satisfied with everything, which I'm pretty happy about. She really did want to spend time with me and didn't need to have me all to herself to be happy. I actually spend more time with her than I do with my own wife. She's become my best friend and I love her dearly.

Eden hasn't shown her face since our wedding day. In general, she seems to favor a light touch. Her only commandments have been to love one another and use violence only in self defense. Already she has more followers than Ilias did when I first arrived here. The practice of baptism has been ended, since relations between monsters and humans are not only allowed, but encouraged. Heroes become heroes now because of what they do, not because they had a ceremony. Although there aren't many dangers to fight, young men and women all over the world have expressed a desire to be a hero, following my example. It's not an easy thing for me to process, having been a nobody for so long.

I haven't heard anything about Promestein either. I guess she's decided to move on with her life and not cause anymore trouble. It looks like she's gotten away with everything. But if she ever makes troiuble on my world, I'm going to find her and deal with her.

Cindy is a frequent visitor to the castle and enjoys teasing me. She's the only person who can constantly flirt with me and Alice doesn't mind. If anything, she seems to take sadistic glee in encouraging Cindy. I've grown to really like her, though. She's a sweetheart and has adjusted well to a new world in which she can't just wash any man she comes across. It's not as if she is having any trouble finding willing men. That goes for all the sea creatures. The once empty beaches now look like spring break at Daytona Beach. The monsters of the sea aren't like to ever have to worry about semen deprivation again.

Chrome has given up necromancy in favor of… dollmaking. I don't think she wanted to give up necromancy, but Alice made it clear that dollmaking was the only family trade that she approved of, so that's what Chrome was left with. Chrome still practices necromancy in one way, however. I set up computers in her lab, which she now uses to design horror video games as a hobby. If she can't have real ghosts and zombies, she'll create virtual ones and scare two worlds with them.

Alice and I don't have any children yet. Tamamo was quite disappointed, since the consummation ceremony is supposed to be extremely reliable at producing them. She speculates that my unique genetics might make conception more challenging. Yamatai Village had a pretty low birth rate between monsters and the humans there. She has encouraged us to keep on trying. There must be an heir. If that's not possible for whatever reason, Alice and I have already discussed alternatives.

So you're probably wondering if I'll have any other stories to tell. I guess I could write about that one mission with Granberia if you really want to read about it. Or perhaps I'll wait for another cataclysmic world event to occur where the great hero and the Monster Lord and the Four Heavenly Knights spring into action to once again save the universe. Hopefully that never happens. I don't consider my life to be boring at all. Quite the opposite, in fact. I live in a castle surrounded by beautiful monster girls who all think I'm wonderful, I get to spend most of my work day doing a job I love with beautiful and intelligent foxes, and everywhere I go people want to give me a medal or the key to the city. I've brought nearly all the modern conveniences I loved in my previous life into my new life. It's more than I ever could have dreamed of, and the best part is, I don't need nearly as much therapy as I thought I would!

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