Gwendolyn stood there, at the edge of the cliff, watching Thor walk away, and feeling more torn apart by anguish than she ever had. First her father; now Thor. It was a day unlike any she had ever had. She could not even describe the unfathomable grief that tore her part at the thought of her father being dead. Dead by some assassin's hand, taken away from her without even a moment's notice. It just wasn't fair. He was the light of her life, and some stranger had taken him away from her for good.
When Gwen had discovered the news, she had wanted to die herself. Last night had been like one long nightmare, and this morning, like the peak of it. As his body went into the earth, she had wanted to leap in with him, and never come out.
When Gwen burst from the crowd, she had even been thinking about jumping over the edge of the cliff herself. Until Thor arrived.
Seeing him, in some strange way, snapped her out of it, had made things better, had taken her mind off her father - although in another way, it had also made things far worse. She was still furious with him, still burned with anger for his making a fool of her in that brothel. She had taken a chance by being with a commoner, and he had proved everyone right about her recklessness. Including her mother. She felt shamed beyond what she could imagine.
And now the gall of him, to show up here, to try to make things right, while he himself admitted that he had been there, with that woman. The thought of it was enough to make her sick.
As she watched Thor hurry off, down the trail, away from the cliff, Krohn beside him, despite herself she felt a sense of longing, of despair; she wondered how things could get any worse. She looked out over the endless expanse, over the dips and valleys of the Kolvian Cliffs, looking westward over the kingdom. She knew that somewhere, farther than she could see, lay the Highlands, and beyond that the McCloud's kingdom. She wondered if her sister was already over there, with her new husband, if she were enjoying her life. She was lucky to be far from here.
But then again, her sister had never been that close with their father, and she wondered if she would even care if she heard news of his demise. She, Gwen, of all of them, had been the closest to him. Reese and Kendrick had been close, too, and she could see how hard it hit them. Godfrey had hated their father, though now, looking at him, she was surprised to see his upset, too. And then there was Gareth. He still looked as cold and emotionless as ever, even with their father's death. He had looked preoccupied. As if his eyes were already on the power he so desperately wanted to seize.
The thought of it made her shudder. She remembered her father's fateful speech, his assigning the rule of the kingdom to her for some far-off day, for a day she was sure she would never see. She remembered her vow to him, her promise that she would rule. And now, here she was, the kingdom plopped into her hand. Would they make her rule? She hoped not. How could she? And yet, she had vowed to her father that she would. What was to become of her?
"There you are," came a voice.
Gwen turned to see Reese, standing a few feet away, looking at her with concern.
"I was worried for you. "
"What did you think, I was going to jump?" she snapped back at him, too harsh. She didn't mean for it to come out that way, but she was reeling, barely able to control herself.
"No, of course not," Reese said. "I was just worried about you, that's all. "
"Don't worry about me," she said. "I am your older sister. I can take care of myself. "
"I never said you couldn't," Reese said, defensive. "I just want you know. . . you're not the only one who's suffering. I loved father, too. "
Gwen thought about that. She saw the tears in his eyes and knew that he was right; she was being selfish. Their father's death was hurting them all.
"I am sorry," she said softly. "I know you did. And I know he loved you, too. Very much. In fact, I think he saw himself most in you. "
Reese looked up at her with a hopeful, sad look. He looked so lost, her heart broke for him. Who would raise him now? she wondered. He was fourteen, not a boy, but hardly a man. This was the time a boy needed his father the most, needed a man to model after. Since the news of his death, her mother had been nearly catatonic, withdrawn, not present for any of them. Her older sister was gone; Gareth was never present; Godfrey lived in the alehouse; and Kendrick lived on the battlefield. Gwen felt that it fell on her to be Reese's mother and father.
"You are going to be fine," she said, gaining courage herself as she said it. "We are all going to be fine. "
"Did I see Thor come this way?" Reese asked.
The thought of it made Gwen's stomach turn.
"He did," she answered flatly. "And I sent him on his way. "
"What do you mean?" Recessed asked warily. "I thought you two were close. "
She grunted.
"Not anymore. Not after what he did. "
"What did he do?" he asked, wide-eyed.
"As if to tell me you don't know? As if to tell me the whole kingdom does not know what a fool he has made of me?"
"A fool? What are you talking about?" Reese asked, sounding genuinely curious.
She studied him and could see he genuinely did not seem to know, which surprised her. She had imagined that the whole kingdom knew, and was making fun of her behind her back. Maybe it was not as bad as she had imagined; maybe it was not as bad as Alton had said.
"I heard all about his exploits at the brothel. His time with those women," she said.
Reese's face dropped.
"And who did you hear this from?"
Gwen paused, suddenly not so sure of herself.
"Why, Alton, of course. "
Reese grinned.
"And you believed it?"
Gwen stared back, feeling a flutter in her chest, beginning to wonder if she had made some sort of awful mistake.
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"I was there with him that day," Reese said. "In the brothel. We all were. The entire Legion. After the hunt. He did nothing wrong. It was more tavern than brothel. In fact, I was by his side when the women came out. He had been surprised to discover there were any women there at all. He had, in fact, tried to flee. The men shoved him forward. He did not go forward willingly. "
"But still, he went forward," Gwen said accusingly.
Reese shook his head adamantly.
"You have been misinformed. Thor did nothing. He reached the landing and passed out. He hit the floor before a woman could lay a hand on him. He did not touch any woman, I assure you. Alton was lying to you. It was Alton that made a fool of you. Your pride remains intact. "
Gwen felt her whole body flush at his words. She felt overwhelmed with relief, but also with shame. She had been wrong about Thor. She thought of her harsh words to him. She had never meant to call him a commoner; she had not known why she'd said that. She sounded so haughty, so arrogant; she was disgusted with herself. How could she have been so cruel?
"What did you say to him exactly?" Reese asked.
Gwen lowered her chin.
"Something stupid. Very, very stupid. Something I did not mean. "
Gwen felt overwhelmed; she reached in and gave Reese a hug, and he hugged her back. She cried over his shoulder.
"I miss our father," she said.
"I know," Reese said over her shoulder, his words muffled. "I miss him, too. "
Reese pulled back and looked at her.
"I will talk to Thor. Whatever you said, I will try to smooth it over. "
Gwen slowly shook her head, unsure.
"Some things cannot be taken back," she said softly.