Autumn. Here, it feels like a turn of a century. Leaves turn orange to match my hair. The air becomes brisk. There is something about October that I cannot quite explain. The sunlight has a different hue, like someone dragged the vibrance slider in a photo editor app. My parents named me Aki, which is probably why I have such an affiliation with this season. Nothing quite feels like it.
Classes in the autumn really do start ramping up. It is my second year at this high school. People have found their places by now, whether it be in a club, sports or some other extra curricular. I however, never found my place. Every day I think about doing something I want. I have always wanted to join the archery club, but I could never quite take the first step. The truth is, I am afraid. There are two things in this world that are my utmost fears. One of them is trying something new, and the other is inconveniencing people. Being a part of a team has its benefits, but if you're like me, it has a major drawback. Envision this scenario. You are up to bat in that last inning of a baseball match, and it's a tie game. The team is depending on you to hit the ball successfully to get one more run in order to win. The pressure must be so immense. Succeeding must feel amazing, like you are on top of the world. However, what if you miss? What if you fail? The team would be disappointed and you would be a hindrance. You might lose the opportunity to play. That is one of the main reasons why I have been so hesitant on doing something. I can't quite climb that hedge.