Chereads / A Fish Out of Water / Chapter 49 - Rakian invasion

Chapter 49 - Rakian invasion

I was happily burning my way through the nineteenth floor. Killing everything in sight and hidden in the bush. I was also burning all the herb and plant resources, but that wasn't my main concern.

The satisfaction from seeing my fears burn away, was cathartic.

I was having fun, until, someone complained. Probably some cunt from the Dian Chet familia. Not really my problem. Several hours into my pyrotherapy, Asfi came to collect me, by order of the Guild.

*A few hours later*

Here I am. In the underground throne room of Ouranos. 

"...and so I request you to use your considerable talents and technology to scout the Rakian forces, and if possible harass them, and deter them from this foolish endeavor."

The words coming from Ouranos weren't his, but those of Freya and possibly Loki. Hermes was contacted, then Ouranos, and now I'm stuck with the shit scouting job. 

The stupid dungeon is also getting on my nerves. The jungle floors are giving me anxiety and nightmares. Waking up to you friends throat slit open, is not a memory one wants to re-live. Even in nightmare form.

I sent my droids down there and burned the whole place to the ground. Green dragons, jewel trees and all. Now I just have to wait until they respawn. Which they will in six to eight months. Yes months. That is if I don't burn down everything in sight again. The normal shits are pretty easy to deal with. It's just that I want a few jewel trees and a few pet dragons.

Who doesn't want to be a dragon rider?

But all that can wait. Right now, I have to reinforce the security around my base, and head out.

I will obviously use the jet bike. Did they think I would WALK?

*First Scouting*

I really didn't think they would mobilize such a large percentage of their forces. The dust clouds in the horizon and my previous scouting reports state at least 50,000 fighting-fit soldiers and 20,000 auxiliaries.

What the actual fuck!

Do they want to me to make a Philosopher's Stone?

Honestly I'm not to sure about how to do it, but I guess it's can't be that hard. Also, I will be keeping the souls chained to the mortal world, so the downside is, more magical fuckery.

Fuck that noise! I'm buying an item that best helps with my current requirements.

Blow up a few areas, steamroll the poor sods who are misled by an imbecile. Kill Ares. That should be enough to get them to retreat. Yes, Ares in his minuscule wisdom, had come with the invading forces. He's literally biting the hand that fed him. If Ouranos wants, he can just banish Ares and be done with all this hullabaloo.

But Ouranos despite his annoyance has to be impartial. So as his attack dog, I have to sort out the mess.

I might just take Rakia as my testing grounds. I mean I have live subjects, and pre-made targets. Will I be a tyrant? Yes. Do I care? No.

Using the orb thing Fels gave me I made a formal report.

[Scouting Action Report

Enemy Sighted.

7-12 days march away.

Observed, 10 large groups moving with accompanying auxiliaries.

Estimated 50,000 fighting fit soldiers. With another estimated 20,000 auxiliaries.

Ares marches with his forces.

End Report]

After which I flew back to Orario.

The whole thing took me two hours. Which had the entire "council" shitting themselves, at the implications.

1. I can be anywhere I want to be.

2. I have better tech. Magic. Or Both.

3. Regardless of level, actual or perceived, I am not to be fucked with.

I really enjoyed the last one. The red-head tomboy actually shut up for more than five minutes. Super-Hoe was scheming something, which I will have to put to rest. Publicly. Some of the smaller familias' gods and captains were simply impressed, these fuckers are going to be my cannon fodder.

*****

Another day another dollar.

Or in this case vali.

I have been tasked with scouting the invading forces daily. It's not like I don't see what these morons are planning behind my back. Do I know what they're planning? No. Do I care? No. Have I made several satellites to rain down tungsten rods on Orario at a mental command? Yes.

In fact, I don't know why I didn't come up with the satellite plan sooner. I made a few observational satellites and set them to do their thing.

Now I just chill while Cipher goes hunting, and send a report every few hours.

I even sent a report on their food reserves! The morons think I snuck in, I used some of the things Madara taught me and made a shadow bug. It was in the kitchen when I overheard a conversation about the supplies lasting a few weeks.

This told me a few things:

There might be some big shots who could go toe-to-toe with Orarios' top adventurers.

They plan to lay siege.

They have an overcrowding problem, this is an efficient way for them to cull their population.

I obviously took a closer look around their encampment, whenever they stopped to rest. I had names and pictures of most of their top brass.

Ares looks like a cunt. You know those people you know are only alive because their mothers didn't swallow, but she'd swallow shit if it meant something like that won't come out of her cunt again? He's one of them.

Fuck this, I'm going to Orario to set up my kill box.