From that day I could not get him out of my head.
He's not a girl.
My thoughts still were jumbled, and my disbelief was overcrowding my logic.
Sigh
I ruffled my hair and grit my teeth. Uuuuugh
I can't believe I was in love with her for so many years, feeling guilty of breaking my promise, just to come to the point of her being a… him.
Waaaaaaa!!!!
I straightened up so that I could carry on to school before the late bell.
Hiro: Hey Sai!
I whirled around and almost knocked into a kid carrying books.
Huuuuuuh!! Wha… what is he doing here? Out of all the schools…
Hiro: Be careful. Are you okay?
Sai: Hey Hiro…
Hehe
Sai: Yeah, I'm okay.
I let out a nervous chuckle trying to smooth over this awkward moment.
Sigh
Could this day get any harder?
Well… I probably shouldn't have asked.
I walked on to put my things in my hub and found my seat and there it is.
We both wound up being in the same classroom and our desks were assigned close by as well.
Hiro: Oh look, we are seated together.
His smile was genuine, and he was purely happy. I had to look away… I was getting lost in his eyes once again.
Hiro! Hey… Hiro!
I snapped out of my gaze and turned to see a tall dark-haired boy calling out.
Who is this guy?
Hiro: Oh… Hey Itachi. Looks like we are together again, huh? Hehe
Who is he?
Itachi: No, Sorry kiddo. I'm in class 1-C. As much as I would love to be in 1-A with you, it just isn't happenin' this year.
He smiled too sincerely at Hiro and ruffles his hair. I felt another tug at my chest.
Kiddo?... Who is he calling, Kiddo?! Sigh
I sat at my seat with a slight agitation trying not to add more confusion to my already confused situation.
…I don't like it.
In the back of my mind, as I stare out the window, waiting for class to settle in, the thoughts kept creeping into my mind.
Hiro: Hehehe… You are so silly Itachi.
His voice caused an ache in my chest. I looked over to see the guy Itachi, rustling Hiro's hair.
…I don't like it.
I was about to get up when the teacher walked in, and that Itachi guy was on his way out.
Sigh
This is driving me crazy.
Attention!
The class sat up straight in their chairs and silence filled the room.
I looked over at Hiro as the teacher began taking the role.
…He's mine… I don't like it.
I felt the buildup in my chest and the suffocation of my thoughts, until… he looked at me.
Drip
And like a droplet in a pond, my mind and body became calm.
He had a certain light about himself. I found myself watching him throughout the day as if he were a bird fluttering in the sunlight.
Pretty…
By the time I realized the lunch bell had chimed, I grabbed my bag, rushing out the door.
What is wrong with me?
I ran up the stairs and headed to the rooftop, bust through the doors, and bent over to steady myself on my knees.
What is wrong with me??
I could not figure out why I couldn't let this go. He was not a girl. He was not who I thought he was. He…
But you love him…
The voice spoke in my mind with conviction. I could not deny that there was something about Hiro that was unshakeable.
Don't fight it… Don't run…
I gripped my chest and gasped for air, as the wind caressed my face like a cool cloth.
Ting
Like a soft chime that went off, I looked up to see Hiro sitting on the roof bench, staring at me with a blank expression.
Go to him…
I stood up and fixed my clothes, picked up my bag, and walked to the opposite side of the bench to sit down.
Hiro: Hey Sai… Are you okay? You don't look too good.
I looked over to see his eyes quivering with concern.
Damn.
I found myself once again getting lost in him.
Sigh
Sai: I'm okay Hiro. Just a little hungry, I guess. Hehe
I tried to laugh it off but the uneasy feeling in my chest wanted to grab Hiro into my embrace and ravish him.
Just a small kiss… Just a-
Hiro: So how do you like the class? Fun right??
I couldn't stop the thoughts in my mind from distracting me, and I found myself stumbling over words.
Sai: Yeah… I like it. So pretty.
Hiro: So pretty?
I caught him looking at me with a confused expression, and at that moment I realized what words came out of my mouth.
Sai: Uh… yeah… uh. The sky is so pretty today. I… uh… found myself looking at it from the window. It's a beautiful view. Hehe
I felt the tug deeper in my chest and the pressure to hold back, just being so close to him. It began to sink in.
I was falling… falling hard.
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