Raymond felt hatred for himself as he watched her leave, both because he had touched her and because he had loved her, as well as for everything in between. Because he had never intended for her to be hurt, the act of injuring her was the thing that he loathed the most. It had been too much for him, and as a result, he had effectively drawn her closer to himself. He had promised himself that he would not even bring it and that he would not say or do anything that would let her know he was offended by what she had done.