"Home sweet home." Greta dumps her hand luggage in the center of the Tarry shack as I walk in behind her and gaze around the much-missed home of ours. Glad to be back here even though we were not gone all that long, not even far, and yet it feels like we went to another planet. That it's been months instead of one. It's the warmest and most relaxing breath of fresh air to walk in here, letting all my stresses go and basking in the feel of familiar safety.
We covered up everything with dust sheets down here since we didn't know how long we would be gone, and this area gets a lot of incoming sand and salty air from the air vents, and it looks oddly abandoned. Everything is covered in cream cloth. All the chairs are upside down on surfaces, creating a sea of beige mountains with weird ridges and peaks.
"Where do you want these?" Bryant shuffles behind us with suitcases in hand, and Greta lurches into action. Instantly smiley and attentive to our casually dressed muscle man. They have been flirting and cooing at one another all morning, especially on the boat ride home, and I am leaving her to it. I don't want to play the third wheel to whatever they have brewing.
"Follow me. They belong upstairs." She beams his way, all coy and sassy, and picks up her weekend bag again to lead him towards the kitchen and our upper floor apartment. Not that there's much room up there, but they will be alone finally, and maybe I won't see them for a while. I wouldn't put it past her to make some moves on him while that close to a bed, in minimal space.
"That boy is so gone. I smell future wedding bells." Jyeon mutters it behind my head and startles me with his sudden appearance. Making me flinch in fright, and I smack him on the arm for surprising me with an impulsive squeak.
"Don't sneak up on me."
"I wasn't sneaking. I was stealth entering so I could check your ass out before alerting you to my presence." He winks, smacks my butt in passing, and then stops in front of me to look around this familiar space. Leaving me blushing from his sexy attack and dazed at how easily he's slid into this touchy, lovey, husband-type person, who has become a thousand times more affectionate and attentive than the Jyeon I ever knew. I can't get used to him being this way and constantly questioning if I am dreaming or not.
"Well, you can stop checking out my ass and help me start taking off the dust sheets to clean this place up. It's a sandy island, and we need to get the dust and dirt under control from our absence." I nudge him in the butt with my palm, returning the favor seeing as he got to feel mine and hoping a task will help me adapt to him being here. His ass is a nice balance between toned and muscular and a little soft and grabbable. Way too alluring.
"There's one thing first." Jyeon turns to me with a wistful smile, cocking his head to the side. He appraises me as if sizing me up while pondering something, which fires up my suspicion.
"What?" I do not trust that glint in his eye. It's almost predator-like.
"Come with me." He bends towards me, making me squeal as I'm thrust over his shoulder, winding me, and lifted over the top of him in an ungraceful kidnap maneuver. I am practically thrown over him.
"JYEON!" I yell, flailing my arms and gripping him around his back as he turns us and heads for the stair at speed. Holding on for dear life and panicking, seeing as I have never been carried this way.
"What are you doing?" I smack his ass lightly to fight my way free, but he palms one of my butt cheeks to hold me in place, squeezing it, and I catch the chuckle under his breath. He tightens his other arm around my legs to keep me secure and bounces me on his shoulder as he takes the stairs. It's terrifying to be looking down while someone spans a pretty steep staircase with you held so precariously.
"I'm having a do-over moment."
"A what?" I yelp as he bounces my abdomen and smacks my ass again, seemingly unable not to when it's right by his face.
"You'll see."
Jyeon walks us to the second floor and heads for the central area of the seating, seemingly looking for the perfect spot, and stops at the far rear. He turns me in a half-circle as he looks around, checks the area, sidesteps a few paces, and finally deposits me back on my feet and places his hands on my shoulders while smiling at my face. I'm bolted upright so fast I get a little light-headed and sway, but he anchors me still.
"What is this?" I giggle at how weird he's being, amused by his cheerful expression. He looks so young and carefree since we left the city this morning, and his growing happiness is infectious. I had doubts about running away like this, but it already feels like a vacation and a new adventure, and I'm beyond happy he's with me. Jyeon seems like he needed the break.
I gaze around where we are, wondering what he's doing. Sort of off to the side of one of the larger dining tables in the clearing that serves as a walkway for people coming up and down. Not sure what's so great about this part of this entire area.
"This is where I first laid eyes on you again… and you told me your name was Anna." Jyeon steps in towards me to close the gap, tucking my hair behind my left hair and sobering as his expression turns serious. Jogging my memory of the day, I dropped the breadsticks, and I 'ahhh.' I hadn't forgotten. It's just that I was so caught in what I was doing that I didn't pay any attention to the exact whereabouts of this room at the time. I was too busy having a mild heart attack. I'll never forget that moment when everything came crashing down on top of me.
"So it is."
The way he locks onto my eyes makes my heart skip a beat and my stomach somersault. So serious and intense compared to the light-hearted fun of a few seconds ago. The mood gets heavier with the way he exhales and gazes at me as though he's about to burst into a love sonnet. I really cannot deny that the way he looks at me daily is loaded with infatuation that I found so hard to believe at first.
"I should have done this instead because I really wanted to. You have no idea how huge that second was to find you again finally. I was in shock, but it was the happiest day ever." Jyeon leans in and wraps me in his arms, tugging me in, hugging me into a full-body hold that buries my face against his shoulder and almost bends me in two with force. My face squished, and my ribs constricted, so I can't fully inhale, but the strength translates how badly he missed me. It carries so much meaning, and I don't know how I would have reacted if he had done this to me that day. Maybe I would have responded to him differently had his first reaction been a hug.
We stay that way for a moment, my arms snaking around him to return the love and closing my eyes to savor how amazing his touch always feels. Always at peace and content in his arms now. He draws back and cups my face with one hand, edging us slightly apart so we are semi-cuddling.
Jyeon lifts my chin, so my eyes flutter open, and sinks a passionate kiss on me, molding his lips to mine and pressing us tightly together. Kissing me with longing and need while teasing my lips open, we move to full French making out with exploring tongues and heavy breathing, losing ourselves in each other. Forgetting we are standing in the middle of the dining area. My body revving up in heat and hormones, and my pulse rate rises as every one of my nerve endings respond to him.
Jyeon pulls away first, leaving me breathless and dizzy from kissing me senseless, and rests his nose against mine so he can gaze deeply into my eyes once more. The air crackles between us. I am so responsive and fired up.
"I swear something was on my side that day, pushing me to you. At first, I couldn't believe my eyes, and yet the more I stared, the surer I was that it was you. It wasn't just your face; it was everything about you. No matter what you said, I knew you were my Sohla. I thought I was dreaming. You have no idea how many times I wished to be able to walk in somewhere, and there you'd be."
The memory tugs at my heart and my eyes glaze over as a choking ball of heaviness moves up my chest. I never thought things would turn out this way in a million years, and I regret how hostile we were to him back then.
"I was scared you were about to ruin everything I built here. I didn't know if you had moved on with her… had taken over OLO and if my being dead had been down to you. I was so afraid. I didn't know how to react." I slide my hand over his, which still cups my cheek, and reach out to touch his lips with my other hand—smoothing over his face, then neck and shoulder in a subtle affection. Basking in the way he's staring at me. I can't believe I ever doubted him and suspected he could physically hurt me.
"I'm sorry that you ever had those thoughts or felt that way... That I had hurt you to the point where you no longer had any faith or trust in me anymore. I hate that it took two years to find you. I hate that I lost all that time in winning you back, begging for forgiveness, yet…. I'm glad this place did something for you that I couldn't. That it gave you time to heal and find yourself again. That it gave me a second chance at us." He brushes his thumb over my cheek and then leans in and lightly kisses me again, this time a peck that sends goosebumps across my skin and flutters through my stomach.
"I think we all needed time apart to figure things out. To forget… to be able to forgive. Me leaving gave you headspace too…. About Tia, about us, about everything. You're not the same as you were. Neither is mother. Yoonah is finally growing up and thinking about sorting himself out for himself."
"Yeah, I guess. I was so caught in grief and blame, refusing to see where I failed….. I needed a wake-up call. I needed to lose you to realize I couldn't live without you." He exhales heavily in a sort of sigh. "Yoonie and I had a real heart to heart about everything, even that, and although we are far from okay, it was a start. Mother is getting old, and two years of emptiness and loneliness in that big house made her rethink her role as mother to you and us. She's tried so hard with Yoonah, grown closer, and learned that her kids are more than legacy carriers. I feel like she appreciates her family more than her wealth now. I think she realized she had a heart and did have the ability to love us. If I weren't the reason you were gone, she and I would have been on better terms too, but I guess it's something I can change now."
"I have to admit… the changes in you all… I didn't trust them at first. They seemed extreme and didn't match what I made myself believe while I was gone. I still find it weird to see mother like that now how she is. So much softer and warmer." I smile to myself, remembering the me of old and even though I still possess the abilities to wear her when I need her, I know I am more human now than I ever was. I guess, though, I could say the same about myself. "I am sure I have changed so drastically that you probably weren't sure about me either."
"You are the girl I used to know. That's what I saw. And it made it so much harder not to pick you up and wrap myself around you. The urge to protect you and take you home was insane. I didn't just find Sohla Park, my wife and estranged lover…. I found the girl she hid away and refused to be for fear of the world hurting her further. The girl who wrapped me around her finger as a kid and planted herself right in here." Jyeon pats his chest, moving back to separate us properly, and reaches inside his shirt.
I watch him as he fishes the chain around his neck and slides out his wedding ring before pulling it over his head and letting me go. He uses both hands to fumble with the silver metal and unlatches it so he can unthread it and take them apart.
"At first, I figured we should throw these away and start over…, but now, I feel like our history and promises we made as kids are all tied up in these too. I don't want the bad things to come back and haunt us, but I don't want to forget the good. We had a lot of nice memories, happy days, and a lot of years together." Jyeon takes his ring and slides it onto his finger on his left hand before dropping the chain into his shirt pocket and admiring his adornment with pride and a subtle smile.
I stare at it for a long time, with many thoughts and feelings about its symbolism. Not the ring itself, but the fact he kept it on him every day while I was gone and now wants to wear it again before we even know what will happen. My heart fills to the brim with a strange, heavy yet fluttering sensation, and my lip trembles as insta tears come out of nowhere. Blind sighting me.
"I couldn't ever throw mine away either, even when …" I can't even say the words.
When you broke my heart. When I thought you hated me and wanted me dead. When I thought you had moved on in your life with another woman, I stupidly clung to it, unable to put you out of my heart.
I held onto it because it was my link to him, and my heart couldn't forget, even if he hurt me.
"Maybe we both held onto them because we didn't want to let go of each other and knew that we would come back together again one day." Jyeon softly smiles and then reaches to my collar and slides gentle fingers under the edge to locate my necklace. He pulls it out slowly and then lets my ring dangle between us, glinting in the sun from the windows up here. I stare at it and then the hand holding it, sporting the matching half.
"Put it on me," I whisper in a hushed tone and catch the flicker of surprise in his expression. His twitching brow, the subtle dimple in his face as his jaw flexes. Jyeon leans in so he can move his hands behind my neck and unclip the chain for me. Not needing to be told twice.
"I love you." It's a soft, breathy declaration in my ear as he removes my chain and kisses my temple before sliding back to roll it off into his palm. He puts the chain in his pocket to live with his and runs his fingers over the smaller version of the one on his hand, admiring it. It seems so delicate in his fingers.
"Here." I lift my left hand to him so he can put it on, but Jyeon retracts his hands and clenches my ring in a fist to hide it away. Pulling it back out of reach.
"On second thoughts…" he grins at me, and I impulse slap him in the abdomen with a frown and dramatic glare, that I don't find him changing his mind funny.
"Hey.. feisty!" He laughs at my spark of anger. "I just meant we should make this more of a memorable event. Do it somewhere romantic, maybe some vows…."
"That's called a wedding, Jyeon. We did that already." I move to snatch at his hand, and he annoyingly lifts it above his head, not relenting one bit, putting it way beyond my capability of reach.
"Let's do that then." He raises a brow at me, and I gawp at him in disbelief.
"What? ….. We only just started this … now you want to get married? It's a little soon, and I only agreed to wear it, seeing as it's here and …" I don't even know. Jyeon has a way of rolling me up in his tumbleweed and dragging me along with him no matter how much I protest.
"We're already married. I mean, like a do-over, refresher kind of thing. This seems unsymbolic and not meaningful enough."
"They call that retaking your vows. You're overthinking this." I prod at his chest, clicking my fingers in impatience, and gesture for him to give me my ring. It's just a ring and a symbol of our commitment to one another that was promised forever ago. I don't care about any of that. I would just like to put it on my finger and get on with my day.
"So …. let's do it. Start over. Mean them this time." His voice hoarses out a little, bringing my full attention to his face and how serious he is being. It's not him being funny or playful, but an honest question.
He's not for giving it to me, yet he has an ultra-focused expression on, his gaze locked on my face in a way that completely breaks down all my defenses. He swallows hard, and then I click that this is his way of expressing something that would mean a lot to him. That he's putting importance on something this simple. For him, maybe retaking the vows and wearing these afresh allows him to put what he did to bed and is a sign I can move on and forget it. I think he needs it more than I do.
"I don't know. I don't want another wedding…. God, I can't even. Mother would torture me for the second time in my life. She was such a bridezilla type, and it wasn't even her big day." I shudder at the memories of our vast and public, overly opulent affair that made me feel like I was a display mannequin all day. Mother was the absolute worst about it being a perfect show.
"No, not like that. A beach thing, maybe the four of us…. Sunset. Nothing official but something for us. Then I'll give this back to you." Jyeon slides his ring from his finger and puts them both in one hand before pushing them into his back pocket and making it clear he's not going to back down on this. I am not getting it back no matter what I say. If I agreed to put it on my finger, he knows I'll cave and want to make it memorable. He knows me too well.
"Fine. Only nothing over the top. Nothing too showy or.." I sigh. Knowing it's a pointless discussion because it's not anything official, I sort of like the idea deep down. Especially that he suggested it, I get the why.
"Greta will be ecstatic. She always wanted to be a maid of honor. It's on her life goal wish list. She's such a weirdo."
Jyeon breaks into a grin and dives at me, hooking me around the waist before hoisting me up and giving me the most enthusiastic squeeze. He lowers me enough to kiss me and then keeps me suspended a foot from the ground, pinned to him with his arms under my butt, so I can't run away. I rest my hands on his shoulders and give him a furrowed brow, no-nonsense stare. Acting serious and unimpressed with being bullied into it.
"I'm only agreeing to shut you up. If we weren't already marri…." I don't get to finish as he ducks me down and presses his lips to mine. Silencing me with a kiss before placing me on my feet so he can tug me in and deepen it. Kissing me passionately and pushing all other thoughts out of my head. It works like it does every time, and I'm lost in a sea of sensations and gooey emotions that he fires up in me.
I've already begun to cotton onto his little method of having his own way, silencing me anytime I am about to refuse or lay down the law. I'm onto him. His kiss attacks and using hormones to bow me to his will. Not that I hate it, but still…. I might have to find a method of my own, or I will forever be marching to his tune.