"Answer it." Greta picks up my phone and holds it out to me, but I hesitate and stare at the flashing screen instead. Leaving it between us as we both sit tensely on the bed, now facing one another. Her eyes dart from it to me, and she sighs heavily. "Take it."
"It's late. As far as he knows, I'm asleep." I push it away from me but flinch when she grabs my wrist and forces it into my hand, swiping the answer button as she does so. Strangely strong for such a tiny wench.
"Yeah, well, now he knows we're not." She winks, sliding away, and motions for me to lift it before jumping out of bed and heading to the door. She switches the overhead light and blinds me with the sudden assault. "Hi, Jyeon..... Don't keep her up too late. She's a monster when she's tired," she yells loudly, making sure he would have heard her, before sauntering off with a wiggle and a mischievous wave and leaving me alone with my phone. I stare at the lit screen and his name and cave because she's given me no choice. Mad at her for choosing now to turn to his side and seething with curse words at her shitty maneuver.
"Hello." I put it to my ear and get up too, putting zero effort into my greeting and hoping he thinks I'm sleepy. My body is restless and finding renewed listless energy to zap me back to antsy behaviors. I walk to the window, pulling the drapes aside to stare out into the darkness once more in an effort to find tranquillity.
"I guess I didn't wake you? Can I come up? I'm in the lobby downstairs." Jyeon sounds tired, his voice gravelly, and his question startles me. My eyes swept down on autopilot to the scan park below and spot a very familiar dark SUV that took us to the amusement park earlier. I can see the driver sitting alone inside, and it's the same employee from earlier. My stomach flips over, and my blood runs cold with the realization he's right downstairs.
"Umm. Why? I mean, shouldn't you go home and sleep? Aren't you tired…. it was probably stressful?" I start blabbering nonsense, losing my cool for a second. My insides are hitching in butterflies at my panic at seeing him when my brain is this way. He has no idea how much I want to curl up and hide from the world and him tonight.
"I can tell you that when you open the door. I'm coming up. I want to see you." Jyeon hangs up before I can refuse, and I curse at Greta under my breath for putting me in this situation. I know she'll let him in, too, so there's no point dodging this or ignoring the bell. I have no choice but to do this tonight.
I yank open my wardrobe in speed mode and pull out a robe to slide on over my silk nightdress, fix my hair quickly and check my face for any smudges from removing my makeup earlier. He's getting barefaced and natural, and I am not putting effort into this. I tell myself to be strong, put him back at arm's length, and not soften or show warmth for anything. I have no intention of being as stupid as I was earlier, now I am a hundred percent sober and it's time we put an end to this stupid scenario once and for all.
The door goes with a gentle tap, tap, tap so as not to wake my neighbors, and I hesitate. My heart is racing and chest heaving with the shallowness of my breathing, and I march out before Greta does. Trembling all over and flicking my hands out to still their shakes.
"It's Jyeon," I yell as her bedroom door starts to swing and it closes again swiftly. A slight thud and then a giggle from the other side.
"Call me if you need me. I won't come out otherwise." Greta has a cheerful tone to her voice, and I squint at the closed door and wonder if she is still intoxicated. I don't get why she is so pro Jyeon tonight, practically throwing me at him and wondering if it has anything to do with being chased around by Bryant all evening. Maybe that sly dog has whispered in her ear and pulled her to the dark side with his hoe skills. I should have known that playboy still had abilities even when playing nice. Greta isn't easy to break, but Bryant seems to have the magic touch.
I stop behind the front door and take a calming breath to steady myself, sensing his presence on the other side and growing nervous about seeing him so soon. I blow out air dramatically and repeat inside my head 'end this and let's go home' multiple times before finding my nerve. I grab the handle and yank it inwards with a jerk of force and pull on my cold icy Sohla mask, not prepared for how close he is to the door.
I flinch in surprise when I move aside, and I'm faced with him right on within a foot of me, my heart flipping at the sudden proximity. Jyeon steps inside without hesitation, pulls me towards him by the upper arms with a gentle grip and winds me by colliding my body with his as he encircles me in a firm hug. Pulling my face to his neck and cradles the back of my head against him so I can't escape. Entire body on body like he did before, so my arms are trapped between us, and I become almost like a shroud to his muscular frame. I can barely breathe with the sudden forced proximity or having his touch this way again. Cocooned into Jyeon's presence, it's too easy to slide into how good it always feels.
"Don't be mad. Please hear me out. I came back as soon as I could." He leans in and mutters it directly into my ear, sending shivers down my spine as his breath tickles my neck. Trying to be gentle and intimate with me but it only strengthens my resolve. Hating him when I know he's been with her these past hours.
"Who said I was mad?" I snap back and force my palms between us to move us apart, but Jyeon doesn't relent and yanks me back in, folding me tight in his embrace. Smelling of outside, cologne, his own natural body scent, and remnants of the alcohol from earlier. It's a heady mix that's all too potent when combined. I can't fall into the safety of being this way with him, though, and fight the way my body tries to relax as I breathe him in. His hard, sculpted body acts as a protective shield that's been missing all evening.
"I know you're mad. You were mad before I even left, whether you admit it or not, but I had no choice. I had to go deal with this, or it wouldn't have gone away."
"It's got nothing to do with me what or who you do in your own time. I'm not your keeper." I wriggle out of his arms this time, fighting his grip off, and slide away with effort. My face flushes, yet I miraculously keep my features straight and my manner stiff. Pushing his hands off me as he makes another grab at me and follows me inside. I retreat a few steps while he closes the door behind us, and he locks his eyes on me with a strained expression on his handsome face.
"I wasn't at the hospital all this time. I was there for maybe twenty minutes when I first left. I had to go track down her family to come to be with her after I checked she was there, that she was alive and okay." Jyeon moves towards me, serious-toned and calm. Invading my space and air, yet I'm not willing to let him. I can think better when we are separated, and I can't feel his warmth or smell him.
"I told you I don't care." I turn on my heel and head for the side unit where we keep the water jug and start pouring myself a glass to appear nonchalant while I simmer this mood. My skin prickles when his body warms up my back and his arm slides around me level with my shoulder, and I pause and hold my breath. He's not taking the hint that I don't want him near me.
"You can deny it all you want. You sound mad, you're acting mad, and if you didn't care, you wouldn't still wear this to bed tonight." He reaches over my exposed chest, where the robe hangs open over my nightgown, and picks up my wedding ring, which rests on my necklace. Lifting it and holding it in front of my face, turning it in his fingertips while he leans in and presses his cheek against my temple. His skin-on-skin contact makes my stomach clench and my palms turn clammy.
"It's a part of my past. It reminds me not to go backward." I yank it back, elbowing him away and berate my idiocy for still keeping this on and not covering it up properly. I make such stupid mistakes around him, and I'm already pissed and seething enough without him being a smart ass about it. "So, she's fine then? You're little mistress." I divert his attention with bitchiness and throw him a cool look and raised brow. Sounding precisely like Sohla of the past with a haughty tone and clipped way of talking. I want him to see the old me and trigger an old Jyeon response, so this is easier on me. If we fight, that's even better because I am taking no prisoners in this.
I've made up my mind that I want to leave, and the only way to make sure he doesn't follow is to tie everything up and be done before I do. Divorce. The shares issue... OLO… all of it. He wanted my memories to do it, so that's what he's going to get. An end to whatever this was. He's too dangerous for me to stay around. He makes me too weak and confused and wants things that will never work. Greta is correct, and running away is what I am doing, but I know it's the only way to protect myself.
Jyeon narrows his eyes at me and tilts his head to one side as though deciphering my complete mood change from earlier. Studying me as his brow furrows, he chews on his bottom lip with a subtle mannerism. I try and remain cold and icy, having decided that this is the only way to end this farce once and for all before he makes it impossible for me to leave him a second time.