Chereads / I'm His Only Love / Chapter 12 - THE LETTERS

Chapter 12 - THE LETTERS

*Present time. Audra's point of view*

We were on our way to the office, quite tight on time too, thanks to yours truly.

It took me quite a lot of time to fall asleep yesterday. You might have guessed it, too many things on my mind. My phone's battery died during the night as I didn't realise it was low before going to bed, so there was nothing to wake me up.

Well, except for Chris.

Thank God for Chris, coffee and pancakes.

He was the one driving although he was quite zoomed off. I tried to start a conversation with him a couple of times but nothing.

I left him alone, I guess he has been doing quite a lot of thinking too.

When we entered the building a cheerful young girl in reception told us that we could come in, as he was waiting for us. I noticed she kept her eyes on Chris even though I was the one talking to her.

"Good morning Mr Knightly, I hope you haven't been waiting too long" I said, as a bit of an apology, it was barely 11.02 but I like to be early to these things, just in case. I really hate being late.

"Miss Myers, Mr Miller, it's nice to meet you both in person. I hope you're alright. And do not worry, I was with a client just till a few minutes ago, you're just on time."

"Glad to hear that. I'm sorry about your father passing, he was a very dear friend of the family." Mr Knightly Sr. was my mom's layer for a long time, ever since dad's passing actually, as we did need some help to take care of some legal stuff. He passed away less than a year ago, that's why we never met his son before and why it seemed so weird to me to deal with him.

I'm sure he's a good lawyer, but his behaviour these past days has me confused…

"Thank you. I'm sorry for your loss too. I didn't get enough time to get well acquainted with your mother, but she always seemed a very nice woman to me."

We both nodded politely as a response, falling into an awkward silence where none of us seemed capable of reacting. I always hated giving – and mostly receiving – condolences. I know it's polite and all, but it always seems to put you in such an awkward situation.

Chris was the first to react, cleaning his throat and proceeding to talk "Shall we start? In your calls, you seemed to indicate the matter was of most urgency."

"Yes, sure. Please, do sit down." Mr Knightly Jr. proceeded to sit too and grabbed a folder from his desk. First, it looked like he was going to open it, but after a few seconds of hesitation, he decided against it. "I'm sorry if I was too adamant in my calls, I know this is a hard time for you, but I truly never had a request such as your mother's and I wanted to proceed to fulfil her wishes as soon as possible."

Chris and I looked at him with perplexed faces, more and more questions now running through our minds, then we exchanged a questioning look. The lawyer took the hint and decided to proceed, almost as he wanted to make sure we didn't know anything.

"Well, you see, most of Diane's possessions would be split up between the two of you. She gave you the same rights to everything - The money of her bank accounts would be properly divided and shared between the two and the same with other possessions I would mention in detail afterwards. But, there's something else, something that's a bit different."

"And what it's that?" I asked.

"I would love to tell you all and not be so mysterious about this but first I should handle you this." He opened up the folder and grabbed two - apparently equal - envelopes from it. "It's a letter from your mother, you'll need to read it first and afterwards I would answer any of your questions or explain it further if needed."

"I don't understand, what is in it?" Chris asked confused while accepting the envelope and reaching to open it.

"Wait!" Chris looked up at him, stopping what he was doing with a puzzled expression. I held my letter in the air – I had just received it - sharing the same look "My instructions were that you should read it in private. Separately." Seeing as we didn't say a word, he proceeded. "There's a couple of private areas free now, my secretary will take you there. Read them carefully and meet me back here when you're done. Don't worry, please take all the time you need."

We were both so baffled by what just happened that neither of us said a word while we were accompanied to another room. Why such a mystery with everything?

Well, we'll find out in just a couple of minutes.

I entered the room, suddenly everything seemed very silent. Too silent.

Just 3 minutes ago I was ready to rip this envelope open and finally find out what is this really all about, but now all I can do is stare blankly at the envelope.

I read my name on it with my mother's handwriting and all of I sudden realisation hits me… This is the last time I would hear from her – like the last conversation, just this time I won't be able to answer.

Maybe this seems like putting too much thought into it, but I couldn't help it.

Tears started building in my eyes and I sat down for a bit, staring at the letter through my tears, not feeling capable of reading its content without breaking once again.

After a while, I started opening the letter, slowly, trying to prepare.

I was curious about all of this at first. Now all I want is to read my mother's words like she's still here with me.

Finally, I proceeded, and this was what it said:

"Audra, my dear beloved angel, how can I even begin such a difficult letter?

I guess I could say something ominous like 'if you're reading this it means I'm not here anymore' but that feels like too much. Not my style, right?

Just 2 days ago I had a very hard doctor's appointment. All I could assimilate is that there's not much time left for me… Half a year at best he said… I knew I was going to die, we all did, but I really didn't expect it to be so soon.

I still had so many plans.

I've been doing a lot of reflecting ever since, and taking advantage that Chris was away for the week – so he could not see me - I sulked, cried, swore at everything and got mad. But by the end of it, I made my peace with it, so now I'm proceeding to write this to you both.

My beautiful baby girl, I know is impossible not to be sad at this moment but you know things would get better and I went away happy. I came to the realisation that I couldn't have asked for a better life, even with all life thrown at us, we always got out of it stronger, the three of us.

You and Chris both have a good life, you always pursued your goals and archived them and I couldn't be prouder of any of you. You're strong and you're both fighters, so I'm not worried to leave you as I know you'll always get over whatever life throws at you.

But reflecting on our lives also got me to a point where I realised something was missing.

Observing Chris, now that he's back here with me, I realise that he isn't a happy man, not completely at least. And I realised I haven't seen his happiness completed, not even once since he left this house - and you in it. I never wanted to accept it, but it is the truth.

And there's you, my baby girl, you've been avoiding this house – your home – for the last decade. Not to mention that I could always see the break-up cracked something inside you forever.

All I ever wanted for you is to be happy and I can't go away knowing you aren't. At least not completely. And most of all, I don't want any of you to be alone, not when you have each other. You're family above all.

That's all I'm asking: for you to mend things, for you to be a family again.

I'm not asking you to date again (though let me just say that that might be one solution…)

But to be the friends you once were. Support each other like you used to do. You both went through things any kid your age shouldn't have, you understood each other better than anyone and you had your backs through thick and thin. Don't you remember?

Don't leave each other alone now. Stop this feud once and for all.

Be a family again.

And please, don't do it just for me but for the sake of you both.

I'm guessing that if you're reading this then you might have already seen each other and I hope it was on good terms. Cause if it wasn't then my last requirement would be really hard.

This is my last wish but it would be backed up legally. You both will share possession of the house, just if you both live at the house, together, for the next 10 months. I don't mean simply going to the house every weekend but to move there. If not, the house would be sold and its benefits donated.

I've thought this through and I know this won't disturb your professional lives. Chris is already here and I know you can set up your studio in the house and work comfortably. I'm sure Robb would understand if you talk to him.

I guess – and hope – that neither of you would want to lose your home. And I also hope you'll be adult enough to solve this once and for all.

It's the only way I could think of where you'll be together time enough for you to talk things through and mend your relationship a bit. In any other case scenario, I feel like you'll just meet at the funeral, talk a bit and then ignore each other again for the rest of your lives.

By the end of the stay, you can freely decide what to do next and the house would be equally divided between the two.

I think I'm not asking too much, just for my family to stick together.

Please don't be angry because of this, think it through for a bit, you might even find it a good idea.

I love you, my darling girl. You were always my bright star in the dark night, the strong one. Stay strong for me and keep making me proud.

Don't forget to enjoy life and be happy.

Love, Mum.