ALEX'S POV:
The anger coursed through my veins, and even the cool air touching my skin was evaporating as I drove past the road. It's suffocating even to breathe. What the fuck is wrong with me? Or maybe her? My vision was partially blurred because of anger and I cannot think anything straight right now. I was only clouded by her thoughts.
"Someone you will be worth?"
What am I to her? Have I not been able to enter her heart after all these days? Don't I mean anything to her at all?
And here I am going crazy all about her here. Everything about her makes me crazy each fucking day. How can she not be affected at all? Does she not see my love for her? Not even an inch?
Even though it has only been a few months, I can't stop thinking about her. Why? What is she doing to me? I haven't felt such a strong attraction towards anyone. Definitely not after getting rejected. Twice.
"This is the way I am!"
Her words began to ring in my head. And it made me confuse, even more, about the way she portrays her life. Why, why does she live this way?
"This is the contract for us. This is how we will be"
Why? Why do we have to maintain this fucking contact? Why can't we just love each other like other people? Why is she so difficult?
I sighed in frustration. I was so frustrated that no matter how hard I tried, I could never make her stay away from my mind. I still felt her presence in every corner of my mind. Her little laughs, her little pouts... Her pretty eyes... and her fucking gorgeous body. I was so fucking tempted by her.
Even more, when I know that beneath that fierce face, she was still the most innocent, beautiful girl I have ever seen. She just doesn't know it yet. I am aware that, she doesn't like to talk about her past, but I want to know. I want to know all about her. From her small happy moments to her darkest secrets. I want to be something more than just a "boy who is a friendly fuck."
But Jesus, this is difficult. She puts this barrier between us, that restricts me from even peeking into her heart. Her true self. Someday all I want us, as in the catharsis in its rawest form, and not just only naked.
I want to be beside her, every morning when she wakes up and I want to be her every night's goodnight kiss. Not just Friday to Sunday fucking buddy.
But I know she doesn't want me the way I want her. And now that I know, that I don't really mean anything to her, I cannot let her play with me like this. What if someday she wakes up and does not need me anymore? What if someday she wants to end everything that is between us? I know she's the most stubborn ass I've ever seen in my life. Extremely introverted in this case. About her life. And then again, she was also Valeria. And I know when the day comes, Valeria won't hesitate to get rid of me, like the tea bag after being used.
What will I do then? I will never be able to put myself together when that day will come. I won't be able to bear another heartbreak like that. Another insult when she will choose someone else over me. Was I a mere fuck buddy to her? To everyone?
Uhhh... Fucking hell, I think I am going insane right now.
I clutched on my wheels, releasing all the anger on them as I saw my knuckles go all white due to the pressure. The car accelerated as I stepped on the accelerator to speed up. Luckily through all the other traffic, I could drive swiftly through the night sky.
I need to get away from here. At least for some time.
The more I tried to calm down, the more it took me back to memories of her. Her black clouded eyes, her perfectly heart-shaped lips, her cute little nose, her beautiful smile, her black waterfall hair... everything about her just makes me crazy.
My mind just cannot stop thinking about the time when her skin was on mine. I like how she teases me, how she pleases me, and how she yells my name to me when I enter her fucking wet pussy. As if she was just made for me. I fit into her perfectly.
How can I be the only one to become crazy like this? Does she really not feel anything about me?
Wait, is she perhaps looking for Mr. Han too?
What if she is?
I am nothing compared to him right now. He has his own established empire... his own business and he is indeed handsome too. Comparatively, he could literally give her the world. Money, security... family...And look at me, all I have to offer is my sincerity to her, I can only make her my world. I guess both were different. I guess she needs more than I can ever offer.
Is she perhaps thinking of seeing Mr. Han now? Is it because I am getting old for her? Does she need a new toy? Or could possibly is Mr. Han trying to get her? I saw his face that day, the way she looked at Mira, had made me recklessly possessive about her. How can he not? She really is beautiful after all. I couldn't stand it if anyone would touch her. Especially when I know, I was not even on her favourite list.
I remember what happened last time when she tried to get back at me with that bastard at the club. Unfortunately, it backfired her in the worst possible way.
Suddenly my mind flashed back to the time the bastard in the club tried to touch her. Was it not for her, that motherfucker would have been dead by now! My arms flexed around the steering wheel as soon as my mind flashed back to that day. My blood started boiling thinking about that pathetic person. His face, how he looked when he checked her out like the leech he is.
I wanted to kill that fucking bastard right there for daring to touch what's mine. Or maybe not mine at all. But my blood boiled whenever his face flashed in front of my eyes. No matter if she isn't mine, no one should be treated the way that fucking bastard treated her that night. Especially when it is Mira.
My mother taught me, women are the purest form of angels on the earth. And if treated right, they could show the way of heaven. If not, a man could end up in hell.
But now, I need to calm down, in order to not cause another accident. And to stop that, I need to punish the man, who really deserves it. I called someone without controlling my anger. I know only one person can help me right now.
"Hello?" The person answered from the other end of the phone.
"I need you to find me one person. Now."
As he acknowledged and disconnected the phone call, I stepped on the accelerator towards my destination. The rest of the journey faded from my memory.
******
It was almost morning, I reached home. Charlotte. Oh, I miss the fresh air around here. Everything was far away from New York. Compared to New York, Charlotte was much more peaceful. I parked my car outside my mansion and walked down the steps towards the door. I missed this view. The big white marble mansion of Colman Conners. It was quite an eye-catch of the town though.
But no matter how much I loved being back home, I miss her. I remember how much fun we had all these weeks. No matter how angry I was with her, I still missed her a lot. But that is what it is. I need time and she needs space to think about what she really wants. I needed time for myself too. Away from her. Maybe that is better for both of us. If this needs to end right here, then be it. At least I will be ready for that now.
My hair was messed up and the sleeves of the shirt were folded enough to see my veins and the family tattoo. The trinity logo. I curved it with roses and thorns though. Looks like a normal tattoo for others. Whereas it's denoted the family establishments of Conners. Several of my known men approached me, and I acknowledged them with a smile and a nod. I practically grew up here, Played with them. They were our men from the company and a few of them the guards, but they have been my friend always.
"Is mom home?" I asked one of the guards.
"Yes sir, she is at the tea table..."
As I handed over my car keys, before he can reply, I said "It's okay, I will surprise her..." I opened the door and entered. There I saw her. A middle-aged woman with beautiful black waterfall hair and pretty eyes. My mom. She was sitting elegantly at the tea table as she was sipping her herbal tea. And she was sitting with...
"What the hell is he doing here?" I roared. My blood boils seeing the man I never wanted to see.
Mt father. Or so-called father, only by name.
My mom quickly got up from the chair and walked toward me.
"Alex..." She gasped a little in surprise. "What are you doing here?" She asked. "And...What happened to you?" She asked, cupping my face in her gentle hands. But my vision was stuck on the middle-aged person who was sitting across the table. His slightly greyish sleek hair and that three-piece suit still make him look appealing. But somehow, I don't like seeing him. In my house.
"I asked what is he doing here?" I demanded, taking a few vigorous steps towards him, but mom grabbed me in his arms to prevent me from beating him off. My clothes were all tattered, my hair messed up and fucked up my mind, but I didn't care. First Mira, and then him!
This is too much. I am gonna kill him. Now.
"Alex..." She raised her voice to grab my attention, still holding me tightly in her embrace. "He is still your father. So, behave."
"He is not!" I snarled back so that he could hear me too. "I spent most of my childhood without him. I don't need him now. Not then, not now. He is dead to me," I said crystal clear.
I noticed his face dropping briefly, but it didn't last for long before he reverted to his prideful straight face. The proud man he is. Who never cared for his family. Father, or wife or his son. So, after all these years, finally we have learned to live without this man. We don't need him back.
"Why is he here after all these years? Who called him?" I asked with all my rage that was rushing through my vein like an arrow shooting through my skin.
"I called him" the voice broke through us as we turned around to see. It was none other than my grandpa, and I stared at him in disbelief.
How can he? Did he already forget what he promised my mother years ago? Why is this happening to me?
I closed my eyes and pushed back my hair as I screamed to let go of my anger and frustration.
******
MIRA'S POV:
"Audemars Piguet's Haute Joaillerie Sapphire Orbe!"
As I unboxed the gift, he had just given me before he left, I saw one of the most expensive watches in the world! 'Audemars Piguet's Haute Joaillerie Sapphire Orbe'.
Audemars Piguet's Sapphire Orbe series is one of its high-jewellery timepieces. This spectacular timepiece is named after the river that crosses Le Brassus, located in the village. It features a river of precious stones in white, blue, and orange. The timepiece is set with over 12,000 gemstones that are all carefully selected, cut, and set by hand. There is a blue dome in the centre, totally covered with blue sapphires, which reveals the watch's 18-karat white gold dial paved with orange sapphires. The timepiece is powered by a tiny quartz movement and has a bracelet made of articulated components for maximum comfort and flexibility on the wrist.
I have heard about this masterpiece but have never seen it before. Of course, I didn't. It is one of the rare pieces. My eyes kinda popped out of their sockets as I sat there in confusion.
How can a college student afford this? Is he doing something illegal that is getting him this much money? It's not the first time it's appeared in this game. I know many students who embarked on the path of illegal drugs and jobs for the sake of money.
Previously I wondered how he could afford a fucking penthouse in New York and various collections of those cars and now Audemars Piguet's Haute Joaillerie Sapphire Orbe out of nowhere. However, I didn't realize it until now.
Who is he? Or at least what is he up to? No matter what, he needs to answer me. I won't tolerate it if he's sinking into the dept of the ocean where there's no return. He really is a good student with a good future. No matter if I am sleeping with him. He is still my student. Technically. So, if I have to be rude to him, in order to bring her back down on the right track I will.
I was debating with myself if it would be a great idea to ask him directly or not. But eventually, I had to! I can't accept such expensive gifts from him. Not when I know they can't be bought legally.
I was still looking at the extraordinary watch in my hands and my mind kept thinking about all the possibilities of how he could afford all this.
I spent the night worrying about him. Surprisingly I couldn't sleep at all. Guess I was put into the habit of being with him. It was the middle of Saturday night when he left so suddenly. It was unannounced. But one thing was clear, I was missing him. So much. My bed apparently felt so cold and empty without him.
Had he been here now, we could be laughing, watching a movie, or maybe having mind-blowing sex in the middle of the night, not caring a bit about my neighbours. It was so much fun to be with him. It felt so good. Like I could be the best version of myself when I am with him. A phase I never knew existed in me. Even though I know this all is just a temporary, arrangement-ship for both of us, I terribly wanted it to last forever.
I could spend days and nights sleeping on his chest, inhaling his intoxicated strong scent and his listeners to his laughs. It always has the power to make my day better.
As I lay in my bed, I found the large bed to be cold at his side, and the entire house felt so lonely right now. He left, but his memories didn't. Something hot and wet slips down my cheeks and the salty taste of it make me realize I was crying.
But the question was why?
I didn't do anything wrong, right?
My mind flashed back to memories of him and how we laughed together in this house. How he teased me... how he took care of me on my good and bad days... and how made me blush, every time he is around. Whether we are fucking or not. I was missing him. All of him. His presence, his scent, his smile, his kisses... his touch.
I opened my phone so that I could call him, to hear his voice one more time, but then I stopped remembering our contract. I cannot call him unless it is about something urgent. What can I possibly say to him even if I call him? Plus, he said he needed time away from me. I do not want to bug him, no matter how much I want to dial his number and tell him everything that was hidden in my heart.
To tell him I am terrified to lose him and I want him back in my apartment now.
I sighed as I switched off the screen of my phone and kept it somewhere on the bed, after fighting with my inner self that calling him is probably not a good idea now.
That night I could barely sleep as all I did was think all about him. What must he be doing right now? Is he still angry?
I wanted to know. Wanted to hear his voice.
*******
"No way!" I yelled at my mirror that I have eye bags under my eyes today. Why wouldn't it be? I barely slept last night. And today is the day of the fucking success party.
Ugh... I am so tired. And I look terrible now.
"There is nothing that can't be fixed, Mira. And no one knows better to make things up, apart from you." I said to myself as I pushed myself back to bed once again, all grumpy in the morning.
Ugh... What am I going to do?
Probably a lot of work on this fucking tired face!
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Happy reading guys. Know that you really matter the most to me and I can never be able to express how grateful I am to you all, for giving this book a chance. Hope you are enjoying it.