I went back to my room after the story Aunt Gaia told me, and I continued reading the books. When I moved onto the second one that is the one about werewolves, it spoke about how the werewolf community was being operated in a monarchical system, where they had an alpha king. It was said that the alpha king had absolute power over the werewolf kingdom. According to the book, The alpha king was 500 years old, and he never had a mate. it was said that because he was more wolf than human, the moon goddess would not be so cruel as to pair him with some one else. Though I thought that was cruel because , c'mon the guy lived for 500 years and he should be able to control his wolf, but that's when Cerridwen decided to leave him mateless for 500 years, imagine.
The book also contained some prophecies about werewolves, but one of them particularly stuck out to me, it was talking about a female werewolf with the mark of the blue moon, who could control all elements of the earth. It was said that she would have the power to put an end to the werewolf race and the power to save them at the same time. Her blood could make a wolf stronger and it could at the same time kill them. While reading the book, I couldn't help but think about how powerful the werewolf would be and the kind of power that rests upon her shoulders, I mean she has the power to bring an end to an entire race, and I can't even imagine how she would be able to shoulder such a huge responsibility.
At night, right before dinner, i went to check up on my mom because I was stuck in my room all day reading, and I must say that I know a lot more than I ever did concerning werewolves and witches, but there was one thing I still could not figure out, and that was how they were intersecting, how their histories was related, well acoording to how Aunt Gaia put it --" their intersecting history"--
As I got to the room, I knocked on her door, and then I heard a weak voice saying "come in" , and I couldn't help but get more worried. I walked into her room, and it was so dark and bleak, it was at the same time quiet and somber that I could feel my mom's sadnesses in the air of the room. She didn't even pull open the blinds; even the lights were off. I walked close to her bed, sat down next to her and said " mom, I know this question does not sound right, but how are you doing? I mean how do you feel?, I just don't know how to put it, but you being locked up in her, in this room all alone is not going to help. I know it's all my fault that all of these things happened and I know that you must resent me right now, but I'm sorry," I say while crying. " I'm so sorry. I should not have interfered, and I should have stayed in my room like always but I was just trying to.. to ...to protect you.." I stuttered out.
At that point my mom sat up and faced me, and when I looked up at her face, I realised that what she was going through was more than I could imagine and there was no way my mom could hate me, because the look I saw in her eyes was filled with so much love and protection, and I knew that she would do anything to save me.
She held my cheeks, with eyes full of tears and said" I would never, ever.....ever resent you Phoebe. You are me pup, my daughter and I love you so much, more than you can ever imagine. but right now, I'm filled with so much sadness and pain and misery, I mean I could feel it when I stabbed your father in his chest, I could feel the bond twist and when it snapped the recoil was so hard to bear, but i looked at you and I knew that I couldn't afford to breakdown there, I just had to be strong till I knew that I had gotten you to somewhere safe. Yes I know that I kept a lot of things from you and that you have a lot of questions, but right now I just have to be alone to deal with the painful void in my heart. I am not ignoring you or resenting you, I just need to learn how to deal with this grief and I'll come out of it later on. I just need you to give me time...huhn? can you do that for me?"
I looked at her and I nodded my head as hard as I could, as if I could give her more comfort that way " Thank you my love. Thank you so much. I will try as much as possible to ...to..to get my feelings back together. " she said, and I knew that she was trying really hard not to grief so much, but he was her mate and I had to let her know that she could take as much time as she needed to heal her wounds. and then I got into the covers with her and she hugged me while saying" we will be fine Phoebe no matter how long it takes , and I want you to know that I love you so much, alright?". "Yes Mom, I'll never doubt that again" I reply while snuggling into her chest.
And so I passed my days in Aunt Gaia's home while learning more about my lineage and at the same time being there for my mom in what ever way I could. so I could say everything was going well.
Until that night when I walked into my mom's room and I just sort of noticed that she was not getting any better, and that maybe I had been ignoring or lying to myself about the signs that my mom might just leave...