Today is something called "mating day"
It's a special day where the moon turns purple, and demons come out to breed. Personally, I haven't been targeted by these horny beasts. I'm sure I could spread my genes around if I really tried, but I'm not interested. Foul beasts suck men dry.
Mating season usually lasts a whole month, but mating day is always when everyone is most active, as far as I can tell. That's probably where it got its name.
I haven't been to earth in a long time, but I hear that mating day is also a day of romance on earth. Isn't it called "valentines day"? I don't know. something-tines day. That's close enough right?
It's pretty boring. Instead of breeding, people usually just give gifts and kiss. Why aren't they ripping them apart? That's so weird, I don't understand human culture.
As for what actually happened today, I've been feeling a strange, sharp pain in my right leg. It happened shortly after a fight with one of my neighbors over food. I won, obviously, but I got really badly hurt. My whole right arm was torn off, my left leg got scratched up badly, and now my right leg hurts! This sort of stuff can heal over time, but my missing arm will take a few days to recover.
I'm not looking forward to tomorrow. I predict that I'll have to really hide and avoid battles as much as I can. A missing arm sucks.