My pussy hurt. Like, really hurt. I was hardly capable enough to stand on both feet, much less walk as instructed.
While this ugly creature cut through the tall grass, exposing my already burning eyes to even greater heat and dastardly light, the resident tormentor didn't comment on anything.
He simply followed along, playing mute and tame. Which I'd have loved, he really was. So I could take revenge immediately, of course.
Nevertheless, there was one particularly ignorant creature buying his crap. The... what was that race called again?
Bi-Muis? Bi-Shuis? Something silly sounding just like that. Stepping through the grass while giving my best to ignore my sore pushy, I had to grin.
Even when swinging around with these two pointed sticks, the two heads ever so slightly glanced in the living stone's direction, wary and calculating.
What would I give if I had the chance to simply answer this unspoken question? I would sure as hell pack some pep.
But no, there was no such chance. Not that I haven't tried. Let's just say... my ass cheeks hurt still.
This fucking uncivilised brute of a grumpy trashcan! No jokes allowed here, only suffering. For them too, I hope.
My ardent wish was about to come true, as the stupid beast came closer to a certain village nestled in between unassuming weeds and small rocks.
Like the victor bringing home a big haul, she—the stench of one in heat gave her gender away straight—strode in with pride.
Ruination followed just behind her. Now, it wouldn't take long for disaster to strike. Suddenly, silently!
But without a single oh-so-tiny possibility of escape. If only this ignorant leading us showed more arrogance, he would explode sooner.
And all of us would have less time to waste in this bright dump. More of these folks crowded around the hunter, surprise and curiosity written on their furry faces.
No matter where I looked, all had two heads donning distinct expressions each! If I had known of these funny things earlier, we could've introduced interesting sacrifices back in the temple.
With a bit of luck, I might have become head priestess as well! While my thoughts revolved around an interesting future I no longer had, things happened in real life.
This couple of mere beasts had started talking, kicking up a verbal storm worthy of my clan's decennial elder meeting.
My headache intensified. How could it not? I had not drunk a calming potion! There was none around in these parts of the frigging overground. Not even ingredients!
"Uwaa?" "Auuhh... a-auh?" "Wuuu... ahhh?" "Auuu~!" "Wuuuuu~!!" Then what I never thought would ever happen played out in front of my incredulous eyes.
The bastard child, queen of our group and sole stopper capable of reducing that brutal creature's wrathful outbursts, had jumped out of his broad hands.
She was now rolling ungracefully on the dirty village floor, coming to a stop in front of another bundle, dirtier and made of brushwood.
From there, two tiny heads, bald and wrinkly, poked out. The two tiny creatures met, staring curiously into each other's big eyes.
The queen grabbed her ears as if in wonder, then proceeded to grab the beast's, one hand for each pair.
It provoked discomfort, as was plain to see. "Protect my baby. She's gone rouge again!" The beast yapped and bared her fangs while the mother or whatever came jumping from afar.
Then, it bit the queen. My face contorted in a beautifully sadistic grin. They are sooooo dead! "Blood shall flow," I muttered.
Yet... neither the mother reached the cub, nor did any of the other villagers nor did the beast do any harm.
There was no blood either. Only tentacles lashing out to everyone, binding whoever could move—me included—until we could do so no longer.
Muffled sounds flooded the place. Only bell-like laughter from the queen interrupted the despairing rendition of an orchestra guided by the brutal creature's iron hand.
She... found happiness amidst the beast's bites and tears. No skin was torn. No sign showed on it either.
Even from afar, I noticed the sharp and small teeth both heads were aptly equipped with. Yet for the queen, it could as well have been a comfortable massage.
She squealed again, jumping up and diving straight into the bundle of brushwood. Then, the two rolled around for a while longer.
One party happy and curious, the other despairing and uncomfortable. Somehow, I felt a bit good. Which made me shudder in fright.
How could I be happy with such lukewarm torture that essentially was none at all?! Had my tastes degraded to such dangerous, unworthy levels?
This could not be! I was head priestess material! I oversaw the holy sacrifice chambers! I... happy with just... this?!
The world shuddered around me as I wished I was dead once more. Meanwhile, the two dirty furry creatures rolled around a bit more.
Wherever they moved, the tentacles backed off. Sometimes, even entire wooden huts were displaced!
The happy squeals did not stop. Over time, I realised that the other creature had grown somewhat accepting of the treatment, indulging in questionable practice herself.
As if in heat, her two heads started sniffing. One centred in on the backside, the other on the frontside.
Only to fail miserably, as the heads did not grow on a long neck allowing for such strange movement.
The beast fell on all fours, her heads chattering as they banged against each other. The queen roared in laughter.
It did not take long for the circus to continue. The beast child rediscovered her vigour and3learning from her mistake—focused only on one side.
The backside. As the warm air was blown there where normally none ever reached, the queen squealed in uneasiness and speedily crawled back to the tentacle monster.
The beast child followed, possibly seeing this whole farce as a game of tag as each head yapped in what I could only interpret as laughter.
I thought her fate was sealed. But again, he did not own up to my expectations. He merely picked the queen up... as well as the offending beast.
What followed was a gentle tickling lesson, making both squeal in happiness once more before they fell asleep, tired from the escapades.
They played for over an hour already! "Distinguished guests. May we invite you for tea?" At that moment, I realised that the village did have mighty figures even I could not discover.
Only... they didn't deign the earlier situation as anything worthy of their intervention. Somehow, my ardent wishes were all trampled upon even today. Talk about rotten luck!