Ugh, am I back? It's dark and *yawn*. Wait... am I... drowsy?
I close my eyes and feel the familiar caress of sleep bring me to the land of dreams.
I'm back. I can finally sleep! Who cares if it's dark. Must be just a blackout or something. I'll... just... *yawn* take a breather.
*Clang*
Huh?
*Du du du du du*
Ugh. What the fuck! I finally managed to sleep after god knows how long and they decide to do construction in my neighborhood?!
*Crash*
Damn it! Just you wait. I'll-
*Thud*
Ow! Something hit my head when I stood up? Is it the head board of my bed?
*Tap*
What?
*Tap* *Tap*
Is this stone? And this size... am I in a coffin!? Oh for fuck's sake. Did my body die while I was in Garden of Days and they buried me here? If so, why the fuck would they choose stone as my coffin!? Damn, I swear if it's Michael's idea, I'd twist his head just before it snaps.
As I continue to asses my space, I try to push the lid off of the coffin. No dice. I guess the dirt's preventing me from moving it.
*Murmur* *Murmur*
Are those people I hear? Damn, it's either my grave's shallow or some grave robbers decided to see if I have any valuables. Either way, I hope they get me out of here.
...
...
Wait, I can use magic no? How the hell did I forget that?
[Teleport]
As I say the words, the magic circle forms but only for a second.
*Fwhoooom* *Fizzle*
Ugh... not working. Is it because I'm back on Earth that my magic ain't working?
*Murmur* *Murmur*
The voice seems closer now. Wait, voices plural! There are a few people near my coffin. Also, if my ears are still working, I think that's demonic tongue I hear!
My heart pounds. Demons? If I'm back on Earth, there shouldn't be demons around. So either two things happened: 1. I didn't get back or 2. They somehow followed me here.
"Finale" a female voice announces.
She's probably closest to me since I could hear her words a little clear.
*Crack*
A light flashes through a tiny crack that forms at the corner of the coffin. Well, I guess I'm getting out of here after all.
As I slide the lid, more of the sunlight hit my face. Oh yeah! THIS is what I've been missing! Good ol' mister sunlight. Damn game couldn't even make realistic sunlight. Plus, the entire time, those damn clouds were covering the sky.
I attempt to stand but it seems that being stationary for a long ass time made my legs numb. So, I instinctively grab the nearest thing to prop myself up.
"Let go of my daughter you fiend!" a low, growly, voice yells from the distance. Such a familiar demonic voice. I wonder where I heard that before?
"Argh! Will you just shut the fuck up please?!" I yell as I slide more of the lid off of the coffin and using whatever my hand's holding, I stand up. "First I hear construction noises and now you guys are entering my room without my permission? Should I just call the cops on you?"
As my eyes adjust to the light, I see a very weird scene. A bunch of fancy demons surround me with their weapons drawn. Meanwhile, I'm buck naked in the middle of what seems to be a construction site. I glance and in the corner of my eyes, I see an elf who's shitting himself and a demon who's unleashed his real form.
"Y-you!" the now gargantuan demon yells.
I know I've heard that voice before. What wave was he in. Think, think, think, Richard..... Ah! I got it.
"Mammon?! Is that you?" I say cheerfully. "I thought you were a gonner man! I never knew I'd see you again."
"No, no, no, no, no, you asshole. Why are you here?!" Mammon mutters in a panic.
Meanwhile, the other demons look at him in confusion while I begin to feel fingers claw at my hand. Wait.. fingers? I look and see that I grabbed someone's neck. A young girl's neck in fact. In normal circumstances, I'd let her go, but she's a demon.
"What? Why am I here?" I ask in return while slowly gripping tighter. Then, I find my voice drip with violence as I finish, "I should ask you that question. Why are you demons in my world?"
*Whoosh*
At that, all of them rush at me in the blink of an eye. Each weapon aiming for my vitals: the neck, the heart, the lungs, and one kid even coils her legs around my head.
"Let go of Mary," a blue demon threatens me with an icy glare.
"Come on Mammon," I chuckle. "Didn't you teach these kids that just killing the guy's better than threatening him to let the hostage go?"
"No, wait, Rorschach! Let them go!" Mammon pleads on his knees while his face is buried on the ground. "These kids don't know anything! I'm begging you."
"Father..." they all gasp in surprise.
"Haaaaah, come on man. If you beg me like that, I'd look like the bad guy," I say.
Mammon's changed. He's not the same greedy demon who would even use a hostage to save his life. I learned from Caras that for a demon to bow and show the roots of their wings is the ultimate sign of vulnerability and surrender. And here he is, doing that for these kids.
"You with the slit eyes," I call out to the blue demon. "Why did you threaten me? You could've just killed me when you had the chance."
He scoffs at my suggestion. "I don't know where you came from, but we are not the same barbarians who live in the <
This kid's really got me curious now.
"Hey Mammon!" I call out. " Can you tell your kids to stand down? And also, get me some damn clothes. I don't know what's going on in the world but I'm assuming that anti-pervert laws still apply."
"Y-yes!" Mammon replies excitedly. "Children, stand down! Get your asses here and leave him alone. Adresin! Wake up and get him some clothes!"
At the mention of his name, the elf that was in a daze all this time snaps back to reality and scuttles off.
The young demons follow Mammon's orders and one by one, they peel away from me. I also let go of the poor girl I used as a support for my numb legs. However, there is one demon who still threatens my neck with his cold blade.
"Simon! What the fuck are you doing still standing there?!" Mammon yells.
"Ridiculous..." he mutters.
"What?!" Mammon asks in bewilderment.
"As a member of the 7 Princes of Hell, how can you just bow down to a human?!" he yells.
"Oh? Simon was it? Man, you got guts kid," I comment proudly and eye him from head to toe. "Mammon, you ok if I smack him around a bit? You demons are resistant to physical damage and have good regeneration anyway even in this world right?"
Mammon hesitates a bit and looks at Simon. Seeing that this young man won't relent no matter what he says, he sighs and waves his hand in dismissal.
"Now, I don't know what you did to Father for him to act like that, but I, Simon Lupinus, will put you in your place. Human," he says with venomous intent.
"What?! You got a last name?" I exclaim in surprise. "Lupinus huh, that's so cool. Hey Mammon! Did you come up with that yourself?"
*Whoosh*
The dagger that was on my neck carves through the air.
"Again, you could've just cut my throat man. Why would you do this hair slicing bullshit?" I ask as strands of my hair flutter from where he tried to slice me.
No response. Instead, he pivots his leg and swiftly kicks me on my side.
*Tap*
I easily deflect it with my palm. In fact, as he rushes me, I don't even move an inch from my spot.
*Yawn*. "Is this all you can do? You're too damn slow man. I thought you were gonna put me in my place," I mock the prideful demon in front of me.
His cheeks obviously blush as he continues his barrage of slices and kicks. He looks constipated and I begin to feel sorry for him. But, I need this kid to learn his lesson for being so damn racist. He reminds me of that last girl I saw before leaving. Pisses me off just thinking about it.
His assaults last for a while. But impressive as he might be, eventually, he runs out of steam.
"Just... haaah... what... haaah... are you?" he says with labored breathing.
I stoop down to look him in the eye and with one big smile I reply, "Why don't you ask your dad when you've cooled your head?"
*Flick*
*BOOOOOM*
*CRASH*
.....
As the dust settles, everyone's quiet. Including me.
I only flicked him on the forehead. I did the same damn thing with Caras that one time when he was being annoying and it only sent him five feet away from me!
"Shit... did I kill him?" I mutter in disbelief.
At once, everyone rush to the crater he created on impact. Good thing we're a couple meters underground. If I flicked him on the road, it could've levelled a building. To my surprise, the kid wobbles back up and glares at me.
I grin from ear to ear.
"Shit, kid. Sorry I couldn't control my strength but you're damn tough for someone so young," I say full of excitement.