Anastasia:
What? How? When? My head couldn't wrap it all. As much I would like to fool thinking it's nothing, I couldn't . I have never seen someone so bare with their emotions and it's...s-scaring me. True, I'm scared and of what I don't know.
How could I miss this? Why now? Or maybe it's always been there , I just failed to see it.
Why Zack? Why? I know what I saw is real, raw and forlorn. Should I confront him or I should keep it to myself. I shouldn't think of it in first place. For the love of God I consider him as my brother and looked upto him.
I should feel disgusted. He should disgust me but for some reason I don't nor that I ever can. I don't think I could ever be disgusted by him knowing him as the man who spent his childhood playing with me; the man who spent his teenage teaching me how to ride a bicycle instead of partying with his friends and the man who spent of all his life loving me , just not the way I thought .
Didn't he think I would find out? Did he want me to find out?
Here I'm laying in my bed just staring at my ceiling. I didn't even bring myself to eat that delicious Stroganoff , it has always been my favourite but I couldn't bring myself to eat , seeing him in front of me . My throat felt all clogged up and mind felt heavier. The way he was looking at me , as if he compelling me to bare my soul to him and the worst part is that I felt myself surrendering to all his whims.
So, I made the obvious excuse to him and dashed to my room as if my soul is on fire.
Exhaustion passed me, my eyes felt droopy . I fell in a deep slumber hoping it would escape me from reality.
Lies, I know but anything that helps stalling the inevitable, I will embrace it whole heartedly.
I woke up to loud banging at the door. "-na Miss Ana , are you up?" Shit it was Jesse ." I'm up Jesse , I will be down quick." I heard his retreating foot steps.
I padded myself to bathroom , brushed my teeth and took a quick shower . I wore some black skinny jeans, red tank top anf a flannel and combed my auburn hair into a slick high ponytail then grabbed my backpack and phone.
Downstairs, I saw Zack was on his phone. As soon as he saw he cut his call and came to me.
"Are you feeling good now?"
I was until now. " Yeah I'm okay ."
He led me to the dining table , where stacks of pancakes are filled. We both like pancakes and have the same choice towards food.
Unlike yesterday we made small talk. After breakfast he took me to school.
I was ready to bolt out as soon as reached my school building. His hand shot out and he grabbed my arm. What now? Curiously I turned my head towards him , he left my arm but cupped my nape and pulled me towards him. What is he doing? Don't tell me- All thoughts flew away when I felt something feathery on my forehead. His lips lingered there for some seconds before backing away. But his blue eyes which always fascinated me, tells me a different story. I can't , this is too much. He no longer made any attempt to hide it. I could not remove my eyes from him , it's hypnotic . He smirked at me. Bastard.
I muttered a quick goodbye and got out of his car.
He knows. He fucking knows. He had just waited for me to realise all by myself and now he also knows I got it all figured.
---------------
'Cafe Cold', I had no idea how I came to think of this. I admit it was impulsive move, anything to distract my brain from thinking certain things. Plus soon I would be working at my father's company, I need to level up my interactions with people.
I need to find the manager. " Hello ma'am . Welcome to Cafe Cold. So, table for one."
"Hello. Actually I need to speak to your manager." Her brows furrowed as if she was contemplating. Shit she must be thinking I asked to complain. " I'm here to apply for part time job."
"Oh" Her tensed posture relaxed . Poor her. " Yes , please ma'am right this way."
" Please call me Ana". I followed her and we stopped in front a wooden door.
" Sir will be right inside. "
" Thank youu--"
"Sera".
" Thank You Sera"
" Your welcome and good luck Ana". She went on her merry way. I took knocked his door. I heard a faint 'Come in'. I entered inside. In front of me a short man in his late fifty sitting on a chair behind a large desk. He looks like your jolly grandpa from parks during a evening walk.
I went to him he gestured me to take a seat and a seat. Thank God.
"Yes, dear. How may I help you?"
"Sir I am actually here for part time job".
"Have you ever worked before."
"No." I told him truthfully.
"Right now we are need of cashier as the previous one has left , still we could not give it to just anybody."
" I understand but I assure you I am a fast paced learner and pretty good at communication ."
"How about you come tomorrow and work here as a trial day."
"Sure".
I left his chamber and ordered myself a chocolate milkshake and went home.
Dustin was not at home . He is with some client, some sudden urgency. I informed Gen about the job and she is cool with it. She cooked for two of us, I helped in cutting vegetables. I couldn't cook to save my life. It's kind of awful. We both ate dinner, I wanted to wait with her for Dustin but I couldn't stop yawning Geneviève insisted I should go to bed and she would wait a bit for him as she is not tired yet.
I dragged myself to bed and was ready dive in my duvet but a ping in my phone caught my attention.
It was a message from Zack.
'Good Night'
I put my phone in the nightstand.
"Night Night Zach".