Jake held my hand, as we sat in the grass on the hill where we were alone. The sun was going down, the warmth of his hand was currently my favourite feeling and the colour his brown eyes got, golden like warm, sweet honey was currently my favourite colour. His curly hair framed his handsome face, and I knew that while I still had a lot to figure out and to overthink, this felt right.
"So, what now?"
"What do you mean?"
"What are we now? How does this work? And when are we going to tell Lilly?"
"Wait, you don't know how it works when people like each other?"
"Wait, you're considered people now?" I poked Jake between his ribs to tease him.
"I am," he said and tried to tickle me as revenge but it didn't work. Jake laid his hand on my cheek and turned it to him.
"Am I allowed to kiss you?" Jake asked softly, as if he was scared of the answer.
"Yes, you can" I said softly as if I could break easily, gently he kissed me on the lips, and I kissed him back.
Jake smelled like sandalwood and summer, and warmth, his kiss felt so light on my lips, but at the same time, it felt right, solid as if he was sure of this touch, this feeling. When the kiss was over he was silent, and so was I.
"Jade Elodie Mercier, will you please allow me to be your boyfriend?"
"Yes," I kissed him again. I wished I could have stayed like that forever, behind the hill in the sun with Jake, but when the signal went off it was time for the next thing on the schedule and we had to stand up and leave.
Somehow the rest of the day went by in a blur. I felt good knowing Jake felt the same way about me as I felt for him, so good the things that usually bothered me didn't get to me at all. Not Kevin and his nonsense, not the girls who couldn't stand me without even knowing me.
Having to leave my house at six years old, it was so long ago I had a home I had forgotten what it felt like, but those moments behind the hill, those moments made Jake feel like home, or even better, it made those moments feel like a life I wished I could have.
I knew this couldn't last. Nothing good lasted in my life, but at least I could have this for now, and cherish the memories later. It felt right. The question was how long will it take this time?
When we arrived at the waterpark Josie, Ximena and I took dressing cabins next to each other. As if it was the three of us all these years we were done at the exact same time.
Josie and Ximena both had black bikinis, I had a bathing suit. While we walked to the main pool, looking around I saw all the other girls walking around, all of them looked gorgeous, all of a sudden something happened that I never experienced before.
I felt insecure about my body, anxious someone else would look at my body and see how ugly I was. I tried to suck in my tummy and hoped no one would look too much at my body.
I knew rationally I had to not show any of this, if it were up to me I ran back to the lockers and changed back, but it was too late, Jake and Wyatt already walked our way and Jake looked at me just like he always did.
"You look gorgeous." It was almost as if he knew what I was thinking, knowing I needed the reassurance. I was grateful he thought so at least, but I couldn't stop myself from worrying and feeling tense because of my feelings of insecurity.
When we got back at the camp a few teachers made a campfire, and while the other campfires so far were just an excuse to warm by the fire and to eat burned marshmallows and smores.
Tomorrow would be our last night here, and while usually at the time I would go to bed, I would stay awake for hours, overthinking things and if I really couldn't sleep imagining what life could be like if I were born into a different family from different parents. Tonight, however, I didn't. All I thought about was the feeling I felt while Jake played guitar, and looked at me as if I was to him what he was to me.
The night after Josie and Ximena were waiting for me on my bed.
"So, time for a make-over?" Josie had a broad smile on her face and her eyes were glistening, excited about seeing me like this.
Josie did my make-up, Ximena did my hair and once they were done I wanted to check what I had when I found Lillith had packed me a dress.
It had straps so thin I could never imagine they could hold the weight of the dress, the body was tight, the skirt was loose and layers of transparent black material were layered so it looked ripped on the bottom, but in a stylish way. The dress was the most beautiful dress I had ever seen. Even Josie and Ximena gasped as they saw the dress.
When I was wearing the dress, the make-up was done and my hair was done nicely so it fell in soft waves I really wished I had a mirror to see myself. As an extra surprise, Josie left the cabin shortly to grab a camera she had with her After she followed Andrew.
"Is it picture time?" He asked while having a smirk on his face until he saw me.
For a moment he went silent, looking at me, I didn't get why he did but a blush spread over my cheeks. Before camp, I had an honest talk with Lillith about how I felt left out since puberty started, tonight my new friends did everything in their power to make me feel included.
"Ready ladies?" Andrew asked to catch our attention while he held his hand up for the camera.
The moment I saw Jake was inside, as usual, surrounded by beautiful girls who liked him just like I did. The moment I entered the room and Jake saw me it was like one of those magical moments in the movies, where the girl was the only one in sight for the boy she was crushing on.
Jake was dressed in black jeans, and a white shirt, it was basic, not like him at all. As soon as Jake recovered from his first glance at me he looked at me with the same look he always did.
"Milady," he said with a hoarse voice and he took my hand to kiss it. I'd normally roll my eyes and feel awkward about something so corny, but not now, not with him.
Once again I blushed, not used to Jake being this formal. While Jake asked me to dance, got me something to drink, and stayed close to me the first hour I noticed other boys looking at us, looking at me, and not only the boys, but many of the girls who usually hung around Jake looked at me.
"Excuse me if I'm out of line," Jake whispered while a Rihanna song was playing, "but you look amazing, I can't remember seeing you in a dress ever before. You are even more gorgeous than usual."
I blushed as the song finished. I felt suspicious about how well life was this past week and what would come after camp, but I buried those thoughts as I tried to enjoy the night. It was weird, to be watched by others.
For now, I had it all. The nice dress, the boy, and even if I lost it all tomorrow I could always look back at this night and this week and smile at the memories.
Tomorrow I'd have to tackle talking to Lillith about what happened. I'd have to admit I had fallen in love with her brother. I wasn't even sure if this would stay when we got back to school, and our daily lives.
For once I felt at peace, and happy, as if I could have it all like I had this past week. I hoped this would stay.
The other girls in my cabin ignored me as usual, I was okay with them leaving me alone while I got in bed before I fell into a deep sleep, hoping I would dream about this night without an end.
Of course, I knew there would be an end, but for once, I started to get hope. I started to feel hopeful that I could have this one thing.