Akan was dumbfounded.
He didn't even know what he was surprised at. Because she resents him? Or because she's sad? Or because he got slapped in the face?
'If that's not the case, my wife should've taken it for granted, how can a person say such a thing?'
Akan looked at his wife.
Instead of hating Akan, she said.
"I've never regretted it."
It was a sad and bitter remark.
Although she doesn't have tears. Akan felt that his wife was crying.
"You know what?"
His wife bit her lips for a while and opened it.
"I have no regrets."
As if determined, his wife raised her head.
"Having this child, of course, wasn't a plan. It happened naturally, just like with any other married couple."
Slowly, the story was brought out.
Just as she married as a noble's duty, she had thought the same about childbirth. It was her duty as a faithful wife to have a successor.
In fact, she always wondered if she could be attached to a child.
"However, the child who came to me was very lovely."
She was also amazed at how she felt this way.
Akan still remained as firm as ever.
"Do you remember the moment when you felt the baby move?"
Akan's eyes shook for a moment.
Of course, he remembered.
[Honey, the baby kicked!]
Rarely did his wife speak to Akan in a pleasant voice.
Attracted by the mysteriousness of her words, he reached over his wife's stomach.
Obviously, the powerful movement of the child felt full in the palm of his hand.
He remembered it as a very strange moment.
"This is our child."
As firmly as she declares, his wife said.
'She's such a firm person.'
His wife had a face that Akan had never seen before.
As it was difficult to give birth, it was because her health was not good. Unconsciously, he thought she was a weak wife.
"At the beginning of having a child, I was confused. Even though I was scared, excited, I couldn't express my feelings; I didn't know. But I fell in love with my child anyway."
His wife said.
"Since you're a parent, wasn't that the same for you?"
Akan was shocked.
He didn't know this answer would come back. He had never thought of it this way.
'Parents?'
When he saw Charlize, he didn't feel like she was the child of the Grand Duke and the deceased Grand Duchess.
It's just because Charlize was born after killing the Grand Duchess, and she was treated more like a stranger than a blood relative.
His wife spoke in a determined tone.
"We are the parents, we are the ones who gave birth to this child, and we are the closest family members of this child. But it is unforgivable to ask if I hate her because I almost died."
"…"
"You didn't know, so I think you asked, and I'll just listen this time."
Does she mean that she will understand even though she is angry?
After a moment's silence, she stared at Akan. Akan lowered his hand that was touching his cheek.
After a silent stare, the wife broke the silence.
"It must have been because of the grandmaster."
A taboo subject throughout their marriage.
Akan paused and looked at his wife. She breathed out slowly.
"I know the story about the Ronan family."
He felt his wife's breath quiver. More vivid words of sadness followed.
"Because I've seen what the people of this castle thought of her. But."
"…"
"It's not the grandmaster's fault. It was just an accident. I used to think so."
She didn't stop crying. Soon his wife began to cry, perhaps because she was overwhelmed with emotions.
The sight of tears made Akan distraught.
It felt like his heart stopped beating.
"I… While giving birth to our child, I was willing to die."
His wife was sobbing, but somehow continued to talk.
"She was so lovely, so pretty, so sad when she heard that her mother might die, and at that moment, I thought, at least for this child, I want her to see the light, because she's my beloved child, and I've been with her for ten months."
"…Wife."
"Isn't she a child mixed with your blood and mine?"
Akan was shocked.
When he called, his wife became even more intensified.
"Who wouldn't want to live? But… the reason I wanted to live at that moment was that I wanted to meet our pretty child."
Tears streamed down from his wife's eyes.
In life, people rarely hear words that change their lives.
Akan had a gut feeling that those words were what her present wife was talking about.
Eye contact.
Transparent tears and pure heart. Unfathomable love flows desperately. A heart that cannot be hidden. It completely broke the boundaries of Akan.
Akan's heart was squeezed.
"I wanted to watch her grow up, hold her hand, and be with her. I loved her so much that I couldn't think of anything else in my life."
His wife burst into tears and said,
'She can't even think of a life like that.'
Akan was shocked. Shock. Very shocking. Grand Duchess, of course, Charlize.
"She must have loved her."
Because she chose Charlize and lost her life.
He felt like he had been hit on the head with a hammer.
A piece of memory came to his mind that he tried to forget.
At the time of the birth of Charlize, the doctor told the suffering Grand Duchess.
[If you kill the fetus, you can live.]
[No, please…]
And the Grand Duchess, apparently, pleaded with the doctor in a faintly fading voice.
She looked up at the doctor with desperate eyes and shook her head.
Dante doesn't remember, but little Akan definitely heard it.
'That.'
She wanted Charlize to see the light.
'Because she loved Charlize.'
He felt the firm stubbornness he had built up with arrogance breaking down.
Akan was about to collapse.
No, he's already collapsed.
He didn't even know what was flowing from his eyes. Cold tears fell down. He choked up. He couldn't close his eyes.
"Then you've never hated the child…?"
Akan felt his harsh voice like a stranger.
His wife replied.
"Yes, never."
Akan thought of the deceased Grand Duchess.
From the beginning, he heard that she was weak and resisted everyone's disapproval, and gave birth to Charlize.
He thought Charlize had killed the Grand Duchess. A murderer who took the life of the Grand Duchess.
"Actually, maybe it's because I have children."
His pulse thumped and his eyes were strangely red. His hands trembled.
"If my child is treated like that, my heart will be heartbroken and torn. So, I feel sorry for your mother who died without seeing such a beautiful grandmaster. I sympathize with her."
Akan sobbed.
His wife was crying.
The fire in the fireplace burns down.
Regret stabbed Akan's lungs sharply. She must have been very precious to the Grand Duchess. She would have been happy to save her life.
She must have closed her eyes hoping everyone would bless her. But what happened to the rest of them?
'We threw Charlize into a cold room, wishing her death.'
Treating her as a murderer, not as Ronan.
If she saw this. The Grand Duchess… The Grand Duchess.
Her heart would be torn. Because of the shock, Akan didn't even know what he was doing.
The regret was so great that he couldn't even feel it. It felt like he was just crushed to death.
'What have we done so far?'
Akan's world collapsed and shattered.
Why didn't he realize it until now? The reason why the Grand Duchess gave birth to Charlize was because she loved her.
'Charlize. Charlize.'
Where should he start? Where should he start thinking? No, he can't even say an apology or atonement.
From the start, he ruined the child and left her horribly.
Now irrevocably. Realizing that, a beastly cry came out.
Akan was sick.
The realization was so sudden that it was too painful to handle.
'Charlize must have suffered more than this.'
Tears poured down like crazy.
But there was no time to feel ashamed.
Because his heart was torn.
His eyes were whitened with regret, and his back neck became sore and his whole body became cold. He's terribly sorry.
Just enough to want to die.
To the point where he wants to rip his mouth off for speaking harshly to that child. To the point where he wants to dig out his eyes that had turned away from her. Enough to want to cut off a hand that had never been kind to that child.
Akan was sobbing.
The tears didn't stop. No matter how much he exhaled, he couldn't seem to breathe. It was hot and painful.
He undermined the child's talent with arrogant thoughts. He wounded Charlize, who was able to shine brightly, to death.
He ignored Charlize's efforts to be loved. He turned away. He didn't recognize her. He took it for granted.
"Ah…!"
Charlize is not coming back. It was just a realization.
A precious and beautiful little sister. The existence that the Grand Duchess loved with her life.
Lost forever.
There is no way to go back. He felt like his head was going to explode with frustration and despair. Rather, he wanted to die.
His lungs turned upside down and he wanted to rip his chest.
"I, I…"
Akan was in tears. Words weren't enough. Yeah, he realized it deeply.
'I can't even make excuses now.'
Because even the last excuse was blocked.
"…"
Dante and the Grand Duke, who came to talk about Charlize, were watching this.
They were behind the wall because they couldn't intervene with his wife when she was talking about her child.
Akan's cries were heard.
'What did I hear?'
Dante's eyes were so shocked that they lost focus. Suddenly, his body trembled.
Clattering.
He heard a wall in his head falling apart. The wall was hope.
But there are no more embers to burn. It's dead. Only the ashes remained and disappeared. Now he couldn't deny it or justify it.
They have sinned against Charlize to death. They made a mistake that could never be forgiven.
'This is.'
It was Ronan's sin.
"…No."
The Grand Duke next to him suddenly talked to himself as if he was denying it.
It was not until too long before the Grand Duke knew his wife's heart.
[If it's a girl, it's Charlize, if it's a boy, it's Shan.]
[We still have four months left until childbirth, but you've already decided on a name?]
The Grand Duchess smiled and hugged the Grand Duke. She whispered in a gentle voice.
[Because I'm happy. It makes me happy just thinking about meeting this child. I can't help but think about it.]
The Grand Duchess smiled brightly. Bright enough to make the world brighter.
Such a face filled with happiness, to the extent that the Grand Duke had never seen it before.
[In the ancient language, Charlize means happiness. Shan means the sun. I want this child to live a nobler and happier life than the sun. I can't wait to meet this child.]
"…"
Memories poured down as if they had waited. Tears fell from the eyes of the Grand Duke. He didn't close his eyes.
He didn't close his eyes even though they seemed to be burning. He heard it. He just heard his child cry. He felt it. He felt the end.
However, the reality was not accepted by the Grand Duke.
Because.
'You mean we were wrong?'
No way.
That can't be.