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The Guide of Unserious Immortal Cultivation

Mocking Phoenix
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Synopsis

Chapter 1 - Chapter 1: The Master is Gone at the Start

Wu Zhou.

To the north of Langyu County, Dongyang Prefecture, Ning Province.

Bordered by hazy green mountains and misty clouds that seem to resemble swimming fish amongst the pattern of undulating clouds, giving off an impression of a casual yet elegant ink painting.

Though not a sacred mountain with divine veins, it is rich in spiritual bamboo, and has nine peaks because of which it is named Nine Bamboo Mountain, a place of minor fame within the Ning Province.

Climbing up the mossy stone steps winding through the mountain, you can find an unremarkable Taoist temple within an unassuming peak.

Weathering years of rain and wind, cracks spread across the temple's outer walls, its signboard nowhere to be found, and its front yard overrun with weeds and a luxuriant green plant growing out of a puddle...

Upon closer inspection, one would find that this is not any plant backdrop, but a ding-shaped incense burner that had been neglected for years and overrun by vegetation.

Retracting previous statements, this Taoist temple is not entirely unremarkable, with traces of the passage of years visibly scattered everywhere.

"Disciple, your master's time is running out. I won't be in this world for much longer. I'll give you a few simple last words, now listen carefully..."

Under the old tree in the backyard, an old man and a young man sat cross-legged. The elderly Taoist with youthful complexion and white hair stroked his goatee: "Don't be sad, birth, aging, sickness, and death are the norm for everyone, don't make any wailing gestures."

Opposite him, the young man raised his hand to touch the slightly dry corner of his eye and nodded heavily: "Okay."

"Don't worry, although I don't have much time left, I've already sent a message to your senior sister Bai Jin, she will guide you carefully in cultivation practice. Thirty years ago, she was the first disciple of the Lingxiao Sword Sect, I wonder how she is doing now."

"Speaking of the Lingxiao Sword Sect, I quite miss it. What a pity. If I hadn't accidentally inflicted a serious injury on the head of the sect back then, I would definitely want to pay it a visit before my time."

"Forget it, times have changed, there's no point in talking about all this old stuff..."

"..."

An hour later, the young man blinked in confusion, turned to look at the dying man who was still talking non-stop, and secretly moved his stiff legs a little.

What the hell, they were supposed to talk about a few simple last words, so why is he become more energetic as he rambles on?

Could it really be that he has already seen the ghost?

"Oh yes, my disciple."

Perhaps realizing he had been rambling on, the old Taoist coughed lightly and said seriously: "Master knows that accepting a master was not your intention and you have grievances against it, but I didn't lie to you. With your aptitude, it would be a waste not to pursue immortality."

The corner of the young man's mouth twitched. Forgive him for being straightforward and quick-witted since childhood, it's clear that the old Taoist, who is one foot in the coffin, feeling that time is running out, randomly chose a lucky audience member.

And he just happened to be close by.

"Yes, my disciple, me as your master..."

The old Taoist coughed several times in succession, raising his sleeve to cover half of his old face: "In a hurry, I was rushing on my way here and forgot to ask for your name... um, what's your name?"

Lu Bei: "..."

Not in a hurry, you have been reminiscing about your past for two hours.

"Virtuous disciple?!"

"Lu Bei."

"Great name, I'm Mo Buxiu, the head of the Feather Gate of the Three Pure Peaks at Nine Bamboo Mountain. After my death, you will succeed as the sect head."

With one sentence, he smoothly moves past the awkwardness, raises his hand to point the surroundings, trying to regain his previous seriousness: "I believe you have already realized, this noble place with excellent people is the Feather Gate of Three Pure Peaks, from today onwards you will be in charge."

Lu Bei: "..."

So, the 'excellent people' is him, and 'noble place' refers to the dense vegetation?

If it's like that, he finds it hard to refute.

Clearly, Mo Buxiu's struggle was in vain. Tangible seriousness dissolved when the master and disciple were exchanging names, and the Feather Gate, described as a place with an excellent landscape, only made the atmosphere even more awkward.

After staring at each other for a while, Mo Buxiu started to explain, his character was rather active, he preferred to roam outside for cultivation thus it is understandable and logical that his home was overrun by grass.

"Alright,Disciple, enough chitchat, your master really doesn't have much time left."

Seeing Lu Bei showing signs of running away, Mo Buxiu pulled out the Universe Bag from his waist, grabbed Lu Bei's hand, hastily stuffed the bag in and spoke swiftly: "The Sect Leader's license and title deeds are in there, along with the 'Fetal Breathing Qi Replenishing Skill' that I got in Kunlun Far West Land. Although this book is not mainstream, it has a profound meaning, which is a rare and wondrous book in the world. I've attained too high a level, therefore, I can no longer cultivate this skill, and you've just stepped into the door, therefore, it's perfect…"

Mid-sentence, Mo Buxiu's pupils dimmed dejectedly, his hand holding Lu Bei's arm fell, and he went silent without making a sound.

The departure was so sudden that Lu Bei couldn't believe his eyes. Just a moment ago, he was full of energy speaking non-stop for two hours, then all of a sudden he was gone, Lu Bei stretched out two fingers to quietly place them under the old man's nose.

It was at this test!

Snap!

Mo Buxiu slapped away Lu Bei's hand, took a deep breath: "Continue, where did I left off? Right, I don't have much time and have already sent a message to your senior sister Bai Jin regarding cultivation... Wait, how did the Universe Bag get into your hands?"

Lu Bei: "..."

"Oh, I remember now, I've already state that!"

Right after Mo Buxiu realized, he gave his head a hard smack: "Look at your master's brain, it's stopped working even before I'm dead."

Go ahead and hit it harder, it may just stop responding!

Lu Bei rolled his eyes. If he hadn't resisted the journey and found he couldn't fight back, he would have given Mo Buxiu a punch in the face, no matter what.

But in the end, the dead should be respected. Technically, Mo Buxiu was dead and he, a living being, found it futile to bear a grudge against the dead.

"Disciple, although I can't guide you in your cultivation, cultivation is not all about practicing. Here I have a piece of advice for you to bear in mind."

Mo Buxiu took out a wooden box from his Universe Bag and put it into Lu Bei's hands: "One should neither harm others nor neglect one's defenses. Keep this 'Fetal Breath Replenishing Skill' safe and don't tell anyone about it, not even your senior sister."

What does that mean, senior sister is not a good person?

Lu Bei frowned, nodded and said nothing more. He stuffed the book into his bosom in front of Mo Buxiu.

"Then, I have no regrets, except..."

While saying this, Mo Buxiu stared at Lu Bei unblinkingly: "Phew, have you noticed that you haven't yet called me 'master' since becoming my disciple?"

Lu Bei shivered as the affectionate gaze fell on him. He wasn't sure if this was an illusion, but those eyes seemed greasy and repulsive.

For a moment, he was distressed.

Remembering the process of being forced to become a disciple, he felt very unwilling. However, considering that Mo Buxiu might be on his last breath, any delay might cause him to die with regrets.

Pity him.

Finally, facing the expectant gaze, Lu Bei took a deep breath and solemnly said:

"Master."

"Good! Good! Good..."

Mo Buxiu clapped with joy, then lowered his head with a smile on his face and fell silent.

Lu Bei: "…"

As a reminder of what had happened before, he wasn't sure if a repeat of history was possible. So, he waited for a while before reaching out to test Mo Buxiu's breath.

Unexpectedly, Mo Buxiu's body was merely the breadth of a palm's distance away when it unexpectedly started rapidly disintegrating, turning into a pile of white ash.

Lu Bei stood there dumbfounded. The wooden box nearby swept up a whirlwind, drawing the white ash into it. In just a few moments, it had completed the collection, leaving only the funeral repast undone.

"This, well…"

Lu Bei was at a loss for words: "Well... convenient."

He tucked away the Universe Bag, picked up the wooden box and began to look around inside the Taoist temple. After some time, he finally found a wooden table meant for offering in the rickety main house.

The rear wall seemed solid and the roof didn't seem on the verge of collapsing. It just wasn't the right time as there were already occupants under the table.

A den of foxes darted out, creating a ruckus as they tried to use their numbers to scare off the uninvited guest.

But it was all in vain. After Lu Bei stomped his foot, the four foxes immediately quieted down and ran off, disappearing into the woods through a hole in the wall.

"In this world, foxes can cultivate into demons. Having chased these tenants away, I wonder if a foxy enchantress will come tugging at my heartstrings tonight?" Lu Bei put down the wooden box, contemplating his careless past. Thinking about how he couldn't carry or lift with his arms, a typical weak scholar predicament, how to spend the night on the mountain was indeed a problem.

Descend the mountain?

Descending was not possible. On the way up, he had clearly seen the rough and steep stone steps which weren't friendly to his fear of heights.

The key issue was that he was very hungry.

After failing to open the Universe Bag, Lu Bei lamented that he was trapped on the mountain. His only hope now laid with Sister Bai whom he had never met, and the vengeful fox demon who might return tonight.

"I hope sister comes soon..."

Lu Bei murmured to himself, closing his eyes and pulling up his status panel.

Name: Lu Bei

Race: Human race

Template: NPC

Level: 3

Experience: 250/900

Qi: 30/30

Life: 22/30 (Hungry, Shocked, Tired)

Main Profession: None

Secondary Profession: Farmer Lv1

Attributes: Strength 2, Speed 3, Spirit 3, Stamina 3, Charm 3, Luck 3

Rating: It's troublesome, but just get the hang of it, there's nothing much to rate!