Love. It was a strong word. Many people used it loosely, no meaning. How was it so easy for me to tell Melania I loved her but it took me forever to speak those words to Gabby. My stomach churned now as I laid next to Gabby. The party was long over but I was almost caught. Callie met me right out side when I was walking out of the bathroom door. I had to lie. As much as I hated it, I had to. She was questioning me about why there was makeup and lipstick on my shirt. I had to lie and I thought of it quick. Only for the lie to be retold to Gabby. I didn't cheat, that was something I didn't do. Everyone knew this so when the lie easily fell off my tongue it was easily believed. Drunk girls and clingy was the only thing I had to mentioned and the topic was dismissed.
Our bedroom was dark, the only light that shine through was that from the street lamps. I couldn't lie and say that I was content because I wasn't. My thoughts were only of her and I couldn't seem to shake it. At the party, when I eventually made it out of the mens room, Gabby was there with a concerned look on her face. She was worried about me when I was doing the last thing she needed to worry about.
Feeling guilty was what I was supposed to feel. I needed to hate myself and remind myself that I had a good woman who loved me supported me. But I didn't. Every time I tried to let myself feel like absolute shit, Melania crept back into my mind and reminded me that I was perfect. That's all she ever told me. That I was hers and I was perfect. Was I going to hate myself because I loved how her words made me feel. Shouldn't I feel like I was? Or was it because those words were coming from another woman's mouth that made it wrong?
I tossed over and looked at Gabby. Her blonde hair was settled on top of her head and clean fresh face. The little specks of glitter that refused to remove from her eye lids. She was my fiancé. She was the woman that I was supposed to feel this way about. She deserved better than what I was giving her. How could one night change everything? It didn't but I forced myself to move on. I probably would have if Melania hadn't come back into the picture. But I didn't regret it. I didn't regret anything when it came to her.
My phone began to vibrate, pulling me out of my thoughts. Frowning, I quickly reached over and grabbed it. It was an unfamiliar number which caused me to click it off and put the phone back in its place. Adjusting myself, I turned over once more only for the phone to go off again. I sighed, whoever it was, was persistent. I reached over and answered it lowly trying not wake up Gabby.
"Hello?" I whispered.
"Hi honey." The voice matched mine.
Melania.
I cleared my throat and looked over at Gabby. She was out like a light. I turned over and grinned a bit to myself.
"Hey, why are you calling me so late, something wrong?" I whispered.
There was a sigh in the other end. "I miss you."
I knew the feeling.
"Mmm, you do?" I asked, grinning.
She laughed softly. "Of course. Why don't you come over? You haven't graced my home for a while."
I closed my eyes and knew that wouldn't be a good idea. Considering I couldn't say no to her, there was no telling what might happen. I could imagine her with the tip of her thumb in her mouth.
"You know I can't do that. You've moved since the last time. Besides it's like three in the morning. I've got work." I let my excuses roll of my tongue.
"But you're talking to me and you're already awake." She pushed.
I smiled, "Hey now. I've got to go. I'll speak to you later."
She sighed in defeat. "I love you."
I loved when she said that.
"Ditto."
I quickly hung up and decided that I wasn't going to get any sleep. Looking up at the ceiling, I debated on getting up. I had to be at work at 5:30, the logical thing to do would try to get more sleep but I decided to get up. Swinging my legs over the bed, my feet dug into the plushy rug and stretched my joints out. I didn't even sleep last night. I was too wired. Standing up, I headed towards that bedroom door and into the kitchen. I was being very quiet and careful not to wake Gabby.
Quietly, I began rummaging around to start some coffee. I needed it if I was going to function in zero sleep today. This was my normal time to get up anyway. Showering and making coffee took awhile.
"Babe?"
I quickly turned around to see Gabby standing there rubbing her arms.
"What are you doing up so early?" She whined.
I chuckled and shook my head. "I'm always up this early."
She pressed the heels of her palms to her eyes. "Why?" She asked in disbelief.
"I like to be on time." I shrugged.
She yawned and walked to the coffee pot. "But it's three fifteen in the morning."
"Hmm."
There was silence for a while. Gabby watched the coffee brew, her blonde hair shining from the dim light over stove. I decided to go ahead and grab some mugs from the shelf.
"Who was that on the phone?" Gabby asked.
Damn.
"Kev." I pushed out. Cursing myself for yet another lie.
She hummed from behind me. "What did he want? I thought he'd be laid up with some whore." I could practically hear her roll her eyes eyes.
Kevin was my best friend. He'd been my friend since grade school. We did everything together. Where you seen one you seen the other. He was a bit of a goofball but that's what made him Kevin. I think that's what makes girls attracted to him even more. He can make them laugh. I was never able to do that.
Sighing, I walked up behind her and hugged her waist. "Come on, be nice. It's not his fault."
She whirled around and looked at me like I was insane. "Not his fault that he's a whore?"
"Not his fault that he can attract so many women." I corrected.
"Well it's his fault because he doesn't have to sleep with them. That's how he lost his girlfriend Nina." She nodded to herself as if she'd made a good point.
I shrugged. "That's Kevin."
"I'm glad I was lucky to find you though." She smiles up at me and wrapped her arms around my neck. "But you, you're one of those guys who were neatly and carefully put together. You know what you want, you understand what you have and you do what you can to keep it. You know?"
I cleared my throat. She thought more of me than I deserved. She was wrong, I wasn't one of those guys. I didn't appreciate her the way I should.
"Oh coffee is finished." I changed topics as the coffee maker beeped. Thank goodness for that.
Gabby sighed in relief, unwrapping her arms from around my neck. "Yes, coffee. Now."
"Gabby you can get some more rest, you didn't have to get up." I cocked my brow.
She shrugged. "I know but I heard you in the kitchen and I decided to get up. I figured you were gonna fix coffee anyway." She poured her a mug.
I patiently waited for her to be finished, reaching for the coffee pot as she did for the creamer.
"Sugar?" I asked her but she shook her head and visibly trembled her whole body.
"No thanks. I'm dieting." She spoke which made be eye her up and down.
I rose my brow, "Why? You look fine."
"Yes but I need to look perfect. I have to look great in my wedding dress. Oh! Which reminds me, we have more planning to do for the wedding." She listed.
I sighed and shook my head. She had to bet perfect when in reality she didn't. Gabby wanted everything perfect. The house, our life, our job. Even me. I wasn't perfect and Gabby never failed to make sure I knew I wasn't. If it wasn't the wet shoes and clothes, it was picking up after myself, to even making sure had the latest phone out. She had to be on top of things. But she was always like this and I always thought it was cute and so girly of her. Now it was just something I've came to terms with and got over.
"Did you hear me babe?" Her voice chime in making me come back to the conversation at hand.
I looked over and shook my head. "My head was somewhere else. What did you say?"
She huffed and chucked her spoon in the sink making a clinking sound. "Never mind."
Frowning, I watched as she grabbed her coffee and head back to the room. "Gabby what did you say, I was just —
"In La La land like you always are. I'm going back to sleep after having coffee." She spoke from the hall as she head towards the bedroom.
Before I could speak, I heard the door shut and I was left alone once more in the kitchen. I stirred my coffee and headed to the living room and decided to read the last chapter of the book I was supposed to read for work. Gabby didn't have to be at work until seven so she had time to rest more. But it was now, three forty-eight. I didn't have that much time.
•
When I left the house, Gabby was still asleep. I kissed her cheek and made sure I left her a morning message like I always did before I left. It was a sticky note that said whatever I needed to say. It was now five - fifteen and I was climbing into my car that was parked beside Gabby's. I should have made sure I turned the heat on before getting in because it was freezing.
My phone began to buzz as I turned the heat on. The name across the phone read Kevin. I grinned because I had no idea what wild story he had on the other end of the line for me.
"Hey Kev."
"Where you at X?" He asked, chewing in my ear.
I shook my head. "Heading to work, are you having breakfast?"
"Yup. Why you want some?" He asked. He was out of his mind if he thought for one second I'd share any food with him.
I turned my car out of the drive way, still trying to warm up. "No, I can hear you chew and it's driving me mental."
He scoffed. " Aw. I was about to say you wasn't getting none anyway so don't ask."
"Mm right. My feelings are hurt." I said sarcastically. "You at work?"
"Yea, well in the parking lot. I had to eat." He explained.
I frowned as I stopped at stop sign. "Why don't you just eat at your desk?"
"Why don't you just mind your business?" He joked and I laughed.
"Ok alright. That's fine." I hung up because I was going to pull right next to him. Which was going to be funny because Kevin never payed any attention to his surroundings.
When I got next to his navy blue car, he was leaning over taking a drink from his cup. His phone was in his holder on the dash. I smiled and quickly but quietly got out of my car. I went to my trunk and got my clown mask out, slipping it over my face. Walking up to Kevin's window, I stopped and fell open arms on his window.
He jumped as his fries fell to the floor. His eyes were wide with fear. I could stop the belly laugh that came. I jerked my mask off as he opened the door of his own car and jumped out. He was short but his attitude was seven feet tall.
"What kind of shit was that dude? Could a scared me into cardiac arrest." He was hyped.
I put my hands on my knees and finished up my laughter. "Oh please. I'm not that lucky. Now come on and wipe the crumbs from your face."
He pushed passed me while I still chuckled and grabbed his bags from car and his drink. I went to shut my trunk and grab my work bag as well. From the the parking lot, I could see Callie talking to a man in the building.
"What have you been up to though?" Kevin asked me as I adjusted the strap over my shoulder.
I sighed, "Nothing much just Gabby and the wedding. But I do need to talk to you later."
"Why she broke up with you didn't she? I knew it. I told you Xavier, I get the women. She wants me and I knew it was only a matter of time until she got with m—
"No stupid. It's about something else but when I have time I'll get into more detail." I scoffed.
He nodded but looked at me. "You good for real?
I shrugged, "I honestly don't know."
Once we reached the double doors, Callie acknowledged me with a raising of the eye brow and rolling of the eyes to Kevin.
"I don't know why she's showing out. She knows she loves me. So that attitude can go." He said in all seriousness making me grin.
She was talking to Greg but it looked more business related than personal. He gave me a nod but I didn't respond. They wrapped up the conversation as Callie walked over towards us.
"Hey bro." She nudged me and smiled.
"And Kevin. Come on Callie don't act like you don't see me." He smirked. Her smile fell from her face.
She narrowed her eyes at him. "I don't like you at all. You know that."
"You don't have to like me to want me sweet cheeks." He grinned.
She took a step forward towards him but I grabbed her and slung my arm around her neck.
I walked with her to my desk while she kept trying to look back at Kevin.
"What's up Cal?" I asked.
She rolled her eyes from and looked ahead in the direction we were walking. "Nothing much, oh we have a meeting with Charles the new President of the Company."
"Why?" I snarled.
She pushed my arm off, "Because it's been said that you are one of the best writers we have here. I beg to differ but whatever."
"Jealousy isn't cute on you Callie." I smirked.
She laughed as we came up to my cubicle. "As if. And you have a quick meeting."
My playful grin dropped and was replaced with shock. I'm not sure if my face was full of emotion or not but I couldn't help it regardless.
"Xavier, this is Melania Forsythe. Melania, my brother Xavier Jacobs."
She grinned that sexy grin she always gave me.
"Hi Xavier."
What was happening?
-BLOODBANDIT