I've been thinking about death a lot lately. Learning to do the hangman's noose intrigued me. Cutting wrists made me curious, so as overdosing. I wonder what's my purpose in life. Was I just born to live a life I didn't even want to live? Was I just born to suffer?

Going back home makes me feel like I'm going back to a gloomy tunnel of the harsh reality of life. It's boring to stay at home, and sometimes, I really don't want to go home. Sometimes I'd rather sleep alone in an apartment of my own or I'd rather sleep on my empty closed café at night 'til morning. Oh, yeah, I haven't thought yet of trying to sleep in my café? I can actually camp in my café, bring my luggage and stuff since I own it. But wouldn't the chefs be weirded out and would question me early in the morning why the heck am I camping in my cafe?

Honestly, my Chefs have been like a family to me. We have nice bonds too, given by the fact that we've been working together for four years now in my cafe. I just treat them like my friends, the way I treat my friends too. But, do I have friends? Well, yeah, I do, I guess, or just a bunch of old high school acquaintances whom I am not even close with and whom I not even trust. Trusting your colleagues fully is one of the biggest mistakes I have ever made in my life. If someone would ask me what's one of the biggest and wisest advice that I could ever give, is not trusting anyone. Even if it is your long best friend, childhood friend, your relatives, or even a lover. I'm honestly not sure about the case of a lover, but yeah, don't trust everyone else fully. Because in the end, in a glimpse of an eye, they are already turning their backs on you, betraying you, and leaving you alone, shattered, and in pain. That's how life is. You've really just got to accept all of the things that is happening to you even if you don't want to. Life will forcedly make you swallow everything up.

It's currently 6:18 p.m. in the evening. I took a taxi today instead of driving on my own to the city, and of course, I'll be going home again with a taxi cab. I'll just get my car when I'll be leaving later to camp in my cafe. Who cares if I camp there, right? Well, my parents will be surely pissed if I tell them about it. But why should they even know about it, they're in Czechia now.

The driver is speeding at 80 miles per hour, I'm eager to go home and to pack my things up. A cat suddenly crossed the road out of nowhere causing the taxi driver to step on the brakes hardly and made the car lost control. I can feel my heart racing, the adrenaline, here it goes. I keep my eyes close as the car spins uncontrollably on the highway. I can hear loud noises coming from the tires and loud thuds caused by the other cars getting hit by this spinning car. Am I going to die? Now? Seriously?

The car terrifyingly lost control in just seconds, putting our both lives at sake, me and the cab driver.

"Fuck!" I shout loudly and furiously as I realize the car I'm riding with the taxi driver twisted and is now flying in the air.

I closed my eyes, again.

I can see nothing.

I almost can't hear anything too.

I can't breathe.

"Miss! Hold tight!" the driver shouts, but it sounded so soft and quiet, kind of inaudible.

I tried to open my eyes. Everything is blurry.

The car finally crashes into the ground. The strong impact made me bang my head on the front seat.

All I can see is black.